Tri-Kappa Labs

[Suicune's Fire]

Had I not heard the gunshots mere minutes ago, I could have sworn there was nothing wrong.

I was under the impression that the gunshots happened seconds ago, rather than minutes. A minute is a long time in these situations. If you meant minutes, I would suggest specifying so that we're aware of the time.

Bang! Bang! Bang! I spun around as I heard a loud banging against the front door downstairs.

"spun" and "span" are still words I get mixed up, but the correct term in this sentence should be "span." The use of "spun" would only be appropriate in the case of past tense, past participle. For instance, "she had spun around," but "she span around." So the addition of "had" changes it form "span" to "spun." The same rules apply to "swam" and "swum."

"Open up!" A loud masculine voice yelled, "You are now under the rule of the Greek Riders!

I noticed in later chapters that you have the same understanding of grammar in speech as what you display here, so I'm going to go ahead and teach you a bit about it. (Sorry if that sounded horribly condescending; I didn't mean for that at all.)

With speech, you have to look at it like it's a continual part of the sentence you're writing--because it is. Therefore, you need to use commas and capitals as if there were no quotations around the speech at all. This should be:

"Open up!" a loud masculine voice yelled. "You are now under the rule of the Green Riders!"

See the lowercase 'a' I put in there? And then the full stop at the end of "yelled"? Regardless of an exclamation mark or a question mark at the end of speech, unless it's the end of the sentence, then the following words which aren't part of the speech must have a lowercase and be a continuing sentence. If it's not a ! or a ? then you need a comma, and NOT a period. A period is only to be used at the end of speech if it marks the end of a sentence. I'll make some examples for you from the next chapter (and I'm putting an end quotations on the end for simplicity).

"Yeah." I said, "Job wise at least."

See how the period at the end of "yeah" cuts off the sentence? You should switch around the comma and the period so it looks like this:

"Yeah," I said. "Job wise at least."

Or, if you wanted it to continue as one sentence, have two commas and a lowercase J for "job."

"Yeah," I said, "job wise at least."

Do you see how that works? And if you were to use a word that wasn't a proper noun following the "Yeah," then it'd be a lowercase. Like this:

"Yeah," said the girl, "job wise at least."

If this doesn't make much sense, then try removing the quotations. If you have the period after "yeah" then it's a fragmented sentence, right? Because it's like sticking a random period in the middle of a regular sentence. I hope this all makes sense. :]

We are collecting tributes under the age of 25

In stories, especially in speech, you need to write out numbers as words.

Planning my jump, I failed to notice another person standing on the ground maybe twenty below me. That was a fatal mistake on my part.

I'm having a slight issue with this sentence. The story is from first-person perspective, right, but this implies that she is telling a story that already happened, rather than living it as it is written. If it was from third-person then it would make more sense, but right now, I'm not sure what the style is and if she's telling it back to us or not.

The whole "telling the story back" idea through first person would explain why there was a little bit of a lack of emotions, I felt, in this first chapter. It was also extremely short. I felt like you could have had more of an intro to the character before jumping into the action, although action is always good too. I wanted to know more about what the character was feeling, as it felt a little 'telling' and not 'showing'. I do like your writing style, however, and it's so nice to see another story on PXR! There's been a severe lack of ongoing stories here, so I definitely hope to see this one continue.

I'm keen to read more, and I'm so sorry to took me so long to post this review! I've only read one chapter and a bit of chapter two, and after I've read more, I'll be able to give a more detailed recount of my opinions. :]

[Noblejanobii]

@Suicune's Fire
Ok I'm going to try and answer this in the same order you did but I'm not going to be quoting you because that'll be overwhelming and time consuming on my phone.

1) In regards to the whole minutes thing, you have to understand the concept of time. It didn't take her seconds to jump from her bed, make her way across the room, and get to the window then look around. Someone would have to have like super speed (which Shayla lacks). Therefore, it would be minutes because these actions do take time therefore minutes would be the correct term here, not seconds.

2) I have never heard of this before so this is new to me. Thank you for the correction.

3) I have also never heard of this grammatical error either. I'll fix that as well.

4) I tend to write in a form that people would speak. this means that it is not always grammatically correct. It contains fragments and odd sentences all around. This is how people around me talk so this is how I write how people speak.

5) I have a habit of switching between number and letter form when writing numbers. It's a habit that I am trying to break but sometimes I slip up.

6) I am uncomfortable in writing in present tense. My writing does not flow as well that way. My sentences become choppy and chapters become significantly shorter with a lot less descriptiveness. I tried for several years to write in present tense but I was not improving at all. In fact I became worse. My english teacher last year recommended I try past tense instead. This, in my opinion as well as those of the english teachers around school, believe that it flows much better now, as well as allows for some flexibility. She's telling in the first person which allows for me to include emotions and personal thoughts but it's in past tense so it flows better. It is my writing style and I like it so I doubt I will change it any time soon.

7) As for the short first chapter, when I write stories, I tend to try to hook readers with the first chapter. I make it short, sweet, and suspenseful, which tends to draw people in. Then I flesh out everything in the following chapters. Never have I read a book where an author tells you everything about the character in the first chapter. That tends to take away from the mystery. I introduce my characters piece by piece so that while you may not know them at all within the first chapters, you'll be learning about them the entire story.

NOTE: If I ever seen rude when I am responding to criticisms I apologize. I don't mean to sound rude, but I'm not used to be criticized. Most people that read my stories for some odd reason love them. It is only this year that I've actually been challenged in my writing skills. That being said, I'm not always sure how to respond to corrective criticism. I am thankful for all writing tips since I do plan to make my living on writing and the more tips I get the better I will be.

[Suicune's Fire]

No worries. :] I'll do that too because it's easier even on a computer. xD And I'll leave the response black so it's easier to read, ahaha.

1. Oh, I do understand the concept of time. What I was saying is that there wasn't a clearly specified amount of time in the story in order for us to understand where everything is. For instance, my bed is literally right beside my window so it would take me seconds to get there, and I don't have super speed. xD The thing is, you described it in such a short number of words that there's no way we could tell that it took minutes. If you described it in a lot more detail and made it clear how long it took, then I'd understand it taking minutes. I'm not trying to tell you that it only took her seconds; I'm just saying that with the way it's currently laid out, it's hard to grasp how much time went by. There is no way that "I got out of bed and walked to the nearest window" is going to tell us how long it took her, or how quiet she was trying to be, or how scared she was while she was doing it, or maybe the deliberation when she was trying to make the decision to move or not, etc. All I'm saying is, clarity makes everything better. :]

2. No worries! Trust me, I have had issues upon issues with "swam" and "swum" and all similar words. xD You're not alone.

3. No worries. I also had no clue about it when I first started posting stories online until someone from the old pokemon forum explained it to me. x)

4. I understand that, but there's a difference between writing out intonation and using correct, absolute grammar in certain places--like at the end of the sentence. All of those quotes were just me explaining my initial speech grammar point. x)

5. That's okay. ^^ I just wanted to remind you.

6. Ohhh, oh no, that's not what I meant at all. I HATE present tense. I find it horribly uncomfortable to write and to read. Past tense is still happening newly as the story progresses, though. In past tense, it's not a character looking back on the past and recounting events--that's not what it means, and I'm sure you know that. I'm stating that how could a person know without hindsight what was about to happen? It would be like me sitting here at my desk now, typing on my computer. How do I know that in five seconds, my bed could explode? I don't. Because it hasn't happened yet. So unless she's telling a story to someone after she's already lived it, then her knowing about the guy outside her window doesn't make sense. (Also I was talking about perspective, not tense, but tense is important too. xD)

7. That's also not what I meant. xD I just meant maybe an indication of her personality, what she looks like, or how she thinks. I don't mean give away her backstory. xD I just mean surface things as a character introduction.

Sorry if my review was confusing; I think a lot of things I said came across as unclear and were easy to misinterpret. I hope I cleared some things up in this response though. And don't worry, I didn't think you were rude. x) I have been reviewing people's pokemon stories online for years and years now, so I've heard all sorts of responses when I've reviewed stories. I always quote every error I find so I can help the author improve and so that specific errors can be ironed out. Trust me, I'd only do this to help. I feel bad when I read people's stories and don't point out the errors, because then how is one supposed to improve? But anyway, I'm glad you found it helpful. Don't worry--I didn't mean that I don't like your writing! It really did draw me in despite my corrections, so don't worry about that. :] A few sentences in, I could already tell that you were a good writer.

Anyway, I hope to get around to more of it soon. x) The concept sounds really cool so far. Please don't be discouraged by anything I say. :] I do truly only mean to help you improve!

[Noblejanobii]

1. That's true. And actually in my room, I can look out my window without even sitting up in my bed so I was a bit iffy with that descriptiveness. Like I said elsewhere I tend to keep the first chapter of a story short but also try to hook someone in so a lot of descriptiveness doesn't come in until the second chapter.

2. Like I didn't even know that span (in this definition) was a word. Like I knew time span but I have never ever heard someone say that before. Like I have a guy who narrates his actions and he says spun all the time.

3. It doesn't help that the device I usually type this on (my phone) autocorrects it. That's also why there are some weird wording errors sometimes (like I know there's one when Sloane is talking in chapter 3) because my phone autocorrects it.

4. Oh yeah and thanks for that! I appreciate all correction. I was just explaining that this is the dialect I'm used to so I feel more comfortable writing in this form. However when people are from different cultures I try to change the dialect to fit them but usually I fail at it.

5. Yes thank you. I need to stop doing that. Now sometimes I find it's justified. One example I can give is if they said like "He is a Generation 3." That's like an experiment number so I feel like in that case it would be ok because it's like a title. But in the case you're talking about you're absolutely right.

6. Oh! I completely missed that! Yeah I understand what you mean now. To be honest I can't remember why I added that. Possibly to create more suspense or something. I wrote that at like 3 am though so who knows what I was thinking.

7. Right right. Like I said before I generally just try to hook people in the first chapter then introduce you to everyone in the second and following chapters. I'm not sure why to be honest but it's what I've always done.

Well thank you! And what I meant was like if I'm having a bad day I tend to snap at people, especially critics. I was actually know on another website many years ago for cursing out a critic when they just caught me on a really bad day. Also, expect that chapter 5 will still have some of these errors because I've been writing it for a while and I don't catch everything. Chapter 6 will be better, I promise.

[Suicune's Fire]

1. Yeah, and, I mean, she could have a large gap between her bed and her window, but I don't know. Yeah, that makes sense. Still, a few tiny details can sometimes make all the difference. x)

2. Yep. xD I think it's not as commonly used as spun. Maybe 'spun' is correct in both cases... I dunno. My dictionary thinks it's "archaic" so I suppose that means not many people use it anymore. In that case, I'm wrong. xD

3. Nuuuuuu! You write stories on your phone? So you don't have, say, Word documents and such? Ooh girl... I would very strongly recommend against that! D: And using PXR on phones is a pain, I find. xD I never use mobile versions of sites because they're lame, but then when I use the regular version, it's harder to navigate and do anything. XD

4. No worries! And yeah, whatever dialect and accents is fine. xD I just mean grammar. :] And nuu, I'm sure you don't fail! It's not easy sometimes anyway. x) Try not to be too hard on yourself.

5. Yes, I think that's justified. x) I've been told that long numbers aren't necessary to type out, but yeah, something like "it was twenty five metres from the door" definitely requires typing out. In the case of an experiment, yeah, I think the number is fine. x)

6. Ah okay. XD No worries! I like to raise points to make people think sometimes.

7. That's okay. ^^ Even if I give you something to think about, that's all I really aim for. :D

No worries. 8D Oh wow, really? xD That's not good! Thinking about it though, it sounds like a good character flaw. xD Are you gonna go back and edit the errors? That's what I intended, as well as taking what I say for the future. I've edited chapters so many times...ahaha. And hey, even though I correct people's stories all the time, I always miss errors of my own in my writing. xD Always. It's like I'm immune to their corruptible charms. XD

[Noblejanobii]

1. Right. When I have time I'll go back and shape up chapter 1. I want to get the next chapter up first though. That's my main priority though.

2. Well it's definitely something that I need to know and I'll be more careful in the future about it.

3. Oh I do have word, but on my computer. The reason I do it on my phone is because I have inspiration strike at the oddest times, usually like 1-2am, and I don't have access to a computer then. Because I have my phone on my person 24/7, it's just more convient for me. However, I can access the stories on my computer through my email so some parts are typed on my computer but not all.

4. Well other dialects and accents are just hard so I usually do pretty bad with them.

5. I was told that from 100 up, you can do numbers. But anything below that has to be typed out.

6. Yes and it is something that will more than likely be helpful to me in the future.

7. Well you've achieved that goal.

Oh I totally plan to go back and make changes. I just want to get the next chapter out first. I probably won't be able to do much until like next Friday though because I have exams (in case you haven't seen me mention that before). But I do plan to go back and make some changes, I just have other priorities at that moment. And yeah, it's a pretty funny flaw sometimes but it makes me somewhat unpopular as a writer because i snap at people.

[Suicune's Fire]

1. Yeah, that sounds great. ^^ I have a few things to do today, but I plan to remain at home, so I'll see if I can read some more and review it too. :D I'll probably not comment on repeated errors (such as speech grammar) which I've already pointed out, but I might just do a reminder per chapter or something. xD We'll see!

2. Ah, that's okay. I mean, as important as grammar is, the importance of a decent story trumps it!

3. Ahh well that's great! I like that phones have the capability to help with random inspiration strikes. xD Personally I have difficulty typing on my phone most of the time (and autocorrect makes me fume) so I always try to keep my fingers on a keyboard. xD

4. I think accents are pretty subjective in a story. To be honest, I often get a little frustrated when people make major speech changes to cater for an accent. I do, however, like simple things like cutting out words or alternate word arrangement (i.e. "How you do today?") or apostrophes in the place of a g in a word ending with "ing" (i.e. "Are we playin' soon?") and also condensed phrases like "going to" into "gonna" or "want to" into "wanna." So yeah...accent stuff isn't too crucial, I don't think. x) It's hard to write an accent.

5. That makes sense. x) I suppose it's up to preference once the numbers climb.

6. Okay, that's good. :D

7. That is also good! XD

I think that's a good plan. Absolutely! Take your time. x) No rushes here. And haha, well, if I ever see you snap at me, I'll take it as a bad day and not hold it against you. XD

[Noblejanobii]

1. Yes like I said, chapter 6 will be the chapter where you'll see changes most likely. I'll go back and edit the five once I've post all five but chapter 6 will automatically have the fixes.

2. True. Plot before romance as my friends and I say. Unless the romance is part of the plot.

3. I can type just as effectively on both. I actually type more accurately on a computer and can type without looking at the keyboard. I can do that on a phone too but it is just less accurate not too mention the autocorrect often corrects at the worst moments. Still, it is helpful sometimes. But it works out since I can access it from both I can use one platform if I lack access to the other.

4. Yeah. You probably won't see much here when it comes to accents or stuff like that. I try to make people sound a bit different though so they may talk differently but beyond that you won't see much unless I deem it necessary.

5. Yeah I guess.

Well I tend to have a habit of abandoning stories and such if I feel like it's not worth working on. whether this means it's too much work or not enough support I tend to drop them so I'm trying to not do that with this one because I actually have fans for once. And yes, please do. I never try to be mean to someone, it just happens.

[Noblejanobii]

Tri-Kappa Labs
Chapter 5

6 years prior…

A short thirteen year old boy shuffled forward, his eyes cast towards the ground, and his arms cuffed behind his back. Long black hair hung in his face, hatred burning in his bright blue eyes. Blood trickled down his fingertips from where the plastics cuffs had cut into his wrists. However, the boy did not care. Why should he? Anything was better than death by hanging. Anything, or so he thought.

I can remember only so far back. What they did to me did destroy some of my memories, but the rest, what they did to me, and what they did to those I knew, all still burn bright inside of my mind. As I grow older the memories from further back begin to fade, so I struggle to remember something from when I was only thirteen. But I will do my best to recount it.

The boy was shoved roughly into a cold solid white room by the guard behind him. He was forced into the chair and cuffed to it. The boy growled at the guard and strained against his cuffs, but it only cut into his wrists more, which made the guard smirk as blood continued to pour from the boy's body. The guard licked his lips and fangs were barely visible. A shiver crawled up the boy's spine at that and he froze as the guard smiled, fangs peeking out from over his lips.

"What are you?" The boy whispered. The guard only chuckled and did not answer. The door on the other side of the room opened and a tall man stepped in. He was bald, not a speck of hair on his head. Large frameless glasses encircled his beady black eyes. His nose was large, twitching ever so slightly and the man appeared to have… were those rat whiskers? He was dressed in a large white lab coat, khakis, and a white shirt. His shoes were black and meant for church not for a lab. The man leaned into the table, his unnaturally long nails clicking as each one hit the tabletop. The man smiled at the boy and asked,

"A delinquent?"

"I'm not delinquent." The boy replied sourly.

"Your record says otherwise. It claims you murdered three people." The man said.

"I was framed!" The boy snapped, straining against his chair. Suddenly white hot electricity began to course through his body. The boy stiffened and cried out in pain, his body stretching unnaturally to try and escape the pain. Finally the pain stopped and the boy slumped back into his chair, eyes barely open. The man shook his finger at the boy with a crooked smile on his face.

"Now now, there is no need for that. I am merely here to help you."

"I don't need any help."

"Oh I think you do. Being sentenced to hanging is not a positive ordeal you see. I can guarantee you won't come out of it alive. With me, however, you can achieve great things and I can make all your pains disappear with the flick of a finger."

I will admit that at the time, the deal seemed very tempting. I mean, I had been framed for the murder of three people, not to mention the electricity that had just been shot through me and the cuffs that were going to be cutting into my bones by the time the ordeal was over. Having someone take that all away… it was something that I couldn't just refuse. Despite that one part of me saying something was off about this, I continued on towards my doom.

"If you can make my pains disappear, then yeah I'll help you." The boy said. The man smiled with a devilish sort of look.

"Excellent." He said with a chuckle in his voice. The hairs began to rise on the back of the boy's neck. He started to ask a question but the words froze in his throat as a needle was jammed into his neck. A liquid was emptied from the syringe into the boy's bloodstream. His eyes slowly closed and he was unconscious soon enough.

I don't know what happened while I was unconscious. Time had to have passed but I couldn't tell you how much or what they had done to me. All I can remember is the extreme pain I felt while I was swimming through the darkness that was my drugged mind. Fire seemed to be consuming my entire body from the inside out. My body was changing, marking appearing on my arms, legs, and back. My hair changed from a jet black to the blue it is now. Soon enough, fire would escape my lips if I was angry enough. When I woke up, time had passed, but I'll never know exactly how much. I just know it was a long time, several years probably, because I went in as a thirteen year old, and when I came out I was seventeen.

The now young man's body fell from where it was being held up. His bright blue eyes were clouded over like the sky on a foggy day. His mind was still numbed from the drugs he had been fed while he was being experimented on. He barely registered the small prick of pain that tingled from his neck when a needle was pushed in. The syringe dumped its contents into the young man's body, then he was dragged away from the lab. The syringe's fluids made the young man feel even worse, even more numb, and it gave him the urge to just let go of his mind. But he didn't like that. Somewhere inside his body, the spark of fight that lived inside his mind attacked the mind-controlling fluids that had entered this man's body. It subdued them and the subject now became a glitch.

Awareness began to filter through the boy's mind and his eyes opened a little wider. He began to scan his surroundings curiously, wondering where he was... or who he was. There was only one thing he knew for sure, he was not supposed to be this aware. He was supposed to be in a numb state, but he wasn't. The young man decided to act just as he was supposed to be, a mindless drone. The guards continued to drag him down the long silver metal hallways until they reached a long corridor lined with black doors. They took him to one that had the number 310 on it. A guard caught the young man's face and said in a robotic voice,

"You are now Grunt 310. Stay in your quarters and await further orders." With that the guards opened the doors and threw the young man inside. He slid across the metal ground and hit the wall on the other side of the room. He bit back any signs of pain he felt. No doubt there were cameras in this place and any sign that he wasn't what he was supposed to be could bust him. He stood up slowly, trying to make his movements look controlled. He observed his room making notes that there was only a bed and a toilet, but that the lights in the ceiling most likely contained cameras.

I remember that it felt like hours passed. All I did was sit on my bed and occasionally get up to use the bathroom. That was it. I knew I needed to act my part as the drone but as time when on it became harder for me to resist the urge to explore. That is when it hit me. They were testing me. A drone would not explore. Someone with awareness would. With that realization, I just let my mind wander. I think I fell asleep at some point in time. All I can remember next is getting into the groove.

The young man opened his eyes as a low pitched buzzing filled his ears. He sat up slowly and turned his head towards the door. The door slid open as he stood up. A guard motioned for the young man to follow him. They walked down the long corridor to what seemed to be a training area. The young man held back his shock at the sheer amount of people... if that is what they could be called in the area. He wasn't sure they were people though. They were flying, bending water, some controlling the earth, while others manipulated the shadows. It was mind boggling and it took every ounce of the young man's restraint to not show any signs of his emotions. The guard led the young man through the room to the center where a woman stood. Her back was to them currently and she was conversing with another man. They turned to face us when the guard cleared his throat.

The woman was tall but the young man suspected that a large portion of her height might be due to the fact that her red heels were several inches tall. She was dressed in all red, orange, and yellow. She had a red short dress that barely covered what it needed to cover, an orange belt strapped around her waist. Her skin was white like snow, which was somewhat amusing to the young man, because she seemed to represent fire yet she had the quality of ice on her. Her hair was a bright orange, done up so that it looked like a rising flame and added to the tall appearance. Her lips were lush, large, and bright red. The young man found them disgusting. Lips that large only meant that this woman was no virgin and the young boy had a sneaky suspicion as to whom she was selling herself to. But her yellow eyes hidden under her red shades gave no signal as to this side of her. This woman was well guarded and she was powerful. The young man could feel her power from the aura around her, but he felt that most of it came from the two gems that hung around her neck. They had unique patterns, one blue and black, the other yellow and orange. These two gems held the young man's interest, but he forced himself to not look at them and instead focus on the man now.

The aura around him was filled with the chills, the opposite of the woman. His hair was spiked and solid black like the young man's had once been. He was tall, taller than the woman and had a skin tone that, ironically, suggested he spent much of his time in the heat. Everything else about the man was white or blue. His long flowing robes were white and blue, the colors of ice. His shoes were also blue. His breath was white like ice as well. The man had sunglasses over his eyes and the young man had a suspicion as to why his eyes needed to be hidden.

"Is he the newest one?" The woman finally asked after several minutes of silence had passed. The guard grunted.

"He is. Also, he was a delinquent in a past life." The guard added.

"Oh? What was he convicted for?"

"Murder." The woman began to laugh with glee.

"My favorite kind of crime." She said. The man smirked.

"Now now, Hyrella, I thought I was your favorite crime." He said. The woman, Hyrella, smiled lustfully at the man.

"Oh but Hyoto, you are on a whole other level than what I am talking about." The guard cleared his throat again and interrupted the creepy conversation, much to the relief of the young man.

"Where shall he be placed?" The guard asked.

"What kind of a gijinka is he?" Hyoto asked in return.

"Quilava, grunt level." The guard replied.

"Combat experience?" Hyrella asked.

"He was a second degree black belt in Taekwondo and a red belt in Karate. He also fought in some mixed martial arts fights." The guard answered. The young man put this information in a file in his brain. This might be important someday. The mentions of these martial arts did bring some of his forms and moves back to the surface of his mind for now, but the faces were blurred out of his memories.

"Put him in the level 3 class." The two admins said at the same time. The guard nodded with a grunt and lead the young man to an elevator. They went up three floors then exited to a training area. Here it appeared the grunt gijinkas were training in stamina and speed. The guard shoved the young man into one of the training areas where he was met with yet another aware gijinka. This one had the rank of Mellem, the rank between Ace Grunt and Rookie Admin. The young man gazed at the Mellem, trying to discern the gijinka he was.

His hair was a blue green, a yellow band tying back the long locks from handing in his face. He was tall, almost seven feet if the young man had to guess. His skin was dark like the Mellem had lived in the tropics for most of his life. He was also shirtless. A green cloth that looked like the lower half of a toga covered him from the waist down, and the young man could not see the Mellem's feet. The Mellem's eyes were brown like wet soil. Golden jewelry covered him where it could. He had an ornate necklace, different patterns and such carved into the gold. The necklace started halfway down his neck wrapping like a serpent around it. Then, when it reached the top of his torso, it swept out into a wave like shape with stars, Suns, and other patterns carved into it, and in some places these patterns were cut into the metal so deeply that it showed the brown of the Mellem's skin. It stopped just before it hit his mid chest, but small gold chains hung down further, jingling as he moved. He also had various bracelets on his arms, at least three on each, along with a long golden chain ear ring hanging from his left ear. Black tattoos covered his brown skin as well, covering him with images that perplexed the young man, for he was unsure of their true meaning.

"This is your latest grunt. Test his abilities. The admins want to see how strong he is." The guard said gruffly.

"Another delinquent?" The Mellem guessed with a resigned look on his face.

"Yes. Convicted for the murder of three."

"Maybe we should let him visit the Hanging Tree." The Mellem joked. It fell flat with the guard leaving the Mellem to be the only one laughing. He quickly stopped and took the young man's arm. "What is his title?"

"He has not been assigned one yet. Currently his incomplete title is Tri since he is part of the Tri-Generation. When we figure out his level he will be given a full title."

With that the guard left and the Mellem frowned. He shook his head and looked at the young man. His eyes scanned over him quietly then said,

"You hold great potential. My name is Obranzy." The young man just stared at his superior. Obranzy narrowed his eyes and looked over the young man again. He pursed his lips then cast a glance over his shoulder. The young man started to follow Obranzy's gaze but Obranzy suddenly grabbed the young man's arm. "Come with me." He said quietly, pulling the young man out of the training area and into a smaller room, a storage closet if the young man had to guess. Obranzy made sure the door was locked so no one else could come in, then he faced the young man. "You don't play the role of a mindless being very well." Obranzy said. The young man bit his tongue hard to prevent himself from reacting, but Obranzy wasn't convinced. "You keep a still body and face very well, but your emotions are reflected in your eyes. They give you away. You need to train yourself to act like everyone else." The young man let out a sigh. He knew his cover was blown.

"I'm new to this. I didn't exactly train to be a mindless zombie when I was growing up." The young man drew his brows together and frowned. "I don't think I did at least. I can't really remember." Obranzy nodded and sighed.

"Ah, you're a Grade 2 resistance." He said. When the young man gave him a perplexed look, Obranzy chuckled. "You don't become mindless but you do lose many of your memories. The more they inject you with that serum the more memories you lose." Obranzy saw the pain of the sentence sink in and he put his hand firmly on the young man's shoulder. "Don't worry. All you have to remember is that the Greek Riders are not the good guys." The young man nodded in response, his mind still trying to process all of this. All his thoughts were whirling around, moving too fast for him to grasp even a single syllable. Still, the young man knew that this Obranzy might be his only chance to get out of here alive.

"If it means if I survive this Hell, then I'll listen to you."

From there on, Obranzy and I made an alliance. Obranzy would train me to act like the other mindless and I would work to focus on holding onto my memories. It was a long time before tragedy struck. By the time it hit us, neither of us saw it coming. We became cocky, thinking our covers were full proof. What we didn't realize is that those on the Level Omega could see right through those of us on Level Gamma. Despite all my training, my costume wasn't good enough. My eyes were my weakness, they are my weakness, and because of them, I lost my only friend.

The young man turned and froze in place when he saw that guards were headed straight towards Obranzy. They grabbed him from behind and quickly had cuffs on him and a gun to his head.

"What is the meaning of this?" Obranzy yelled as he was dragged to the center of the room where all could see him. Now everyone in the room had stopped what they were doing and was watching Obranzy with the guards.

"Obranzy Teleski, you have been placed under arrest for harboring traitors. The penalty for your crime is death. However, your sentence can be lowered if you point out all of the Awares to us." The guard said, rattling off his whole speech in a robot-like fashion. Obranzy didn't move, he didn't look up, he didn't look anywhere. He just sat very still. Both of us knew that if he moved even a little bit he would give away those of us that he was protecting.

The young man stood very still, trying to keep his body under control. This was hard for him and he knew he wasn't the only one straining to keep their emotions under control. The young man was well aware that other gijinkas like him had been protected by Obranzy. He had no idea who they were, but he knew that they were here, in this crowd, and they were struggling too.

Silence held tight over the training area. Tension crawled over every individual and no one dared to move lest all of Hell break free. However, despite everyone's fears, the click of a gun echoed throughout the hall as the guard put it on Obranzy's temple and prepared to shoot. Obranzy didn't seem to be phased by the cold metal pressed against his head. He was the bravest man in the room and had probably known this would happen eventually. He had probably trained himself everyday to not like his emotions show when the day of his demise would come. Now, it had come and his training was paying off for him. Finally his mouth twitched upward at the corners and Obranzy gave a small smile.

"You people know no loyalty. You treat humans like trash and as experiments, killing those who won't listen to you. But one day those who don't listen to you will be your fall! The Greek Riders will meet their end and I will be laughing from the edge of Purgatory as all of your souls burn in-" A shudder ran up the young man's spine as he watched the bullet enter Obranzy's skull. His eyes were glassy by the time his body had hit the floor. Everyone was very still, not one lung breathed and not one muscle twitched. Fear had its grip on the hall and it was suffocating each individual. The guard swept his gaze over the crowd observing the ordeal. Occasionally he would slow in his sweep, and the young man felt himself almost choke when the guard made eye contact with him.

"Soldiers," the guard growled to those following him, "seize the Awares." The soldiers began to weed their way through the crowd in different directions. Everyone was frozen until a girl's scream scrapped against the wall of the training hall, followed by the sound of a gun shot. That's when everything Obranzy had taught the Awares went out the window. The young man along with many others began to make a break for it, dashing for the doors for some way out. At first, a glimmer of hope spread through them as they approached the doors. But then that hope died as quickly as it came, the training hall going into lockdown mode. Large metal sheets closed down over every window, door, or potential escape route. More screams, male and female, went up throughout the crowd, gunshots soon following the screams. Many of the Awares began to bang on the metal sheets, trying to find or beat a way through, but it was no use. The soldiers had cornered them and they were all dead meat.

The young man bit his lip as his back hit the cold metal of the lockdown door sheets. He knew that he was dead meat now, as well as the roughly twenty others that stood with him. Dozens of corpses laid on the ground on the other side of the wall of soldiers. Slowly, the young man felt rage begin to boil within his stomach. It began to rise up and hit his heart before pumping through his veins into the rest of his body. His next breath gave a little spark of fire. He was seething, angry that Obranzy was dead, angry that they had made him lose his memories, and angry that this company had made him into a monster. Well, if they wanted a monster, they were going to get one.

The young man took in a deep breath, his lungs heating up the air inside of his body before he unleashed it in a large whoosh of flames. The soldiers retreated a little, not having expected someone to fight back. The other Awares seemed to have a similar reaction, but already being pressed against a wall made it hard for them to retreat. The young man growled and released another breath of flames, burning some of the soldiers. With each breath that he released, the flames grew brighter and brighter, symbolizing they were getting hotter. It wasn't until his flames were white that the soldiers finally regained their senses.

I should have been a lead sculpture right then. I was waiting, waiting to be lit up like a Christmas tree full of bullets. I heard the guns fire and for a second I thought I was dead. But then I opened my eyes and saw I wasn't.

The young man stared as bullets bounced off the shield that was being held up in front of him. Spikes shot out in all directions from the face of the shield, preventing the bullets from reaching the young man, as well as the young woman holding up the shield.

"Are you ok?" The woman asked, "It would be quite the moral crusher if the one guy who stood up against these guys got a body full of bullets." The young man smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, not a bullet grazed me thanks to your shield. Now, we need to find a way out of here." He turned and looked to the others. "Do you want freedom or slavery? We need to get out of here if we want to live! These guys can't take us! Sure they outnumber us be we can overpower them!"

I'm not much of a motivational speaker but somehow my sucky speech worked. The Awares started to fight back. We easily overpowered the soldiers and at first we started to celebrate until the admins showed up. That's when everything went downhill and that's when I became what I am today.

"Gamma soldiers! These people that you have witnessed fighting right now are your enemies! Incapacitate them immediately." The mindless gijinkas that had been standing still this entire time now began to move. At first, none of the Awares thought much of them, but then it began to dawn on them, one by one. The mindless outnumbered them five to one, and the mindless gijinkas had the same if not better powers than the Awares. The Awares stood no chance.

They overwhelmed us and took us down. We fought back but we couldn't stand a chance against the sleep powder. Apparently the serum we were resistant to gives the mindless resistance to that. The rest of us were out in a matter of seconds. After that… it's like a blank in my mind. I can't remember anything and no matter how hard I try, it's like I keep going in circles. I know things happened but I can't tell you what. I think it's possible they overwhelmed me with enough serum that I became a mindless too. I don't know that though. When I became Aware again, it was only about… I want to say a month ago, but it is hard to tell time when your mind is in a constant fog. When I became Aware again, I was still so much in a fog that I acted somewhat like everyone else. It was like that until you, Shayla. As soon as I saw that solar beam, the fog was gone. It had lifted from my mind and I could think clearly. Shayla, I owe you my life, and I promise to assist you in any way possible. The Greek Riders must fall. Of that, I am certain.

[Noblejanobii]

Alright! There is chapter 5! Right before my exams too. Lol, well to update, chapter 6 probably won't be up for a week or two because of exams. I also plan to correct some errors in the previous chapters to try and shape them up so that they appear better. I'll work on Chapter 6 when I can but for now my main priority is shaping up the other chapters.

Anyway, thanks for the comments and critiques everybody! All is appreciated and I promise Tri-Kappa Labs will be back soon!