"Today was a terrible day because..."

[Cleobel]

I don't think you have to worry about anybody judging you over it here; I sure won't. Orally is one thing and it's understandable to me how a non-native speaker might struggle if that's the format, however when it comes to your writing/typing, on here and online in general, your English is very good! If I had not known otherwise and only knew of you from the things you've typed here I would not have guessed it was not your native tongue. Wish you the best with your class and oral report struggles (and I think you should continue to try and speak to your professor about it, perhaps even leave a note on her desk at the start of class one day or something asking her to see you for a minute when it's finished and before she leaves quickly, if she doesn't get to e-mail) but I wouldn't worry about any judgements from people here, I can't imagine anybody here being like that.

Being monolingual and always having struggled greatly to learn any new language apart from a few words and maybe phrases, I've got respect for anybody who is as adept at more than one as you demonstrate. :)

Thank you for your support, compliments and advice. That's very kind of you. :)
Sorry to hear that you have always struggled greatly to learn languages. :/

[Cleobel]

@Caunadan @Chakramaster @Neo Emolga

I am writing this post to inform you that my issue with the English class has been solved. Thanks again for your messages. :)

[Neo Emolga]

@Caunadan @Chakramaster @Neo Emolga

I am writing this post to inform you that my issue with the English class has been solved. Thanks again for your messages. :)

That rocks, glad to hear that! :D

We knew you had it in ya.

[Scytherwolf]

Well, I didn't think I'd be posting in this thread so soon, but something happened, and I'm afraid it's going to escalate into something worse and I'm really freaked out right now.

I posted months ago about my (now ex)-friend "Sally." The person who blamed her mental illness on a story I wrote before I'd even met her.

Well, Sally came back.

I thought I'd blocked her on Deviantart, but apparently not, because she commented on something I posted. Most of the comment was okay I guess, but it really freaked me out because I didn't want her to drag me back into the Hell that I was in those months ago.

So I replied, and said I'm not mad at her and please not take it personally but I need to block her because of what happened. This was last night.

Then, earlier today, I got a weird comment saying "I guess the crybaby took it personally *includes a link to Sally saying she's leaving DA* Oh well, who cares." Not the exact wording (I hid the comment and don't want to look at it again) but that's the gist of it. I thought it might be one of Sally's friends trying to make me feel guilty, but I showed it to my sister and she said it sounded a lot like Sally herself. I looked at the account that posted it. It was created today, with 1 single comment (the one to me). So yeah, it's likely that was actually Sally. And that just feels so...manipulative?

I blocked the account, but the reason I'm posting this is because I'm really scared this isn't the end. Because if that was her, she's clearly not above trying to manipulate me into talking to her. I've been super worried all day that she's going to threaten to kill herself again to try to force me.

I just wondered for so long...if she thinks I'm to blame for her mental issues, why does she want anything to do with me?

It makes no freaking SENSE. I just want her to leave me alone. I don't want this.

[Neo Emolga]

Well, I didn't think I'd be posting in this thread so soon, but something happened, and I'm afraid it's going to escalate into something worse and I'm really freaked out right now.

I posted months ago about my (now ex)-friend "Sally." The person who blamed her mental illness on a story I wrote before I'd even met her.

Well, Sally came back.

I thought I'd blocked her on Deviantart, but apparently not, because she commented on something I posted. Most of the comment was okay I guess, but it really freaked me out because I didn't want her to drag me back into the Hell that I was in those months ago.

So I replied, and said I'm not mad at her and please not take it personally but I need to block her because of what happened. This was last night.

Then, earlier today, I got a weird comment saying "I guess the crybaby took it personally *includes a link to Sally saying she's leaving DA* Oh well, who cares." Not the exact wording (I hid the comment and don't want to look at it again) but that's the gist of it. I thought it might be one of Sally's friends trying to make me feel guilty, but I showed it to my sister and she said it sounded a lot like Sally herself. I looked at the account that posted it. It was created today, with 1 single comment (the one to me). So yeah, it's likely that was actually Sally. And that just feels so...manipulative?

I blocked the account, but the reason I'm posting this is because I'm really scared this isn't the end. Because if that was her, she's clearly not above trying to manipulate me into talking to her. I've been super worried all day that she's going to threaten to kill herself again to try to force me.

I just wondered for so long...if she thinks I'm to blame for her mental issues, why does she want anything to do with me?

It makes no freaking SENSE. I just want her to leave me alone. I don't want this.

Don't be freaked out. Take it easy and don't let this get to you, because it would mean Sally's gaining the edge and her schemes are working. You don't want that and it would encourage this same kind of emotionally abusive behavior with you and possibly others if she were to realize it's working.

Continue the account/message blocks on DeviantArt and whatever else she might be contacting you through, but don't respond anymore. You've already made it clear you don't want to be involved with her problems anymore and any kind of response means she's getting through to you and you're listening. You've already tried listening to her, but obviously she didn't listen to you, so don't continue that one-sided exchange. And you and your sister are right, there's a 99.99% chance that account that posted that comment is actually Sally. It sounds like it definitely follows the pattern of manipulation she's been using on you. But good call on blocking that one, too. She's really starting to sound like someone else we're all familiar with... a certain he-who-must-not-be-named. Maybe they can go get married. XD

As I mentioned before, she needs professional help. The kind that only a doctor or therapist can give. Not us everyday peeps online. If she's really feeling suicidal in a sincere way (and not just in a "let me grab this person's heartstrings" way), again, she should be calling that suicide hotline for real guidance, not involve you. A person's empathy and compassion should never be used as a weapon against them. That's just downright evil. So whatever comes out of this, never feel guilty or pressured about anything she's trying to do. You've made your message clear, you've told her you want to be left alone, and that you can't help her. That's it. You've closed the book. Now chuck it in a hole and bury it.

Still, in the end, it definitely sounds like she's attempting once again to leverage emotional abuse to gain control over you. Don't fall for it. Quietly block all of her accounts, ignore her messages, and eventually it will stop. No one enjoys talking to silence for long. Every now and then, she may try another go at it, but continue with the silence and the account blocks.

And yeah, here's to hoping this is the last you have to deal with this and this quickly gets buried. I once had to deal with something similar to this and I'm happy to say it's been quite a few years since the issue resurfaced. I'm hoping you get to enjoy that peace of mind sooner than later.

[Scytherwolf]

Don't be freaked out. Take it easy and don't let this get to you, because it would mean Sally's gaining the edge and her schemes are working. You don't want that and it would encourage this same kind of emotionally abusive behavior with you and possibly others if she were to realize it's working.

Continue the account/message blocks on DeviantArt and whatever else she might be contacting you through, but don't respond anymore. You've already made it clear you don't want to be involved with her problems anymore and any kind of response means she's getting through to you and you're listening. You've already tried listening to her, but obviously she didn't listen to you, so don't continue that one-sided exchange. And you and your sister are right, there's a 99.99% chance that account that posted that comment is actually Sally. It sounds like it definitely follows the pattern of manipulation she's been using on you. But good call on blocking that one, too. She's really starting to sound like someone else we're all familiar with... a certain he-who-must-not-be-named. Maybe they can go get married. XD

As I mentioned before, she needs professional help. The kind that only a doctor or therapist can give. Not us everyday peeps online. If she's really feeling suicidal in a sincere way (and not just in a "let me grab this person's heartstrings" way), again, she should be calling that suicide hotline for real guidance, not involve you. A person's empathy and compassion should never be used as a weapon against them. That's just downright evil. So whatever comes out of this, never feel guilty or pressured about anything she's trying to do. You've made your message clear, you've told her you want to be left alone, and that you can't help her. That's it. You've closed the book. Now chuck it in a hole and bury it.

Still, in the end, it definitely sounds like she's attempting once again to leverage emotional abuse to gain control over you. Don't fall for it. Quietly block all of her accounts, ignore her messages, and eventually it will stop. No one enjoys talking to silence for long. Every now and then, she may try another go at it, but continue with the silence and the account blocks.

And yeah, here's to hoping this is the last you have to deal with this and this quickly gets buried. I once had to deal with something similar to this and I'm happy to say it's been quite a few years since the issue resurfaced. I'm hoping you get to enjoy that peace of mind sooner than later.

I'm definitely trying not to. I just got a message from her on tumblr saying that I was being unfair by blocking her and not giving her a chance to explain. I don't want to. I'm DONE with these conversations. She messaged me anonymously on tumblr so I couldn't block her. This kind of scares me though because she obviously thinks I'm in the wrong and being 'unfair' and that she's totally innocent. And knowing her, she'll spread these rumors about me to everyone else.

I'm definitely not going to respond though. The thing that makes the tumblr message so frustrating is that she is never willing to listen to ME when we disagree. I've tried to explain stuff to her and she just ignored me. So this is extra stupid. Haha, maybe they'd get along. XD

Yeah, I mean, it seems like she has a wierd unhealthy fixation on me (and my story). And wants to blame me/it for everything. And yeah, I mean, we don't even know each other all that well. We never did. We were never super close. So all this just baffling to me. But yes, definitely. Good advice.

Yep, so far I've blocked everything of hers that I can. I'm just a little worried about the fact that she thinks I'm doing it for mean/petty reasons ("accusing her" and "not letting her explain") and she might turn others against me. But I know I shouldn't care about that.

I really hope it is. I just don't get why...she keeps contacting me. After I said I don't want to talk to her. And everything I say gets twisted into something horrible. So I'm just not going to say anything more.

But yeah, thanks a lot for replying to this, I was really freaked out yesterday.

[Scytherwolf]

So one of Sally's friends sends me this:

*Sally* wanted me to stay out of this, but as her friend, I need to say something. Did you know that she had been doing well for a few months and actually showed a decent level of improvement? She told me she wanted to make amends with you and sent an apology email. But then when she tried to offer you advice on DA, you decided to block her. I have never seen her get that depressed that fast before. Was your goal to make her backslide like that? If it was, congratulations. You have succeeded.


Seriously WTF...leave me alone.

[Neo Emolga]

So one of Sally's friends sends me this:

*Sally* wanted me to stay out of this, but as her friend, I need to say something. Did you know that she had been doing well for a few months and actually showed a decent level of improvement? She told me she wanted to make amends with you and sent an apology email. But then when she tried to offer you advice on DA, you decided to block her. I have never seen her get that depressed that fast before. Was your goal to make her backslide like that? If it was, congratulations. You have succeeded.


Seriously WTF...leave me alone.

Must have missed this from earlier...

Ignore it. Highly likely it's Sally herself with extra accounts. Don't respond, just block that one too, and stand your ground. She needs medical help, not people to victimize.

[[Desolate Divine]]

So tonight has been a bit rough on me.

Eighteen months ago (give or take) I lost my best mate. Some people know the circumstances and can understand that there is no going back from this and reconciliation is not possible right now, and I doubt it ever will be. And truth is, the reason for losing said mate shattered my average life and I am realizing now that all this time later, I am still struggling to put it back together.

The problem lies in my dependency on people, when I'm not in a good state of mind. Even if it is just having a beer and talking ****, when I'm not in a great head space, human interaction is what keeps the darkness at bay, and drives it back. And for a long time, this friend was the one I'd hang out with, but now that he is gone, my social life has all but died. Compared to when he was in the picture, I hardly leave the house for anything outside of work and church commitments. These days, my DnD group is my main social outlet but even then it's not enough for me, and I am struggling. Then tonight was rough. It was Saturday night and I had no plans. I really wanted to just go grab a beer with someone, but honestly, couldn't think of anybody who would be free, interested, and that I'd be comfortable asking and making the first contact for it. I ended up posting on my snapchat story asking if anybody would like to go grab a beer, and offering to drive, but had nobody willing to come hang out with me.

And in all honesty, this sort of thing is leading to other things. I'm drinking more because I'm at home, and it's not like I need to drive anywhere or have anywhere to be. Not getting s***faced but it is expensive, and I don't want to become dependent. I am playing computer games and binge watching netflix, until I get sick of whatever I am playing, which then means I go and spend money on a new game, when I have unfinished games already, because I just got sick of playing them non-stop. I'm staying up stupidly late, hoping I can just have a damn conversation with someone on Facebook (which half the time doesn't happen), which means that my sleeping pattern is screwed, and I am eating meals late at night, usually frozen, microwavable crap, or if I haven't been drinking, fast food. Christ, with the amount I have been drinking and the way I've been eating, I have put on over 20kg (44lbs) since I lost my mate.

I just hate this. Honestly, I watch TV shows like How I Met Your Mother, and the dynamic is something I'd kill for. A small, solid core group, with a given place to spend time together. But currently, my social circles are small groups, scattered across the bloody state, who're all either too busy or not interested in the same social stuff I'm into, and I feel like it's killing me.

[Neo Emolga]

So tonight has been a bit rough on me.

Eighteen months ago (give or take) I lost my best mate. Some people know the circumstances and can understand that there is no going back from this and reconciliation is not possible right now, and I doubt it ever will be. And truth is, the reason for losing said mate shattered my average life and I am realizing now that all this time later, I am still struggling to put it back together.

The problem lies in my dependency on people, when I'm not in a good state of mind. Even if it is just having a beer and talking ****, when I'm not in a great head space, human interaction is what keeps the darkness at bay, and drives it back. And for a long time, this friend was the one I'd hang out with, but now that he is gone, my social life has all but died. Compared to when he was in the picture, I hardly leave the house for anything outside of work and church commitments. These days, my DnD group is my main social outlet but even then it's not enough for me, and I am struggling. Then tonight was rough. It was Saturday night and I had no plans. I really wanted to just go grab a beer with someone, but honestly, couldn't think of anybody who would be free, interested, and that I'd be comfortable asking and making the first contact for it. I ended up posting on my snapchat story asking if anybody would like to go grab a beer, and offering to drive, but had nobody willing to come hang out with me.

And in all honesty, this sort of thing is leading to other things. I'm drinking more because I'm at home, and it's not like I need to drive anywhere or have anywhere to be. Not getting s***faced but it is expensive, and I don't want to become dependent. I am playing computer games and binge watching netflix, until I get sick of whatever I am playing, which then means I go and spend money on a new game, when I have unfinished games already, because I just got sick of playing them non-stop. I'm staying up stupidly late, hoping I can just have a damn conversation with someone on Facebook (which half the time doesn't happen), which means that my sleeping pattern is screwed, and I am eating meals late at night, usually frozen, microwavable crap, or if I haven't been drinking, fast food. Christ, with the amount I have been drinking and the way I've been eating, I have put on over 20kg (44lbs) since I lost my mate.

I just hate this. Honestly, I watch TV shows like How I Met Your Mother, and the dynamic is something I'd kill for. A small, solid core group, with a given place to spend time together. But currently, my social circles are small groups, scattered across the bloody state, who're all either too busy or not interested in the same social stuff I'm into, and I feel like it's killing me.

You'll find your crew. For the longest time, I had virtually no one. No real friends and I always felt socially awkward. It happened all throughout high school and college and it's lousy. But eventually I found new friends and we've had plenty of great times. We've played Magic the Gathering, have gone on camping trips, and have had awesome holiday parties. Suddenly my social life had hope again. All it took was just connecting with the right people and finding common interests.

But you can't rush it. You can try to increase your chances by just mingling with more people (the DnD group is a great start), but you can't force a friendship. It's not something you'd even want to force as it can have ugly results later on. See if you can find an exercise class or sports/physical activity club to go to. It's a great way to stay in shape and you can meet people there as well.

As for the beer, try to limit the intake. Maybe just one or two bottles on the weekend or for special occasions. I know, it tastes great, but it is a carb-heavy drink and you don't want to overdo it and make it something you have every day. You don't need to make drastic changes, but do it little by little. If you've been drinking every night, reduce the number of drinks first. Then try limiting yourself to only every night. Then only weekends until you feel you have control over it and it's not a habit.

But yeah, you can't go off of what you see in TV shows. Those types of social dynamics are extremely rare. Watch them for laughs and entertainment, but don't try to use them as a model for what reality should be like.