"Today was a terrible day because..."

[Chakramaster]

my parents have completely stopped talking to me b/c i'm quitting my job after one training day b/c of the mental strain and hell it puts through b/c i'm not suited for retail and especially not a supervisor position in a retail store that has a super super super high theft rate. heck the day i trained someone stole something right in front of us and we can't do anything about it other than just watch them walk away for safety reason. i just wish my parents would understand that i feel bad enough about everything already with my loans and medical bills and i honestly wish i could just run away from home and not tell anyone. somehow they always flip it back on me and pin it like i blamed them for everything like yesterday my mom was like 'no one told you to apply' and all i said to her was 'you sent me the application link' to which she immediately took personally and thought i meant that i was blaming her for me applying to the job which isnt true at all?? and now she's like i'm not talking to you b/c you'll just blame me for whatever happens uwu.

i'm such a cry baby and i've been crying all day b/c im such an anxious person and i feel bad enough already that i have to call tomorrow and pretty much tell them that i'm too stupid and mentally ill to work at a retail position. i've been applying to jobs all day but no ones gonna hire me b/c my degree is virtually useless and i can't handle any more school either or i will mentally implode. i just really wish i wouldve gone to school for art but ig i like to ruin everything for myself.

Awwww, roo. Don't say that about yourself. You're no cry baby. :( we all have our strong suits and something that's just not for you. It's better to stay away from something too stressful. Sure work itself can be stressful, but if it's a bit over the top. It's better to get out early while you can. You are not stupid either. Just explain to them your issue and they should understand. Retail is one stressful day to day sore that just keeps on picking at us all. School is another stress that I can totally understand. You can go for for something art! You honestly don't "need" a degree in it. If you're skilled enough (which we know your art is fantastic) then others will be able to see it as well. Believe me, you CAN succeed there. We can see that and I'm MORE than sure others will see your beautiful art as well.

Honestly your parents shouldn't stop talking to you. That's not right. They should be understanding when it comes to that and the reasonings behind it. Theft in stores are a lot worse than we all originally expect. Then the store safety policy on confronting them is even weirder. So I understand that. Yeah they shouldn't be putting more stress on you by leaving you that way. They should be more supportive to you. I know sometimes we all wish we could run away and leave everything behind, but I think that would make things worse in the end. Blame is tough to take when things are heated. Just give it time because some people can take things the wrong way and it'll only make things worse.

Roo, I'm more than sure you will find a job you will enjoy. If you want to pursue a job involving art. Go for it! I know you get achieve it! Your artwork is really unique and beautiful. Please don't lose hope and if you ever need someone to talk to. Feel free to message me. I'm always willing to help talk to my friends through hard times. We will all always be here for you.

[roo]

I appreciate how kind everyone is ;;/. I basically ended up guilting myself into staying and it might be for the best until I find something better. Even if I only stay for a few months I’d still like to start paying my loans off,,, (that’s all my parents care about lol). And they have a full time person for my position so it’s not like they’d miss me if I only stayed a month or two. It’s just gonna be an icky few months. Maybe it’ll get better idk

[Chakramaster]

Well if your health while you stay isn't doing well. Be sure to let them know so you can leave early. You don't need to push yourself that far to a point it becomes physically unhealthy. I keep telling myself the same thing. "I'll stay here until I find something new." Sadly I still haven't heard back yet. But you totally can! Start sharing your artwork with any graphics design or art business if that's what you'd like to pursue. It'll make things waaaaay easier. Again, if ever you need someone to talk to, be sure to message us. I'm always open to talk to if you need it.

[roo]

Well if your health while you stay isn't doing well. Be sure to let them know so you can leave early. You don't need to push yourself that far to a point it becomes physically unhealthy. I keep telling myself the same thing. "I'll stay here until I find something new." Sadly I still haven't heard back yet. But you totally can! Start sharing your artwork with any graphics design or art business if that's what you'd like to pursue. It'll make things waaaaay easier. Again, if ever you need someone to talk to, be sure to message us. I'm always open to talk to if you need it.

maybe i'll get lucky and get a job at nintendo or something LOL. thats a farfetched dream but it'd be cool to design pokemon cards or something

[Chakramaster]

maybe i'll get lucky and get a job at nintendo or something LOL. thats a farfetched dream but it'd be cool to design pokemon cards or something

Hey one never knows the future of what could happen. It's totally possible. Just make yourself known out there and never give up on that dream. It may be tough, but try to keep positive about it. If not and you have a bad day. Look to your friends for support and happiness.

[Neo Emolga]

I've only heard bad, bad things about working retail. I don't think it's you, roo, it's a hard area to work in and there are people out there that feel like being a customer entitles them to be a complete douchebag to all the employees.

I've had bad jobs. Jobs where I after commuting to work and getting out of my car, I cynically smiled and thought to myself "I wonder what hell I'm in for today!" Take it from me, these kinds of jobs are not worth struggling and hurting yourself physically and emotionally for. There are better ones out there just waiting for you. Yes, there are times when it feels like they're an impossible quest and they don't exist, but they do. You find better people to work with, work that feels rewarding and meaningful, and you feel like you're getting somewhere with your career.

So don't despair. Sometimes good days take a little while to come around, but keep your spirits together. You're a great person and you'll find a place that has people like you ready and happy to do great work together. :3

[[Desolate Divine]]

So I am a bit peeved at the moment.

On the 24th of last month, I got a message from my bosses wife (I know the whole family through church), asking if I would be willing to house sit for them for two and a half weeks. From the 28th to the 14th. Usually I would turn it down (I don't know a great deal about living out of home (in terms of cooking, washing clothes and stuff), and also, living alone isn't good for my mental health, I have come to notice), however they offered me $300, so I accepted it. They used to have one of my friends do it but he recently moved out of home and doesn't want to be paying rent on his own place to not live there for two and a half weeks, so they asked me.

From the start there were some things that weren't ideal, mostly being the fact that the front door can't be locked from the outside. I can lock it at night when I am sleeping, but when I leave the house, I can't lock it. They just leave their doors unlocked, seeing as this house is in one of melbourne's safest suburbs, and their house is really far away from their street, and their neighbors house is very close (they share a driveway). So as uncomfortable as it made me, I left the house unlocked when I would leave to do my things. Granted, I would leave valuables such as my guitar or laptop in the master bedroom.

And in all honesty, I think I have been a great house sitter. I fed the dogs every day, and was here every night (even when it made more sense practically to stay at home some nights), I didn't let the house get overly messy (at worst two or three bowls in the sink, since I am eating alone here, and most night are out, so wait until there are enough to justify filling the sink to clean them), and replaced everything I used (being a few cans of soft drink that I drank, which I replaced with more than I used, as well as the toilet paper I used as I tend to use a bit much and they were low on it). I even slept in a sleeping bag and wore pyjamas for the last two weeks, as I tend to get sores on my back that occasionally bleed during the night, and I didn't want to take any risks with their bedding. Heck, they didn't leave me with enough dog food, so I went to the shops and bought a big bag (and they haven't paid me yet, so this was completely from my pocket).

However today as me really peeved. Last week the cleaner came during the day to clean the house, and they let me know before they left she would be coming. Today I was out the door at 8:30am (which is very rare on a Saturday) and got back close to 11:30pm. However when I got back I noticed something. Light coming from inside the house.

Basically I walked in and saw the kitchen light was left on. That wasn't me. I would make sure all of the lights were off before leaving for that long, and the kitchen has a huge window so I wouldn't even use the light. I proceeded to freak the hell out, as the thing I am terrified most of is home invasions, and end up searching the house room by room to make sure I am alone, before I calmed down enough to see a pile of groceries on the bench and a receipt for them.

Basically, they get back tomorrow and I think they wanted to have food waiting for them as opposed to having to stop by the shop, so had a relative pick up some odds and ends for them. But they didn't tell me that this was happening. They mentioned the cleaner to me, but they didn't send me a message (and I have been in communication with them multiple times with odd questions from my end such as how much feed to give the chickens) to warn me someone was coming, and it resulted in me freaking the hell out. Even just then, I heard noises so stopped typing this, grabbed a kitchen knife and did another sweep of the house.

Here is the thing. I think that was intentional. Last night I had DnD and had my group here, and put a photo on Facebook. I reckon they saw the post and saw it was in their house, so didn't tell me to have whoever did the shopping check on it and report to them. And because of that, the house was a little messy. There was some rubbish on the bench that I hadn't taken out to the bin yet because the bin was at the top of the driveway (five minute walk there and back to get it) and all the time I have been here since it was emptied has been pouring rain), some dishes in the sink, and my towels on the floor in the en suite (as I didn't have time this morning between showering and leaving for the days events). All of this was going to be dealt with tonight, as they get home tomorrow.

My plan tomorrow was to be awake early as I don't know what time they will be back, and if I can, wait around until they do get back so I can get paid, but now I don't even want to see them. They can give me the money they owe me (both for the house sitting and buying their dog food) when I see them at church tomorrow night or at work during the week. I will get up at 8am and get the hell out of this damn house. I am so done.

[Noblejanobii]

Failed a test I thought I did pretty well on. Just can't win in this chemistry class.

But even worse I woke up to the news that the KyoAni studios were set ablaze by an arsonist. At least 33 were dead last I checked. While I haven't watched many of their shows lately, they brought me a lot of joy during my freshman year of college and provided a place for me to relax when my first year would get overwhelming. It's really disheartening to hear this happened and I hope the arsonist (who has been caught) is punished to the fullest extent of the law.

[Noblejanobii]

Failed a test I thought I did pretty well on. Just can't win in this chemistry class.

And the inevitable fallout with my mother has ensued. She's been yelling and screaming since yesterday about everything from me looking bored while studying to me texting my friends, but now she's so mad she's not even speaking to my dad or I. She and my dad had been sleeping together for a while which was cool to see because for the longest time they didn't so it was nice to see them sharing a bedroom again. But mom just went to the guest bedroom again so I guess that little happy time is over and done with. I feel like this is entirely my fault and the stress has undoubtedly triggered my growing migraine, but I don't really know what to do.

[Neo Emolga]

And the inevitable fallout with my mother has ensued. She's been yelling and screaming since yesterday about everything from me looking bored while studying to me texting my friends, but now she's so mad she's not even speaking to my dad or I. She and my dad had been sleeping together for a while which was cool to see because for the longest time they didn't so it was nice to see them sharing a bedroom again. But mom just went to the guest bedroom again so I guess that little happy time is over and done with. I feel like this is entirely my fault and the stress has undoubtedly triggered my growing migraine, but I don't really know what to do.

She just seems mad all the time, so don't take it personally. You know deep in your heart you're trying the best you can without burning out and that's all anyone can ask out of you. But it seems like she's never been able to understand that.