The Squawkers RPG - The Main Action and Team Status Thread of Candy Madness! [NOW LIVE AND INSANE!]

[Bulbasaur]

Let's search (24c) Staryubucks Covfefe.

[Neo Emolga]

Well I'm gonna search somewhere I'm sure will be....interesting.

let's just hope it doesn't have some trap the staff or kids set up. I'd rather not explode from cuteness or overeating.....or worse. Who knows what other traps await us.

(24)The Bibbity Bopple Bop Hotel - (24a) Floors 1-5

And if it's a place for kids. They better not mistake me for a kid. I'm an adult! Errrr, ignoring the rainbow butt...aha

Soren has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Such... delicious... doughnuts...

You decide to search out the Bibbity Bopple Bop Hotel because hey, why not? Something about the place intrigues you, so you head over there and grab a few extra doughnuts on the way because they're just awesome today.

You get there and the place seems really cute and colorful because everything is so kiddy like and you're not sure how this business model really took off but something about it just happened to work. It's really noisy though. There's just something about kids that says scream louder than all of the adults combined and that kind of echoes around here.

On the first floor, wow. Playgrounds, pools, a whole room of arts and crafts cataclysmic disasters, finger paint, more crayons than stars in the universe. You also see a Charmander eating glue. Ah, childhood. So innocent and delirious. You also find a kid Starly that admires your rainbow butt and aspires to have one just like that someday. Imagine what might happen if that goes viral!

You head to the second floor where it looks like you find a nifty hair clip in the design of a Staryu. It's cool and you look around to see who might have dropped it, but ah, you don't see anyone. Welp, finders keepers! You can even wear it, though it doesn't grant any special abilities like +500% fire damage or Immunity from Poison. In other words, like most attire!

%Staryu Hair Clip% has been added to the Team Pile!

You check out the remainder of the hotel, but there's mostly just multi-colored rooms, cute cartoonish Pokémon on the walls, colorful carpets, and more room service mac and cheese, chicken fingers, and burgers than you could ever care for. You kind of wonder where they keep the chickens and cows for that in a Pokémon world, but are psychically reminded not to overthink the logistics about anything that happens in this game.

Once you've scouted out the first five floors, you decide to head back. And maybe grab another doughnut on the way back. Hey, these things don't grow on... actually, you know what, never mind that one!

Soren the Rainbow-Butted Pikachu (S: Electric)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowboy (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 3/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Hollywood Movie Shenanigans

[Neo Emolga]

Let's search (24c) Staryubucks Covfefe.

Eddie has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

You too, embrace the magic and love of doughnuts as you head out today. They're raining from the sky, just like that one time-traveling episode from the Simpsons!

You head over to the Staryubucks Covfefe that's a part of the hotel, and you understand why this place exists in this specific spot. Parents. Screaming kids. OH LOOK COFFEE! It suddenly makes you spring into the genius idea that maybe you should open up a bar nearby! Well, of course, maybe after all this is over, else you might just be serving sticky soda out of a gooey tavern made of layer cake.

Today, business is GOOOOOOD. Turns out having doughnuts without a drink is lame, so add coffee to your free doughnuts! That's like being a French Fry vendor on the day it starts raining free hot dogs and hamburgers! But you're not looking to embracing waiting on line. Funny how a state of emergency could be declared but... some things never change!

Inside, the place is nice and trendy and impeccably clean while Pokémon drink coffee that seems to be less coffee and much more... other stuff. Like whipped cream, caramel, syrup, and come on guys, isn't there enough of this stuff out there for free!? While walking around for a place to see while just about every teenage Pokémon has their laptop open and studying, you find someone dropped their room key on the floor. You pick it up and check it out to see it looks like it belongs to Room 800, most likely on the eighth floor. Unless they're just screwing around with their customers! You look around and figure whoever lost it is long gone, so into your pouch it goes!

Item [Room 800 Key] has been added to the Team Pile!

You continue looking around and you find another funky lost item. It seems to be... an evil coffee cup. Actually, it's kind of cool! It looks demonic with a badass horn-like handle, horns on the top, a black and red scaly demon skin surface, and sits on a base of four fang-like teeth! Wow, if Hell had coffee cups, you're pretty sure they'd look something like this! Well, what are you waiting for? Take it!

Item [Coffee Cup of Calamity] has been added to the Team Pile!

You then decide to head out and go back to base because all the available seats are taken and you're pretty sure the Pokémon at the end of the line are going to be pushing on a daisy before they finally get served. You found a lot of cool stuff today and feel pretty good!

Eddie the Epic Bulbasaur (S: Grass/Poison)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Browser History Hacking

[Noblejanobii]

Let's talk to 9 Dinkydee the Hydreigon [D]

[VeloJello]

Mmm, donuts. Are there any chocolate glazed? Those are my favorite.

Some of these cops seem a lot less competent and a lot more shifty than others.

Interview 24 Biggs the Lopunny.

[Scytherwolf]

I guess I'll interview 55 Upenstoop the Typhlosion!

[Neo Emolga]

Let's talk to 9 Dinkydee the Hydreigon [D]

Why not!? But first...

Madder has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Mrf, these are delicious! It makes you eat like six of these things before you finally decide to stop from the exhaustion. Anyway...

Interview Rapport: NEUTRAL, INTIMIDATING
+Intimidation (Fairy VS Dark)
+Intimidation (Fairy VS Dragon)
+Modesty (Ghost VS Dark)

You find Dinkydee the Hydreigon working at the Stuff Your Gut grocery where he happens to be the owner and the general manager! And to put it mildly, he's pissed for reasons that are probably understandable considering his entire store is now nothing but desserts, desserts, and more desserts. And golly, business has been BAD considering there certainly isn't a shortage of supply of that stuff and it's for FREE.

"What are you here for and ERRAGGGGHHH, it's one of you FILTHY FAIRY TYPES!" Dinkydee shouts, squashing a chocolate baguette in a fit of rage. Tell me you're here to actually buy something!"

...Nope! You tell him you're here for a chat and he just scowls.

"THAT'S IT!?" he shouts, taking a big, monstrous bite of his candified desk in passionate, hangry fury. "WHAT THE BLAZES COULD THIS POSSIBLY BE ABOUT!?"

You ask if he's noticed anything unusual around and what info he could provide about the Squawkers.

"Oh, that's all," Dinkydee sarcastically chuckles. "THAT'S ALL. LOOK AROUND YOU, PIP SQUEAK, THIS IS WHAT THE SQUAWKERS DID TO MY STORE! And I had a plan to lose twenty pounds. Guess what! Only thirty-four pounds to go! YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY!?"

You pretend to cough because it kind of is.

"Just go!" Dinkydee shouts. "Gah, will the agony ever end!?"

You have to admit, it was kind of funny to see him go nuts, but you didn't get too much out of him besides that.

Madder the Devious Mimikyu (S: Ghost/Fairy)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowboy (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/12
Groovy Abilities: Stealth Mode | Perky Stuff!: Browser History Hacking

[Neo Emolga]

Mmm, donuts. Are there any chocolate glazed? Those are my favorite.

Some of these cops seem a lot less competent and a lot more shifty than others.

Interview 24 Biggs the Lopunny.

Velo has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Mmmmmm, so creamy and delicious. You chomp down another chocolate glazed donut until you feel sick of them. It's so tasty and makes your taste buds dance.

Once you've enjoyed those things, you head off to see Biggs the Lopunny.

Interview Rapport: NEUTRAL

You find Biggs the bouncing and jovial Lopunny working at the police station, which still hasn't improved since the last time you visited it. The place is still a mess with candy and dessert everywhere. Biggs's office is nothing but creamy layer cake and his police computer is just nothing but a chocolate slab at this point. But instead of working around it, Biggs is pretty much just goofing off.

"Oh hey, hello up there!" Biggs waves to you, looking up and feeling surprised to be greeted by you as a Lugia. "What can ol' Biggs do for you, ma'am?"

You ask Biggs if he's noticed anything more unusual around town and what he can provide for evidence regarding the Squawkers.

"Oh, yeah, I had a lot of stuff about them!" Biggs tells you with a goofy smile. "Right on this computer! And a lot evidence in the storage room! Oh boy, and then you'll never guess what happened next!"

You nod cynically.

"Let me guess, it became chocolate," you tell him.

"Yeah!" Biggs replies enthusiastically. "How did- oh, well, yeah, of course. I mean it's sitting right there! Now, I love chocolate. Mmm, I could live off of the stuff! But that... that REALLY messed up the investigation! You see, a chocolate computer doesn't really turn on anymore so I can't access any of my records! Or play Minesweeper either! And on top of that, my written notes aren't really legible anymore! Those Squawkers are really sneaky! That was really a 'boom, checkmate, pal!' and I can't do a thing about it!"

Despite Biggs's honesty and the truth behind the situation, you still feel it's really not productive for Biggs to just give up like this. You suggest he start from scratch, jot down what he remembers, and use a new portable device like a tablet or a laptop to store his new findings and breakthroughs.

"UGH, I thought about that!" Biggs sighs with a smile, but then becomes perky again. "No really, I did! But that's just... HARD! Starting from scratch is BRUTAL! But yeah, maybe we should operate someplace else! Especially since every time I sit down, oh man, my butt gets slathered with chocolate because of this desk chair and that's not fun to shower off! Tough stuff, really!"

"Well, I really should move on!" Biggs tells you with a smile. "I'll miss this cool office, but you're right that I should probably work elsewhere! Maybe I'll try my condo instead! Hey, this just gave me a great excuse to work from home every day! I could get in a few more hours of YouCube that way!"

You nod and then decide to head out. You figure considering this guy is the sheriff, this town is probably in big trouble!

Velo the Heroic Lugia (L: Psychic/Flying)

Classy: Guardian Snow Angel
Style: Puns of Anarchy (Overwhelming Cuteness -3 on each Enemy Attack)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/12
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/8
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Hardcore Parkour

[Neo Emolga]

I guess I'll interview 55 Upenstoop the Typhlosion!

Carly has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

You definitely have to say the ones with the strawberry icing and filling are the best. You eat a whole lot of them and almost decide they're worth keeping until you stop and remind yourself yeah, maybe that's not the best idea. But mmm, they're always delicious!

And of course, your chat with Upenstoop!

Interview Rapport: NEUTRAL
+1 Shared Pokémon Type (Fire)
-1 Evolution Stage Difference

You find Upenstoop the Typhlosion working as the owner and general manager of The Silver Orange Hotel. The first thing you notice is he's chewing the heck out of his plastic pen and then when he sees you, he jumps back a bit, but then goes back to nibbling.

"H-hi," he greets you. "Hi hi hi. Did you... hi, did you want s-something? ANYTHING AT ALL!?"

You tell him you're trying to figure out what's going on around town and what he knows about the Squawkers. He gets even more jittery and skittish, but he nods really quickly and tries to smile.

"Oh oh oh yes," he says. "Oh yes, lots of weird stuff. Like my pants. Someone stole them! Why w-why would someone do thaaaat!? I would... I really, really would have given them away if they just asked! Because I'm always buying new pants and don't need the old ones! A-always. Maybe... well, most often. I guess sometimes, though I haven't done it for a while. Maybe for years!"

You slowly nod, really not confident on where this seems to be going.

"I made something for you," he smiles, presenting you with some metallic sculpture. "Because... I love all my customers."

He places it before you and you see it's a mound of staples. You're not sure if it's supposed to actually resemble something or if he just got really carried away with a staple gun.

"I call this masterpiece... 'CLOUDZ,'" Upenstoop tells you excitedly. "It's one of my b-best works. BEST WORKS! He has a sister, but she's found the perfect home already, but DON'T YOU WORRY because Cloudz will always have her number. They'll call every night. I'm... *sniff* I'm so proud of them. My little b-babies grow up so fast..."

You slowly nod and take your... staple sculpture. And your thinking immediately jumps to using a sidewalk trash can so he doesn't ever realize you've dumped it.

"Oh, the Squawkers," Upenstoop sighs. "One of them might be a bird! I think. I wonder what the wedding will be like! It's going to be so beautiful..."

You decide to head out as you realize this really doesn't seem to be going anywhere... sane. Maybe next time.

Carly the Courageous Growlithe (M: Fire)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100%)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/10
Overwhelming Cuteness: 7/10
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Memes

[Suicune's Fire]

So...many...delicious...doughnuts! MUST RESIST!



You know what? I don't even care. I'm going in. These doughnuts make me feel like I can do anything...

SEARCH (5a) Tickleboot Apartments - Floors 1-3 (CANDY)

And use INFANT ANNIHILATOR!!!!!! on the Giddy Flower Box of Yippie!!!