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Tired.

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AD
, 09-04-2019 at 05:27 AM (4207 Views)
That word, ive been saying it a lot lately. I am tired. Im tired.
"Oh then go to sleep"
"Oh drink some coffee to wake you up"
"It is 5pm, ear a pancake you sod"
"You dont know what tired is"

Yea. I mean, i guess you can use the word tired for the sense of lack of sleep. I dont sleep, so yea, im physically tired. Ive barely slept for tbe past 14 years. I have perminant bags under my eyes. Bur that isnt the tired im refering to. I am probably going to misspell a bunch of crap here, i might go back and edit them correctly when im in tbe right frame of mind but atm, i dont give a crap.

I am tired. So. So. Tired. Tired of listening to people around me, judging me for being unmotivated/lazy. I am tired of friends or family critiquing everything i do. I am so tired of having this weight on my chest. I am honestly tired of living at times, but suicide is a cop out and i aint no ho. This world beats you down so hard, it tries to drag you down with it, and this air is exhausting. I look forward to better times.


I am emotionally drained. I am physically tired yes, but my emotions are just so absolutely exhausted that it is difficult to fake a smile nowadays. I just want to scream. I am getting so aggitated and angry lately because i am fed up.

I know everyone is depressed. I know everyone is tired. But dammit, i want a word in. Stop looking at me with that condescending face when i talk. My life isnt a joke, you stressful turd waffles. My brain may not be able to form sentences properly at times, but that is because I AM TIRED. DONE. NO FVCKS GIVEN. Im tired. Damn.


And this has been a rant by a stressed out boi. You dont have to say things, i just needed to vent. Venting is a helpful way to cope.

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Comments

  1. Lychee's Avatar
    I trust you've tried all the usual things, so all I can say is get well soon! I hope you can feel bright and full of motivation and excitement asap! Your wellbeing is important.
  2. Neo Emolga's Avatar
    DO MORE OF WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

    The times I've been the happiest were when I was doing something weird, crazy, a little brazen, and things I thought I would get into trouble for, but things actually turned out beautifully and became things I got renown for.

    Also, I saw this today and it was actually quite refreshing:

    Spoiler:
  3. Scytherwolf's Avatar
    I've definitely felt the same way at times. Tired but it's not really about needing sleep. I agree with Neo. I'm happiest when I'm working on creative projects and/or doing something fun. Without the creative stuff I don't know where I'd be.
  4. Chakramaster's Avatar
    And this is just the place to cope. Blogs help get things out you may normally not be able to. So vent away!

    Sometimes life hits us and tugs is down. Hard. Making us all feel like total crap. There's no sugarcoating that. I wish it were so, but it really isn't.

    As tough as it is. Don't let others negative words get to you. It'll only make things worse. Try to focus on more positive feelings and things you enjoy. Have certain music you like? Put it all on a loop while you go online or do work. Certain movie or games you enjoy? Same thing! Give them a play and have a good time.

    Sleep may not be the only thing. It could be a mix of much more. If there's anything you've been holding in it could be a total stress reliever getting it all out. So this is a good first step to getting part of that weight out.

    If there's anything you don't feel comfortable talking about out in public and need someone to talk to more personally. Feel free to drop me a PM. But take some time for yourself. Don't let someone else control your life and don't let the negativity of others get to you.