The Squawkers RPG - The Main Action and Team Status Thread of Candy Madness! [NOW LIVE AND INSANE!]

[Neo Emolga]

Hmm, such a different setting than what we are used to. So might as well have a bit of fun :p

I'm gonna search (27) SILLY SLIDE OF RAINBOWS OH MY GOSHISHISHNESS YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS OUT But I'm gonna go ALL OUT to start. (27c) EEEEEVEN MOAR RAINBOW SLIDES!!!! EXCLUSIVE DOUBLE RAINBOW SLIDES!!!! To be precise! Gotta check these out. Hey! Someone's gonna have to risk it at some point! Might as well go early on before things get crazy!

Soren has gained 1 point of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Pink Glitter Snow!

You decide to head out in the fluffy pinky glitter snow because hey, why not!? And hey, why not start with the MOST EXCITING PLACE IN THE WHOLE TOWN!? EXCLUSIVE DOUBLE RAINBOW SLIDES!

You have no idea what kind of business model this place is trying to go for, but who cares!? You spot the rainbow-colored building and when you step inside its proudest accomplishment, my goodness, it's like a whole new world opened up and it's mystical and magical and just STUFFED WITH INCREDIBLE RAINBOW SLIDES! dOUBlE RaINBoW SLideZ!! Rainbow slides everywhere in a mystical cosmic giant room like you're sliding across the universe in style! And color! You can't help but take a moment to slide around and whirl yourself silly on these things! It almost makes it too easy to forget about what the fudge you're here for in Booplesnoot in the first place!

Okay, so after really spending all morning goofing off on these things, cruising about the painted galaxy like everything's fine and everything's good, you actually decide to get to work and see if there's anything out of the ordinary. You know, besides EVERYTHING, of course. You go sliding around one rainbow slide and you realize someone must have dropped a key while they were going sliding around and it must have slipped out of their grasp! But you're classy and cool and you're able to swipe it back up before you slide away too fast. Only thing is...

#Extra Shiny Sparkles! - PSYCHIC (+2 Overwhelming Cuteness)# 15% Evasion Test: 46 out of 100
FAILED!

Soren has gained 2 points of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Extra Shiny Sparkles!

#[Magical Star Trunk Key] Extra Shiny Sparkles! - PSYCHIC (+2 Overwhelming Cuteness)# has been added to the Team Pile!

Oh, you just feel more adorable after picking that up! You wonder what this magical star key goes to, but you're sure it has to go to something! Maybe something important!

You don't find anything much else besides more rainbow slides. And while they're wonderful and delightful, you're in dire need of a break before you pass out. But you really enjoyed feeling like a kid again!

You decide to head back to rejoin all your other lovely Peeps with the key you found!

Soren the Valiant Pikachu (S: Electric)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowboy (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 0/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 3/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Hollywood Movie Shenanigans

[Neo Emolga]

Why do I have to partake in this again?

You know exactly why. I'm keeping you busy here so you'll stop tormenting Fate and the others. Now get to work!

Why you little-

Fine whatever. I'm going to interview 49 Cabbi the Honchkrow [D].

Madder has gained 1 point of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Pink Glitter Snow!

Interview Rapport: NEUTRAL
+Intimidation (Fairy VS Dark)
+Modesty (Ghost VS Dark)

You decide to chat with Cabbi, wondering what this bloated black bird has been up to since Booplesnoot's been under insanity candy chaos lately. You find him working as a cashier at the Tingletoots Buttons and Boots! store at the mall, the kind of job everyone aspires to have! At first he thinks you're here to buy something, but you decide you'd rather talk to him, which he nods sarcastically. You introduce yourself to him and ask him his thoughts about the Squawkers and the nonsense they've been doing.

"Oh, it's lovely," Cabbi replies with a snarky remark. "Certainly helped this silly mall ever since the Astroplexygon became a freaking cake! I swear, if this happens to the whole town, I'm just going to move and maybe head to Nippyville. Yesterday I had some idiot Slowpoke trying to return a shirt that he didn't even buy here! Oh, and of course no receipt either! Oh yeah, sure, let me buy that crusty, nasty shirt with that idiotic "I'm with stupid" on it from you and you go waste that money on something even dumber while I'm now stuck with your moronic shirt. Cool deal. Oh yeah, that's the kind of thing I live for. Fab-u-lous."

You then ask the Honchkrow if he's seen anything suspicious lately. Something that might have something to do with those insidious Squawkers!

"Not really... although there is one weird thing I guess," he tells you. "It's that Fuzzy Dice Ice Cream truck in parking lot #2. You know, the place where someone always nearly turns other Pokémon into roadkill because they were too busy with their phones posting crap on FaceSpace. That truck's been there for a while and it makes me wonder why would anyone still have one of those while the other side of town has buttloads of ice cream for free!? You'd have to be an idiot to try and sell that here! Might as well be trying to sell air! Or grass! Or bad breath! It's dumb, although after that incident with the Slowpoke, there sure are a lot of dumb Pokémon out there!"

"Cool chat," he tells you, "but I've got to do another round of 'oh, this costumer hung this clothing item in the wrong spot! Gotta have the fun of putting it back in the right place!' Oooh, that's game's my favorite! And I really like the 'pick up from the floor because the customer was too freaking lazy to put it back! Love, love, LOVE that game also! As much as I love smothering myself with oil and kerosene and lighting myself on fire while dancing the tango with a blow-up doll!"

"Well, enjoy the last few days this town has left before it becomes a pile of sugary goo!" he tells you before making his rounds.

Madder the Devious Mimikyu (S: Ghost/Fairy)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowboy (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 0/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/12
Groovy Abilities: Stealth Mode | Perky Stuff!: Browser History Hacking

[Bulbasaur]

Search the (20) Exterior of Bave and Dusters.

[Neo Emolga]

Hmm, what an odd thing what I found. There has to be more to it...right? So first thing, I'm gonna equip the Staryu Hair Clip.

..........Anything?

Then I'll search (24b) Floors 6-10 of The Bibbity Bopple Bop Hotel and try using the Item [Room 800 Key] on Room 800.

You have equipped the Staryu Hair Clip!

You wait to see if anything happens. It does make you feel slightly more... aquatic, but that's all about it does. Though you have a feeling maybe there are other pieces involved with it...

You take the key and decide to head out and see what's going on in the Bibbity Bopple Bop Hotel!

Soren has gained 1 point of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Pink Glitter Snow!

You take the elevator to the 6th floor and check out things there, but it's just more colorful hallways and cutesy cartoon Pokémon characters on the walls just to appeal to those kids. Kids everywhere. You almost get tired of them! A kid Totodile even laughs at your rainbow butt! You zap the little punk a bit and that shuts him up nicely. Move along, twerp!

You just see more of the same on the seventh floor and the eighth floor until you get to that interesting Room 800. It seems like they went for a flying and airplanes theme for this eighth floor. You unlock the room, wondering if you'll find the owner of the room inside, but instead, you don't.

{Hotel Room 800: 800 Key of Course!}
[Room 800 Key] has been used up!

When you step in, it seems like they left in a hurry! Which is kind of understandable considering... well, Squawkers. Not everyone wants to end up as a cinnamon bun or something like that. Or end up trying to sleep and then suddenly the whole building becomes chocolate, which would be a really bad problem being this high up. Yeeeep.

You find a few of their dirty clothes thrown about and it looks like they had already checked out. Might also explain why they didn't care too much about losing their key, though it does mean they HAD to stop for coffee before running out. Hilarious! Guess Daddy really needed that coffee.

You find they left some money in the pocket of one of their pants! Well, they're probably not going to come back for this, so ching-a-ling to you, Pikachu!

$300 Snax$ has been added to the Team Pile!

Ooh! And you find a really nifty fish bowl! You're not sure why this was taken on a vacation trip anyway, but hey, who's to judge!? You decide this is more interesting than most of the other junk, so you take this with you too!

Item [Fish Bowl] has been added to the Team Pile!

Interesting stuff! Well, you check out the rest of the top of the hotel, but it's just more kidding stuff and lots of locked rooms. Well, you're not even sure you'd be able to carry more stuff, so you decide to head back to Peep base and maybe get some more Netflix and chill time.

Soren the Rainbow-Butted Pikachu (S: Electric)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowboy (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: %Staryu Hair Clip%
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 4/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Hollywood Movie Shenanigans

[Neo Emolga]

If I wasn't a killjoy master, I'd say...




THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!




...But I am, and now I'm looking for another boredom cure. Let's walk into the belly of the beast.


SEARCH (43d) Yandil is a Stalker Fine Dining Restaurant.

Smack 'em Susan has gained 1 point of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Pink Glitter Snow!

You head over to the Silver Orange Hotel and decide to check out this rather fancy restaurant they have attached to the hotel called Yandil is a Stalker, featuring a Smeargle dressed in a top coat, top hat, and with a sledgehammer! It's a very fancy place and it has fountains, statues, expensive paintings, and very gaudy chandeliers. And they're playing very fine classical music.

Even though you're not here to eat, you flip through the menu and there's interesting items like the Overkill Fillet Mignon and the Stalker Soup of the Day! And the prices are... well, they're pricy. You could say they're... murder. •_•) ( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

Well, then there's the fact there's a fancy-pants dress code. The dudes are wearing suits and tuxes and the ladies are wearing expensive dresses. And the kids are... well, there are no kids. Not surprising. You walk by a fancily-dressed Nidoqueen and Nidoking and a formally-dressed group of dark-type Pokémon as you look around, but you don't really find anything too out of the ordinary.

You then get to the kitchen, which is, of course, spotless. Like you could eat your food off the floor and that would totally be okay, but they'd still be charging you out the butt for that floor food. And then you see something very interesting. A Linguini Creator! It seems like no one is watching you, so you decide to mess around with it.

{Linguini Creator: =Linguini Creation!=}



After you've had your fun, you decide to head back and enjoy some Netflix and chill, also!

Smack 'em Susan the Spectacular Breloom (M: Grass/Fighting)

Classy: Humiliation Commando
Style: Desperado Cowgirl (4 DMG, 75% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 6/10
Overwhelming Cuteness: 2/10
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Killjoy Master

[Neo Emolga]

There may have been a reason this particular place poofed...

Search (32c) Peachy Beep Elementary School Floors 7-9 (CANDY).

Velo has resisted the 1 point of Overwhelming Cuteness from the Pink Glitter Snow thanks to her Puns of Anarchy Style!

You decide to head over the Peachy Beep Elementary School and see what the fuss is about. And lordy, there's ice cream everywhere. Strawberry ice cream no less! Your favorite flavor! Oh man... you're tempted to take just a little lick only to try it and...

@Strawberry Ice Cream Yay! - ICE (+2 Belly)@
Velo has gained 4 points of Belly from the Strawberry Ice Cream Yay! Amplified because icy tasty things just hit your sweet spot, sugar!

You scarf and gobble that stuff down.

Oof, okay, that's enough. You feel like you really shouldn't have eaten that much but it was delicious nonetheless. You feeling a little full after that and you need to keep going. As you navigate the ice creamy halls, you figure it wasn't really made for a giant Lugia such as yourself, and you find yourself having to hunch over a few times, but you're still able to get around. Probably a good thing you're the only one here, because if this was a hall filled with kids, either they've have to turn around or you'd have to back up!

You decide to head up the seventh floor of this ridiculous ice cream castle that was once a school and find yep, school's out for the summer. And forever. Guess it's good homeschooling is becoming more of a thing? Or you know, the kids could try learning on frozen popsicle desks. Yeah, see how well that works out for them!

On the eighth floor, you find more classrooms frozen over as tasty treats, strawberry no less, and it doesn't look like much survived the frozen dessert disaster. No, no, you don't really want to eat some more. It looks tasty but really, you've had enough!

You get to the top floor and start investigating the roof. It's more of the same, only you feel like your resistance is weakening. You then spot something curious, leather object half buried in the strawberry ice cream, and you take a closer look.

#Extra Strawberry Ice Cream Yay! - ICE (+1 Belly)# Trap 15% Evasion Test: 06 out of 100: FAILED!
Velo has gained 2 points of Belly from the Strawberry Ice Cream Yay! Amplified because icy tasty things just hit your sweet spot, sugar!

You can't help it. So delicious! What the fudge, how did this happen!? It's a wallet covered with more of this downright addictive ice cream and you can't but help yourself to more. Oh, and what's worse is the ice cream slathered on the wallet regenerates as you lick it off! What!? How!? No way!? This is a nightmare! But it's... a delicious nightmare! You manage to pull away just in time.

You check the insides of the wallet and it seems like it belongs to a certain "Penny the Espeon." You wonder just how it ended up here, but you figure you probably should bring it back to Penny. Maybe she'll reward you for your efforts!

#[Penny the Espeon's Wallet] Extra Strawberry Ice Cream Yay! - ICE (+1 Belly)# has been added to the Team Pile!

Okay, time to head back now. That's definitely enough ice cream for today...

Velo the Heroic Lugia (L: Psychic/Flying)

Classy: Guardian Snow Angel
Style: Puns of Anarchy (Overwhelming Cuteness -3 on each Enemy Attack)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 10/12
Overwhelming Cuteness: 0/8
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Hardcore Parkour

[Bulbasaur]

Let's search Warget.

Search (30b) Electronics and gizmos

[Neo Emolga]

Let's search Warget.

Search (30b) Electronics and gizmos

Of course! Who shops at Tal-Mart!? You step outside and nearly get bonked by a doughnut with yummy creamy filling and mmmmm, it just begs to be bit into!

Eddie has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Good stuffs.

You head to Warget and decide to check out their electronics and gizmos. Of course everything is in display cases that'll zap you with hellfire and pain and nine years of bad luck and cold food if you even thought about stealing, but you're a good Bulbasaur and you mind your manners.

WARGET ELECTRONICS AND GIZMOS
$[FitzyBitzy!!!!] 300 Snax$
$[MP8 Player] 200 Snax$
$[BotchWatch] 250 Snaw$
$[iPhony 89] 750 Snax$
$[Pretendo Twitch] 300 Snax$
$[Psychosoft Vex-Box] 300 Snax$
$[Phony Slaystation 4] 500 Snax$
$[Screwloose Screws] 200 Snax$
$[Lapsnap Laptop Computer] 1100 Snax$
$[Big Mothertruckin' Rig Desktop] 2250 Snax$
$[Hecta Friggin' Gaming Desktop Zenith of Awesomeness Omega With More Colored LED Lights Than a Nightclub on Steroids Gaming Setup] 3400 Snax$

You take note of the wonderful selection, though you're not sure how much of this will have a use. Seems like the kind of stuff you'd want to make sure first!

You decide you're just browsing for now. But of course you play for six hours on one of their promotional store displays! The wonderful thing is the store reps are too busy or too lazy to care!

Okay, really, time to go home now. XD

Eddie the Epic Bulbasaur (S: Grass/Poison)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 0/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Browser History Hacking

[Neo Emolga]

Looks like someone can use a sane person to talk to, with all of that.

25 Wedge the Machamp

Interview Rapport: NEUTRAL, VERY INTIMIDATING!
+1 Intimidate (Psychic VS Fighting)
+1 Intimidate (Flying VS Fighting)

You decide it's time to talk to the only real competent cop in town, but first on your way there...!

Velo has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Ah yum, the creamy Oreo cheesecake ones are especially good today!

You find Wedge trying to piece together evidence at his Snippy Dee condo, which is likely because the police station is more of a chocolate gooey candy castle. You waltz in with your top coat and top hat and he freaks out for a second and then sweats. You introduce yourself in song and he just nods. And then you explain you want the latest scoop on the Squawkers because Biggs and Vivi are still trying to figure out how to tie their shoes and learn it's not a good idea to eat glue.

"...Yes," Wedge nods. "Don't mind me, wasn't expecting a legendary Pokémon that could pulverize me in two seconds to just show up. Since it's down to me, I figure I've got my work cut out for me, but if you're willing to help, well, can't argue against that, especially since Officer Biggs and Officer Vivi are just as helpful as using a plastic spoon to lift boulders. Sure, I get that the police station is utterly useless now and we lost virtually everything in that disaster, but any kind of giving up isn't going to get us anywhere."

"I've sure you've heard about Al already," Wedge tells you. "I can confirm the riddles are authentic, but it's a collecting process. I ended up resorting to grabbing one of those stupid fortune cookies for additional clues, and I got one that reads 'can't ignore it and can't sweep it under the rugs, our lovely hero Al just doesn't like bugs.' Obviously a riddle that he's weak against bug types, which should rule out anyone that's not. I've been hunting for others and I told Biggs he needs to be on the lookout for these too, but next thing I know, he's sticking a carrot in his ear."

"The other thing is it's hard to pick up on Squawker patterns, but what happened with Grootz and a few of the others confirmed there's one with some kind of obsession with noodles and turning victims into whole bowls of them," Wedge explains. "Then there's another that's similar, only with cookies. I think that one's name is Cookie Monger if I'm not mistaken and if my findings are right."

"I still need to confirm the rest of this and recollect what we lost," Wedge shrugs. "Take anything Biggs and Vivi tell you with a grain of salt, because they're not the brightest bulbs in the box. You're better off relying on your own eyes and ears for that."

He then gets back to piecing things together, and you decide to head back and check out what fun is going on back at Peep base!

Velo the Heroic Lugia (L: Psychic/Flying)

Classy: Guardian Snow Angel
Style: Puns of Anarchy (Overwhelming Cuteness -3 on each Enemy Attack)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/12
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/8
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Hardcore Parkour

[Neo Emolga]

I'll search (21) DeeeBeee Memorial Park (CANDY)

You decide to check out what this silly DeeeBeee Memorial Park is all about and what nefarious secrets it might be hiding! But of course, like everyone else today...

Carly has gained 4 points of Belly from the Overly-Delicious Rain of Mega Doughnuts!

Who doesn't love a good chocolate glazed doughnut!? That powdery one looks good too! Why choose when you can have them all!?

Okay, enough of these things.

You cruise on over to the park itself and lovely, it's a whole green and chocolate-flaked wonderland of mint chocolate chip ice cream! And you can't help but... try it.

@Tasty Tasty Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream - ICE (+3 Belly)@

Carly has gained 1.5 points of Belly from the Tasty Tasty Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream! Reduced damage because you're a blazing hot tiger dog!

Okay, while it's not as delicious to you as it might be to some other Pokémon, between this and the doughnuts, you're feeling like you've probably done enough indulging for today. And tomorrow. And perhaps the day after that, too.

The park had some lovely memorials devoted to the prestigious Doctor DeeeBeee, but they're a wreck now because what hasn't melted has been eaten a bit! Doctor DeeeBeee would be so disappointed! And the trees are now yummy chocolate as well. It's just tragic and you sure hope this Squawker effect is reversible. If not, well... crapola.

You wade your way through gooey ice cream and you find something interesting on the chocolate path that used to be made of stones. Huh, looks like funky color pieces.

Why, it's a =A Colorful Jigsaw Puzzle!=

You gather up the pieces and decide to head on back, wondering what piecing them together will get you!

Carly the Courageous Growlithe (M: Fire)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 5.5/10
Overwhelming Cuteness: 4/10
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Memes