King of the Hill!

[Ganyu]

My necromantic army of phantoms, summoned by dead souls on the hill, frightens everyone away. Except me. I shall now take my throne as the overlord of the hill of the dead.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I bring out my Darkrai! Being a Dark type against a load of Ghosts, Darkrai proceeds to sweep your phantoms off my hill with ease. Suddenly lacking in the 'ghostly army' department, I use the Infinity Ladle to slam you through the centers of Mars, Jupiter and Neptune and make you land upon Charon, Pluto's moon, where the Charon aliens arrest you for disturbing the peace and throw you in jail. I reclaim my hill shortly thereafter.

MY HILL!!!

[VeloJello]

However, while you're not looking, I swipe your Infinity Ladle and throw it into the Jazz Dimension. Since there is no such thing as a Jazz Dimension, you spend an eternity looking for it, while I am allowed to retire on the hill in comfort. The hill is now mine.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

In response to the above comment on there being no Jazz Dimension, instead of looking for it for all eternity, I instead INVENT A JAZZ DIMENSION TO LOOK IN.

Reality warping. It's awesome like that.

Within seconds of searching, I immediately find my Infinity Ladle again, because it's that freaking big. I also find a Smooth Jazz Wave Motion Gun, Weapon Rank 20 of 40. I immediately fire it at you upon the hill. You land on Chiron in Alpha Centauri, and while you deal with the Mindworms that just so happen to live there, I reclaim my hill.

MY HILL!!!

[Dragotech]

I open the Mystery Box in the middle of a game of zombies and earn the Thundergun which I packapunch... twice. I then use it to blow you off the hill and you land safely in a giant jello mold somewhere in China because it would only make sense to have a giant jello mold in China, right?
Anyways... regardless of why there is a giant jello mold in China... My Hill.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I use my GIANT CHINESE JELLO MOLD LASER OF DOOOOOOOOOOM SHARKS!!!! You're quickly annihilated by the incoming horde of DOOOOOOOOOOM SHARKS!!!! Once they're done annihilating you, I reclaim my hill.

MY HILL!!!!

[Dragotech]

I pull myself together... luckily I brought my Angel Ring to work today... It revived me on top of where I was defeated and then shattered. I knock you off the hill and watch you roll to the bottom and land in an oddly placed oversized storm drain.
My Hill

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

Unfortunately, you fail to realize that I would be carried out of the self-same comically over-sized storm drain in a surprise assault by my DOOOOOOOOOOM SHARKS!!!! Using the almighty combined might of the Infinity Ladle, the Pitchfork of Obliteration, the Smooth Jazz Wave Motion Gun, the hot dog of +20000 attack, the Uber Blaster, The SWORDSPLOSION!!!, the Prinny Gun, and EVERY OTHER WEAPON I'VE USED IN THIS THREAD AND THE PE2K THREAD, I and the TLTTNT (Totally loyal to The Nonexistent Tazz) legion of DOOOOOOOOOOM SHARKS!!!! slam you off of this planet and make you greet Velocity on the planet Chiron at mach 9. Mind the Mindworms!

MY HILL!!!

[Dragotech]

You failed to realize that the combined might of your power knocked the hill with me on it all the way to planet Chiron. Where I now rule over the mindworms as king of the hill... now on a distant planet due to your vastly overpowered arsenal of random weapons...
My hill.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

Unfortunately, you fail to take into account the fact that I put a teleportation device on the hill while you weren't looking, just so it could go back to earth in case you decided to somehow take the hill with you (sans Mindworms). Once it reappears on top of the Yogtowers, the Yogscast appear outside and do hilarious things that are hilarious, oblivious to the hill. You're so distracted you fail to notice me slowly push you off the hill, even once you're at the bottom and fall off to the streets below. With you distracted thoroughly by the Yogscast, I then claim the hill.

MY HILL!!!