Daily Pokemon Stories

[Noblejanobii]

Great poems, EZ! I really like how the torkoal one describes the fire burning inside of it!

Sorry for the delay! Today's Pokémon is,

The bat Pokémon, #042, Golbat!

Spoiler:

Kiosia had never noticed how musically inclined prison was. From the march of the patrolling soldiers to the beat you could make by banging cups against the bars of the cell, prison had a lot to offer when it came to making music. If Kiosia were more musically gifted, she might try to write a song. But she wasn’t, plus she had places to be.

Sirens began to echo throughout the compound as all the guards began to swarm towards the front gates. Naturally, of course, as all prison guards do when being attacked by a pirate ship attempting to rescue its captain. Kiosia stood up and stretched, prompting an odd look from her cellmate.

“That your ride?” she asked. Kiosia nodded and saluted.

“Yep! Care to join me?”

“Nah I think I’m good,” she replied, “hate to leave a place with such good food. If I get caught again I might get moved somewhere else. Maybe next time, yeah?” Kiosia snickered and gave her cellmate a thumbs up before putting her fingers to her lips and whistling. A soft flapping could be heard in the distance and a zubat carrying a bag suddenly appeared.

“Zubat! How are ya, buddy?” The bat pokemon screeched and pulled the bag into the inside of the cell. Kiosia dug inside, sorting through the six pokeballs until she found her lock picking kit. Going to the side where the lock was, she stuck her arms through and began to fiddle with the lock. It was a bit harder not being able to see, but no lock was match for Kiosia. She heard the click and quickly pulled her arms back as the door opened. Kiosia tightened her faded Team Aqua bandana and smirked. “See ya!” Kiosia called to her cellmate as she scooped up her bag and began to skip down the hall.

Shouts rose up from the other cells as Kiosia’s escape with Zubat began. The zubat suddenly dove down and struck a hidden grimer with a wing attack. Kiosia sidestepped the grimer and continued down the walkway. By now, some of the guards had noticed the escaped inmate running around and tried to stop her. Drawing their weapons, two guards tried to fire at Kiosia, but her zubat released a thick haze, allowing Kiosia to drop a floor and escape their gunfire unharmed. Landing in a crouch, Kiosia found herself surrounded by four growlithe.

The puppy pokemon growled at her, before a command from above caused them to charge up four flamethrowers. Kiosia snapped her fingers and Zubat began to flap its wings quickly, releasing several air cutters. The winds sliced up the four fire type pokemon, giving Kiosia the opportunity to flee towards the entrance. She could see the light just ahead, but right as they were about to reach it, an Alolan Sandslash landed in front of the door. It roared, its iceberg spikes seeming much bigger than the average size. Kiosia stumbled a little, not sure how to get past this. She couldn’t afford to wait too long or else she’d be caught. And except for Zubat all her other pokemon were locked in their balls. Kiosia clicked her tongue and nodded to Zubat. He screeched and released another haze but it barely phased their opponent. It released a powder snow that dispersed the haze then released a series of Icicle Spears. Kiosia managed to duck away in time, but Zubat was struck. Kiosia dove to catch her partner, the poor thing’s wing having taken the hit. She turned as the Sandslash towered over them, preparing a metal claw to end it all. Suddenly Kiosia was blinded by a bright light and Zubat disappeared from her arms. As the light faded, Kiosia saw a golbat between she and the Sandslash. Zubat had evolved!

Golbat flapped its wings rapidly releasing a flurry of hot winds that Kiosia recognized as Heat Wave. It burned the Sandslash, causing the pokemon to retreat and giving Kiosia access to the exit. Without needing any prompting, Kiosia sprinted out of the entrance and rushed for the docks where her crew was waiting. She could hear gunshots all around her but they bounced off of Golbat’s protect as Kiosia scaled the ladder dropped down to her. She was welcomed by her crew with hearty cheers, and Kiosia could definitely say she couldn’t wait to explore with her partner’s new found power.

[Suicune's Fire]

oml that golbat. XD Oh my. I shall write something if I end up bothering.

[Noblejanobii]

Today's Pokemon is...

The Tundra Pokemon, #699, Aurorus!

Spoiler:

Aurorus walked briskly down a cobblestone road towards the heart of the city. He was on a mission that he needed to accomplish, but he wasn’t quite sure how. His white hair glistened as he traveled under street lamps, the wind tugging at his scarf. Aurorus needed to find a book, but not just any book, a book she would like. But where to get one? He could not purchase one, for it was illegal for gijinkas to do so. He did not want to bother Cleo with such a quest. It was not for her concern. After all, she still had the medical bills to pay off. So then how?

Tugging his blue coat closer to his skin, Aurorus continued down the dark streets, hoping to figure out some way or some place to purchase a book. As he walked, Aurorus felt a stare lingering on him. But every time he looked around, the gaze would vanish for several minutes. Finally, as the man reached the end of the street, a shadow formed in front of him. It took the form of a person then dispersed, leaving behind a young man. He bowed, taking off his black conical hat and smiled, his gold eyes glittering in the night.

“You seem like a man on a mission,” the young man proposed in a charismatic voice, “perhaps I may help?” He reached up his black sleeve and pulled out a card from inside. On it read “Lee Crepit, locater of things”. “What is it you are looking for, sir?”

Aurorus stared at Lee suspiciously, but thought it would not hurt to try this. After all, it was obvious this stranger was a fellow gijinka. Though, even with the distinct features of purple hair and a warm aura, it was difficult to place which type. Aurorus sighed, a cold breath escaping him, before nodding.

“I am in search of a book. I am teaching someone to read, but we are running out of material.” Lee’s smile broadened and he rubbed his chin.

“Oh I see. Well then, leave it to me. Tomorrow night, come back to this spot, and I will have returned with your book. And don’t forget to bring some cash. I require payment for all my services!” Before Aurorus could ask how much was required, Lee vanished. The gijinka sighed and turned away, returning to the mechanic shop he called home.

As he entered the building, he walked upstairs to the attic, where everyone slept due to the lack of space in the shop. He spotted five figures all hidden in the darkness, his fellow gijinka teammates and their owner. Aurorus quietly stepped over all of them to take his place on the far side of the attic. As he crept, movement caught his eye, and he saw someone was sitting up, watching him. Aurorus paused, spotting Shaymin on the other side of the room. She had a curious look in her eye, but did not say anything, and laid back down to go to sleep.

Aurorus sighed mentally. That had been too close. After all, it would ruin the surprise for her if he had to explain his whereabouts. He hoped she wouldn’t ask tomorrow. This needed to remain a secret until he got a new book.

The next night, Aurorus left the shop once again and returned to the street where he had met Lee the night before. He had all the money he had saved up through tips he had earned at the shop. Now he waited a bit impatiently by the street lamp at the end of the street. After half an hour, the shadows moved and Lee materialized. He was carrying a small basket with not one but three books. Aurorus looked up in surprise, but the hard realization hit that he’d probably have to pay for all three. He barely had enough for one.

“Good evening, our deal stands, I assume?” Lee asked, holding out the basket for Aurorus to look at. Aurorus gave a short nod before holding out the bag.

“It may not even be enough for one, but it is all I have.” Lee made a somewhat disappointed look before sighing. He took the bag then shoved the basket into Aurorus’s arm.

“I forgot I always give a first trial discount,” Lee muttered, a hint of bitterness in his voice. “Just pay full price next time.” He disappeared again into the darkness, leaving Aurorus filled with a sense of wonder and happiness.

He returned to the shop, but managed to slip in without anyone noticing this time. The next day, Aurorus spotted Shaymin sitting in the window of their shop. Her green hair flowed over her shoulders, standing out very well against her pale skin and white dress. She seemed to be focused on something outside the window, but Aurorus gained her attention as he drew closer. Pulling the basket out from behind his back, he presented it to her.

“It’s not much,” Aurorus said, “but I noticed we were running out of material for you to learn from. So I got some new books for us to read.” Shaymin’s eyes lit up and she stared at the basket before looking back at Aurorus.

“Where did you get these?” she asked quietly, a flicker of worry crossing her face. If he had stolen him they could be in trouble.

“I bought them, from a… vendor,” Aurorus replied, choosing his words carefully. Probably best they didn’t know he had bought them from Lee for now. The answer seemed to satisfy Shaymin. She pat the spot on the window beside her and Aurorus sat down. Picking up one of the books, Aurorus cracked it open and began to read.

[Suicune's Fire]

That aurorus' hair looks fabulous.

[Noblejanobii]

My apologies on not updating yesterday. I was having a rough day.

Today's Pokemon is...

The Thorn Pod Pokemon, #598, Ferrothorn!

Spoiler:

The large wooden doors opened as the uncomfortable smuggler straightened her collar. She was wearing the world's single most uncomfortable pantsuit. But the boss required her to dress professionally when meeting with her. He also had a rule of no belts either. It was strange and the redhead hated it but you can't argue with the boss. Setting one foot in front of the other, the smuggler entered the large room with high ceilings and valuable undoubtedly stolen paintings.

“Ahh my Angel returns to me. How are you, my dear? Was the Bruxish mission a success?” Angel continued to walk forward as the man spoke. He was stout and large wearing a jaunty yellow suit. His black shined shoes were resting on the table in front of him as he leaned back with his arms behind his head. His brown eyes were most definitely not focused on Angel’s face as a smirk twisted his thin black moustache.

“Yes sir,” Angel replied as she reached table. Her boss gestured for her to sit in the opposing chair and so she did. He chuckled a little then asked,

“Did those Alolan police scramble when they saw you driving a car?” Angel nodded again silently, not wanting to speak more than she had to. “Well good. I'll be sure to pay you soon. I'm glad I can always count on you to complete a job, unlike Ioan.” Angel cocked her head ever so slightly at that. Despite being rivals for the smuggling business, Angel and Ioan didn't hate each other. They were drinking buddies after all, with Paul usually being the designated driver. What had happened that caused such a mention?

“Just let me know what I can do next,” Angel replied quietly.

“You're curious,” the boss interjected, causing Angel to stiffen ever so slightly. “Curiousity does not suit you, Angel. It’ll land you where Ioan is going.” Angel drew her eyebrows together.

“And where would that be?” Angel asked. A strangely psychotic smile spread across the boss’s face and he pointed upward as he spoke.

“Dealing with Executioner.” Angel’s head immediately snapped up to see a ferrothorn hanging from the ceiling. How had she not noticed it when she came in? Then again, the ceilings were high in this room and in every corner of the room there was a chandelier. If one was not looking at the ferrothorn directly, it could blend in quite well. But now was not the time to be admiring the trick, as the pokemon’s gold eyes snapped open with murder sparkling in them.

The ceiling rumbled and creaked as the ferrothorn released from its perch and dropped. Angel was barely able to scrambled away in time to not be smashed. Angel’s breathing began to pick up. Now she understood the dress code. No belts meant no secure way to carry pokeballs, which meant you couldn’t fight back if you were set to die. Angel couldn’t maneuver as well in a tight pantsuit either. She did have another trick up her sleeve though. Angel mentally called out for her partner, hoping and praying the Abra would hear her. However, her calls went unanswered, as if they were been blocked or something had happened to Lycurgus. Angel quickly tucked and rolled out of the way as a pin missile collided with where she had been crouched moments before. Guess she couldn’t worry about him right now either.

Angel could hear her boss laughing as she futilely tried to dodge Executioner. Pin missile after pin missile was launched at her, a pattern forming of sorts, but it had to be a trap. There was no way it wasn’t. Angel had seen some of the bodies of Executioner’s victims, there was more to a pin missile than that. The bodies were usually utterly obliterated! Angel quickly realized what could cause that when a silver and purple light formed above the ferrothorn’s head and blasted her way. Angel managed to dodge but she knew the attack quite well. Flash cannon was a powerful and deadly attack. She couldn’t afford to get hit with that.

Angel began to sprint across the room towards the doors, hoping to make it without getting hit when pain suddenly shot up through her legs. She fell to the ground as more pain sprouted up across her body. Angel’s vision began to go in and out as she spikes driving up through her. Executioner had been laying a trap, she realized, that was why the pin missiles had been so easy to dodge. Angel could hear the ferrothorn charging another flash cannon and closed her eyes. She couldn’t get out of this now, so better to not let a heinous carpet be the last thing she saw.

But it never came.

“Halt!” a commanding voice shouted as the doors were flung open. “This is the Veilstone police! Put your hands in the air, crime lord Basilio Piraino, you’re under arrest for the smuggling of pokemon, human trafficking, and-” Angel never heard the end of that sentence. She passed out before she could. But for a second, just a fleeting second, she thought she could hear Ioan’s voice in the fading distance of reality.

[Noblejanobii]

Today's Pokemon is....

The Fairy Pokemon, #035, Clefairy!

Spoiler:

“Quite the mess you’ve gotten yourself into, Jalal. Though I gotta ask, why did you bring me into this?”

Jalal Attar crouched in an alleyway in Jubilife City. It was dark due to a power surge that had knocked out all the power in the city. It was being blamed on the “rogue PBI agent” but he had done nothing of the sort. It was just a stunt to turn public opinion against him. Anybody who had met Jalal knew he would do no such thing. But given he was an agent of the Pokemon Bureau of Investigation, not many people had met him. Thankfully, one person had, and was willing to stick out their neck to help him.

Jalal looked over his shoulder at the young man crouched with him. He wasn’t wearing his usual street wear but it was easier to hide that way. His brown hair was hidden under a navy blue hoodie, a glare levelled at Jalal. He was wearing jeans and sneakers, obviously not his favorites either. Given how long they’d been on the road, it was a worthy sacrifice. Neither of their outfits were in pristine condition. He was a fellow Sinnoh branch agent, like Jalal, and a fairy type specialist, named Dylan Thomas.

“I’m sorry, man, I didn’t realize they’d label us both fugitives. I figured I’d get hit but I never expected-”

“How could you not figure that out?” Dylan snapped back, causing Jalal to flinch. “You came to my house and told me you needed to lay low without any explanation. Then they saw you inside and labeled me as a fugitive because I was harboring you!” Dylan put his face in one of his hands. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be rude. I’m just…” he paused then whispered, “Sloane…” Jalal needed no more explanation. It was well known around the Sinnoh branch that Dylan was a lucky fellow with a somewhat rambunctious girlfriend. She was a bit on the fragile side though so Dylan was constantly fretting about her. Now that he was a wanted man, not only could she be taken in for interrogation, but they also could not risk contacting each other and were completely cut off for the time being. If Jalal was in his shoes, he’d be worried too.

“I get it,” Jalal replied quietly. He looked out into the streets again before nodding to Dylan. “Coast looks clear. We should try to make a break for it now. If we can make it to the water’s edge we can surf to Canalave and catch a ferry out of here.” Dylan gave a sharp nod. Standing up slightly, Jalal took one last look out of the alleyway before dashing into the street with Dylan right behind. It was somewhat ominous to be traveling in Jubilife City with no lights on. Moving silently through the night, the two PBI agents ran past the Poketch Company HQ. As they were nearing the exit to the waters between Jubilife and Canalave, a bright light suddenly flooded their area. Jalal and Dylan both flinched, covering their eyes out of reflex. A loud voice came over the loudspeaker of the helicopter.

“Jalal Attar and Dylan Thomas, put your hands in the air! We have you spotted! You are under arrest for the illegal trafficking of an Ultra Beast.” Well like hell they were going to do that. Dylan was the first to recover, grabbing Jalal’s arm and bolting out of the helicopter’s spotlight. “After them!” The two agents sprinted for the docks not too far away, the sound of soldier boots behind them creating a sense of panic in Jalal’s chest. Dylan reached to his belt and unclipped one of his pokeballs. He clicked the center button but to his surprise, it would not open. He frowned before realizing what had happened.

“They set off an EMP!” Dylan said, slapping his pokeball back onto his belt. “The helicopter must have precautions against it but that’s why there’s a blackout. They wanted to knock out our pokeballs, our means of escape.” Jalal clicked his tongue in frustration and glanced over his shoulder.

“How good of a swimmer are you?” he asked as they nearly reached the docks. Dylan smirked a little and immediately began to take off his hoodie. The two threw their jackets aside, followed by their shirts. Jalal sent up a silent prayer that none of their pokeballs were knocked loose then dove into the water, Dylan right beside him. It was pitch black underwater, but there was nothing they could do about that. Jalal kicked his legs back, keeping his arms straight by his side as he shot forward as far as he could before forcing himself to resurface. Kicking off his shoes, Jalal began to do his fastest stroke, the breaststroke. As the helicopter propellers grew louder, Jalal and Dylan dove back under, going as far as they could before resurfacing. The one perk to this was that no pokeball was EMP proof just yet. If they couldn’t use their pokemon, neither could these losers.

Though there was another problem. If they had set off an EMP, then Canalave was probably impacted too. Communications may be impacted, but more importantly, that meant no ships were running. How would they get out of Sinnoh? If an EMP had really been set off, it was possible that power could be out for days, week, or forever. Was this ultra beast really worth possibly permanently knocking out power in one of Sinnoh’s biggest cities?

“Get down!” Dylan suddenly shouted, pushing Jalal underwater. Jalal barely had time to catch a breath before he was shoved under. Bullets suddenly rippled the surface of the water, missing the two. They resurface before diving back underwater again, trying to escape the gunfire. One good thing was that without the spotlight on them, Jalal and Dylan were practically invisible. Nearly to a piece of land on the opposite side of the water, the boys could see the helicopter keeping its beam trained on the edges. They’d have to bolt almost as soon as they reached the land. Diving under one last time, the two shot forward to the edge.

Jalal grabbed on first and pulled himself onto the land. He wasn’t in the spotlight right away, but at the sound of his and Dylan’s splashing, it shifted to them. The two immediately ducked into the trees at the edge, wood splitting from gunfire. Now barefoot and exposed to the elements, the soaking wet PBI agents dashed through the woods of Route 218 towards Canalave City. Shouts and gunfire echoed behind them as they reached the city’s edge. Just as Jalal had suspected, there were no lights on. The EMP had hit this city too. But Dylan didn’t hesitate. Grabbing Jalal’s arm, he pulled the electric type specialist into the city, sticking close to the shadows.

The two dashed for an inn on the edge of town. Soldiers were starting to enter the city behind them, Jalal noticed. He unclipped a pokeball from his belt and tried opening it. No dice. Dylan knocked on the door quietly, using a special pattern. There was silence and a chill crawled up Jalal’s spine as the soldiers drew closer. Then the door opened and the two men were pulled inside. Locking the door behind them, a man that looked eerily similar to Dylan glared at the two.

“What the heck have you done now?” he asked, his anger very visible in the light cast by a volbeat standing nearby.

“It’s a long story,” Dylan answered. “Look, Owen, I know this is short notice, but I need to borrow your clefairy. Is she out of her pokeball?” Owen nodded a little and whistled quietly. A clefairy scampered over.

“I always keep all my pokemon out of their pokeballs. I’m guessing that’s a good thing given you two don’t have any of yours out.” Jalal nodded silently, causing Owen to sigh. “Seriously, cousin, you have to explain this to me later on, okay?” Dylan held out his hand.

“Promise, just not now. We need to teleport to Iron Island.” Owen took Dylan’s hand and shook it as Jalal’s head snapped towards them.

“Wait hold up. Clefairy can’t learn teleport!” Dylan merely smiled at Jalal and gestured to the clefairy.

“Some can, but it’s generally unheard of nowadays. Jezebel here is one of the few that remain.” Dylan bent down and picked up Jezebel before holding out a hand to Jalal. “She can get us to Iron Island. At the very least, they won’t look for us there for a few days. We give Jezebel a few days to rest, then teleport to Fullmoon and Newmoon islands. At that point we should be close enough we can teleport to Mt. Coronet or Route 217. If we can make it to Snowpoint they might have a ferry we can take somewhere else.”

That sounded like a really risky plan but did they have much of a choice. Jalal glanced down at the beast ball on his belt. He hoped he was doing the right thing, then took Dylan’s outstretched hand.

[Noblejanobii]

Today's Pokémon is…

The Gnash Teeth Pokemon, #779, Bruxish!

Spoiler:

Sirens blared as a car tore through the streets of Ula’Ula Island. People jumped out of the way as a purple Rapidash GT350 ripped through the streets that were definitely not made for a vehicle. How one had gotten into this area without being noticed still perplexed the cops, but that was not their main question right now. Their main job was to catch the rogue car before it reached the docks. If it boarded a ship then they lost jurisdiction to the ships off Aether Paradise. They had already radioed ahead, but other than passenger ships there was no sign of a ship equipped to carry a car anyway.

The driver smirked as she maneuvered her vehicle through the tight streets of Ula’Ula island’s main city. She couldn’t risk getting caught but that wasn’t much of a worry to her. She glanced to the passenger seat where her partner, an abra, sat, ready to teleport at a moment’s notice. It was a last resort since she had used him to get her on the island. Still, it could work if she got close enough to the docks.

“Yo! Angel! Chill with the turns. You might toss around the fish too much.” Angel glanced up into her rearview mirror at the man sitting in the back, her partner, Paul. She cocked an eyebrow at him. He acted like she wasn’t aware of that fact. They were smuggling Bruxish after all. These fish weren’t allowed outside Alola legally for a reason. If she wasn’t careful, they could chew through the trunk of her car, even with the special case they had put in it.

“And you need to stop backseat driving, Paul. I’d rather not get caught smuggling Bruxish, yeah? It’s kind of a felony in case you didn’t know.” Paul gave Angel a disgusted look but shut up. Angel caught the flicker of red and blue and narrowed her eyes. They were catching up using bikes from the looks of it. Angel could feel the adrenaline starting to kick in and a smile played at her lips. Good, she liked a challenge. Putting more pressure on the accelerator, the Rapidash shot forward. Angel reached over and quickly changed gears before drifting into the shopping district. Switching into reverse, Angel began to drive backwards, a stunt that inexperienced drivers should not under any circumstance perform in an extremely safe setting. Thankfully, Angel had a lot of practice and therefore was qualified enough to perform such a stunt.

Shooting towards the back of the shopping district, Angel kept her eyes towards the back, left hand on the wheel and right hand on the gear shift. Just as she was about to reach the library, Angel yanked the steering wheel to the left. The tail of the car swung right as Angel shifted gears back then slammed on the gas. The purple car shot forward, leaving the motorcycles in its dust. Angel spun the Rapidash back onto the main road and eyed the straight shot towards the docks. Two cards blocked the road, but like some measly blockade had ever stopped her before.

Adjusting her gold aviators, Angel’s green eyes focused on the two officers out of their cars. These idiots obviously had never dealt with smugglers using cars before. The perks of smuggling in Alola. Leaning forward slightly in excitement, Angel didn’t slow down at all as she ran down the blockade. The two officers fired shots at the window, but Angel wasn’t a fool. The bullets barely left a dent on the bulletproof glass. The two were nearly run over as Angel slammed into the two cars head on, the reinforced hood and bumper taking no damage as the police cars were knocked aside like toys.

Angel let out a cheer as she sped towards the docks, nothing able to stop them now. Spectators and police watched as the smugglers sped towards the waters. Now putting her full weight on the accelerator, Angel giggled as the car shot off the edge of the dock. But, before it could plummet into the war, the car disappeared. Miles away, a smuggler ship lay into neutral territory. The purple Rapidash GT350 reappeared onboard. Angel turned off the car and slid out of the car. Tossing her curly red hair over her shoulder, Angel walked to the trunk of her car and popped it open. Paul and several other smugglers that had been awaiting her arrival came over as well. Shouts and cheers went up at the sight. They had done it, they had successfully smuggled six Bruxish off of Ula’Ula island.

[Neo Emolga]

This thing, this thing, it's erasure I wish
What were you thinking, Game Freak, when you made up this fish?
Oh the colors, the lips, oh the sanity-singe!
This thing is no fun and just makes me go cringe!

We have Starmie and Slowking as great psychic/water types
So what madman developer thought of this tripe?
Now in my poor brain this thing leaves a scar
It looks like the bastard child of Flounder and Jar Jar!

What better way to complete a grim Monday
Than to make this foul mess Pokémon of the Day?
"This thing's a Pokémon," oh what terrible, horrible news
Come with me friend and lets drown our sorrows with booze

[Arrow-Jolteon]

This thing, this thing, it's erasure I wish
What were you thinking, Game Freak, when you made up this fish?
Oh the colors, the lips, oh the sanity-singe!
This thing is no fun and just makes me go cringe!

We have Starmie and Slowking as great psychic/water types
So what madman developer thought of this tripe?
Now in my poor brain this thing leaves a scar
It looks like the bastard child of Flounder and Jar Jar!

What better way to complete a grim Monday
Than to make this foul mess Pokémon of the Day?
"This thing's a Pokémon," oh what terrible, horrible news
Come with me friend and lets drown our sorrows with booze

This is beautiful XD

[Noblejanobii]

This thing, this thing, it's erasure I wish
What were you thinking, Game Freak, when you made up this fish?
Oh the colors, the lips, oh the sanity-singe!
This thing is no fun and just makes me go cringe!

We have Starmie and Slowking as great psychic/water types
So what madman developer thought of this tripe?
Now in my poor brain this thing leaves a scar
It looks like the bastard child of Flounder and Jar Jar!

What better way to complete a grim Monday
Than to make this foul mess Pokémon of the Day?
"This thing's a Pokémon," oh what terrible, horrible news
Come with me friend and lets drown our sorrows with booze

I was in class when I saw this so I couldn't adequately reply but this is amazingly hilarious. I hope to see more of these in the future!