Noblejanobii
05-12-2016, 03:29 AM
The bell rang as four more people walked into the diner. The place was packed to the brim but there always seemed to be enough seats no matter how many customers came. It seemed like any other diner, nothing really special. Booths lined the walls, a bar was in the center next to the kitchen, and there was a jukebox by the door. The only thing that could be seen as a little odd was that there was only one waitress that seemed to be everywhere at once, and a cook that only left the kitchen at the end of everyone’s meals.
The four people walked to the nearest empty booth and sat down. The waitress lifted her head and was over at their table in an instant. She had long dark green hair pulled back into a ponytail with glimmering eyes. She was wearing a bright green dress and a white apron that complimented her wide smile.
“Welcome to the restaurant of Life and Death. How can I help you today? Here are your menus. Please signal for me when you are ready to order. I’ll tell you what the prices are and if you have any other questions please feel free to ask.” With that the waitress was gone. The four people glanced down at their menus, each blank until their eyes met the paper. Words scrawled onto the menus before them as options became available to them. The waitress was back before they knew it, a pad and pen ready to take their orders. “So what will it be?”
“Oh I’ll have a mechanical engineering degree please,” the first of the four spoke up. The other three stared at him, not even having realized that he had already made up his mind. The waitress quickly took down his order then anxiously looked at the other three.
“Uh… I’ll do an anthropology degree. And I’d like to order the Master’s Degree special please.” The waitress scribbled this down on her pad as the only female of the four spoke up.
“That will cost you two extra years,” the waitress informed the girl.
“That’s fine,” the girl answered, passing her menu to the waitress. The waitress nodded her head a little, finished writing, then looked at the other two men at the table.
“I think I’ll have the working dish,” one man said. The waitress frowned.
“Are you sure? That is our lowest satisfactory dish for everyone that can no longer order off the high school menu.” The man pondered this for a second then nodded again.
“Yes, I think I’ll have that. I can cancel my order, worse case.” The waitress glanced back at her pad and mumbled something as she wrote down the order. The guy wished he could cancel that order. The waitress looked back up at the last man. He had a pondering look on his face as he asked,
“I can't decide, what would you recommend? Business degree or should I chase my liberal arts fantasies?”
“I don't care which you pick,” the waitress replied. “I can come back later but it will cost you a year per visit that you wait to order. So hurry up, I've got other customers to visit.” The man’s eyes widened in panic and he glanced down at his menu.
“Liberal arts!” he finally shouted out. The waitress wrote it down then said quietly,
“Should have gone with business,” as she collected his menu. The waitress disappeared and the four people began to talk amongst themselves. It seemed like mere minutes to them as they enjoyed their dinner. The four seemed to age before each other’s eyes and when the waitress returned, it was as if six years had passed.
“Sorry for the wait. We just wanted to bring them all out at once. Here is your working order, your liberal arts degree, your engineering degree, and your anthropology master’s degree special. Would you like to look through our selection of spouses now?”
“Oh yes!” the anthropologist answers eagerly, accepting the menu from the waitress. The engineer shook his head and laughed.
“Always so desperate for a husband. I'll let the degree settle first then I'll take a look at your spouse menu.” The waitress gave the engineer an annoyed looked.
“That'll cost you two years per every trip you skip unless you opt for the Permanent Single option. That's free.”
“I'll take a menu too, see if I can find something up to my tastes,” the worker spoke up. The waitress handed him a menu and said,
“Don't make your order too complicated. It'll make the wait longer.” The liberal artist merely held out his hand and accepted a menu. He skimmed it briefly then said,
“I'll take the gay marriage plus two adopted children option.”
“Okay, but be careful. People who order that option tend to get fairly upset stomachs.” The liberal artist merely waved off the comment.
“I don't mind. I've got a strong stomach anyway.” The anthropologist raised her hand to get the waitress’s attention.
“I'll take the tall, dark, and handsome with a steady job.” The waitress took the anthropologist’s menu.
“That's what I got and I never regretted it,” she said with a wink, nodding her head towards the kitchen. The waitress looked between the other two occupants. “Any for you?”
“I'll wait,” said the engineer, offering the waitress back the menu.
“I'll have the soul mate option.” The waitress groaned at the worker and said,
“Okay, I don't know who started that rumor, but that is not served here. Try Love Casino down the street for that. I can give you the next best thing, the Love of Your Life special though.”
“Sounds like a good deal to me. I'll take it.” The waitress collected the menus and walked off. The sensation took over the four again as they aged without even noticing, just discussing all the fun times they had ever had. The waitress returned before they were all ready for her with three plates.
“Okay here are your spouses. For those of you with spouses, I have brought you the “Rest of Your Life” menus.” The waitress looked back at the engineer. The man was about to say something when his watch beeped. At the same time, the cook exited the kitchen and walked up to the table.
“I apologize,” the engineer said, “it appears I have to attend to something. I hope to see you all again soon.” The engineer took the cook’s hand and allowed himself to be escorted out the door. The group continued to talk as if it had never happened. They ordered their jobs, their kids, and their grandkids. The rest of the three made it through the night and was satisfied with their meals when they were done. The cook visited their table when they were done to collect their checks and one by one he escorted them out of the door.
When the three finally left the restaurant, as reluctant to go as they were, they saw the engineer waiting for them outside. And as they reunited and began to walk away from the old diner, they saw another group of four friends walking to replace them. The anthropologist hesitated and asked her friends to wait for a bit. She ran back to the restaurant and walked up to the waitress.
“Yes? What are you doing back so soon?” the waitress asked the anthropologist.
“Give those four kids walking in right now a round of wisdom on us. They'll need it, I know it,” the anthropologist replied. The waitress smiled and nodded her head.
“Of course. Now go on, your friends are waiting.”
The four people walked to the nearest empty booth and sat down. The waitress lifted her head and was over at their table in an instant. She had long dark green hair pulled back into a ponytail with glimmering eyes. She was wearing a bright green dress and a white apron that complimented her wide smile.
“Welcome to the restaurant of Life and Death. How can I help you today? Here are your menus. Please signal for me when you are ready to order. I’ll tell you what the prices are and if you have any other questions please feel free to ask.” With that the waitress was gone. The four people glanced down at their menus, each blank until their eyes met the paper. Words scrawled onto the menus before them as options became available to them. The waitress was back before they knew it, a pad and pen ready to take their orders. “So what will it be?”
“Oh I’ll have a mechanical engineering degree please,” the first of the four spoke up. The other three stared at him, not even having realized that he had already made up his mind. The waitress quickly took down his order then anxiously looked at the other three.
“Uh… I’ll do an anthropology degree. And I’d like to order the Master’s Degree special please.” The waitress scribbled this down on her pad as the only female of the four spoke up.
“That will cost you two extra years,” the waitress informed the girl.
“That’s fine,” the girl answered, passing her menu to the waitress. The waitress nodded her head a little, finished writing, then looked at the other two men at the table.
“I think I’ll have the working dish,” one man said. The waitress frowned.
“Are you sure? That is our lowest satisfactory dish for everyone that can no longer order off the high school menu.” The man pondered this for a second then nodded again.
“Yes, I think I’ll have that. I can cancel my order, worse case.” The waitress glanced back at her pad and mumbled something as she wrote down the order. The guy wished he could cancel that order. The waitress looked back up at the last man. He had a pondering look on his face as he asked,
“I can't decide, what would you recommend? Business degree or should I chase my liberal arts fantasies?”
“I don't care which you pick,” the waitress replied. “I can come back later but it will cost you a year per visit that you wait to order. So hurry up, I've got other customers to visit.” The man’s eyes widened in panic and he glanced down at his menu.
“Liberal arts!” he finally shouted out. The waitress wrote it down then said quietly,
“Should have gone with business,” as she collected his menu. The waitress disappeared and the four people began to talk amongst themselves. It seemed like mere minutes to them as they enjoyed their dinner. The four seemed to age before each other’s eyes and when the waitress returned, it was as if six years had passed.
“Sorry for the wait. We just wanted to bring them all out at once. Here is your working order, your liberal arts degree, your engineering degree, and your anthropology master’s degree special. Would you like to look through our selection of spouses now?”
“Oh yes!” the anthropologist answers eagerly, accepting the menu from the waitress. The engineer shook his head and laughed.
“Always so desperate for a husband. I'll let the degree settle first then I'll take a look at your spouse menu.” The waitress gave the engineer an annoyed looked.
“That'll cost you two years per every trip you skip unless you opt for the Permanent Single option. That's free.”
“I'll take a menu too, see if I can find something up to my tastes,” the worker spoke up. The waitress handed him a menu and said,
“Don't make your order too complicated. It'll make the wait longer.” The liberal artist merely held out his hand and accepted a menu. He skimmed it briefly then said,
“I'll take the gay marriage plus two adopted children option.”
“Okay, but be careful. People who order that option tend to get fairly upset stomachs.” The liberal artist merely waved off the comment.
“I don't mind. I've got a strong stomach anyway.” The anthropologist raised her hand to get the waitress’s attention.
“I'll take the tall, dark, and handsome with a steady job.” The waitress took the anthropologist’s menu.
“That's what I got and I never regretted it,” she said with a wink, nodding her head towards the kitchen. The waitress looked between the other two occupants. “Any for you?”
“I'll wait,” said the engineer, offering the waitress back the menu.
“I'll have the soul mate option.” The waitress groaned at the worker and said,
“Okay, I don't know who started that rumor, but that is not served here. Try Love Casino down the street for that. I can give you the next best thing, the Love of Your Life special though.”
“Sounds like a good deal to me. I'll take it.” The waitress collected the menus and walked off. The sensation took over the four again as they aged without even noticing, just discussing all the fun times they had ever had. The waitress returned before they were all ready for her with three plates.
“Okay here are your spouses. For those of you with spouses, I have brought you the “Rest of Your Life” menus.” The waitress looked back at the engineer. The man was about to say something when his watch beeped. At the same time, the cook exited the kitchen and walked up to the table.
“I apologize,” the engineer said, “it appears I have to attend to something. I hope to see you all again soon.” The engineer took the cook’s hand and allowed himself to be escorted out the door. The group continued to talk as if it had never happened. They ordered their jobs, their kids, and their grandkids. The rest of the three made it through the night and was satisfied with their meals when they were done. The cook visited their table when they were done to collect their checks and one by one he escorted them out of the door.
When the three finally left the restaurant, as reluctant to go as they were, they saw the engineer waiting for them outside. And as they reunited and began to walk away from the old diner, they saw another group of four friends walking to replace them. The anthropologist hesitated and asked her friends to wait for a bit. She ran back to the restaurant and walked up to the waitress.
“Yes? What are you doing back so soon?” the waitress asked the anthropologist.
“Give those four kids walking in right now a round of wisdom on us. They'll need it, I know it,” the anthropologist replied. The waitress smiled and nodded her head.
“Of course. Now go on, your friends are waiting.”