The Last Poster Wins! [v8]

**The Nonexistent Tazz** · 01-13-2014, 02:27 AM

<OK, Sonic...It looks like somebody intercepted you for some reason. As a result, I have a good feeling you are nowhere near where you->

*Finds S2's position, which is nowhere near where he wanted. Hajime is in the correct location.*

...

<OK, looks like you are actually NOWHERE near where you want to be. Whatever did this signaled you out because of the dimensional needle. Smart. As for where you are...You're not going to like it, but judging on your description, you're in an execution courtyard, where a bada** comes to kick your a** in one-on-one. Only one person has ever survived against the kind of foes they send after you, and that was when the foe was very rusty...Prepare for anything. Prepare for EVERYTHING...Oh!>

<They're smart enough to make it tough to pull you out, but I can send stuff in. Now, I KNOW THIS WEAPON IS RIDICULOUS, BUT IT IS POWERFUL LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS, SO JUST MAN UP AND GET READY TO SHOOT S**T WITH IT.>

*Sends S2 the weapon, conjuring it up with his high IMAGINATION stat.*

*The weapon appears in front of S2, hovering onimously...But, insanely, it is an Uzi made to fire Pez. This is what you get for having a guy who swears he doesn't exist give you a weapon.*

**Rin Kagamine** · 01-13-2014, 02:30 AM

*stops crying* Wut. WHAAAAAT!? WHAT IS GOING ON!? I NEVER GET TO KICK A** WITH WEAPONS THINGS!

But that's probably a good thing...*snipping scissors in the air*

**Sonic20** · 01-13-2014, 02:30 AM

@Rin "Why exactly are you crying?" "Is it really that painful to run out of OJ?"

*looks at weapon* "Yeah, I think I'll be fine without it."

"Though something has intercepted me, and now that my vision is clear it's much more Metalic. It's got a sort of purple generator, and a large tube shooting a white liquid through various portals."

"Also, there's a magikarp picture on the ceiling."

**Rin Kagamine** · 01-13-2014, 02:31 AM

@Sonic20

IT'S NOT THE OJ! I swear! *gulps down more oj*

**The Nonexistent Tazz** · 01-13-2014, 02:33 AM

<OK...What's on the floor? A picture of a Gyarados?>

<Also, trust me, the Pez Uzi is stronger than a regular gun by a mile and a half. If you need a hole in something, that'll do it.>

*Teleports more OJ to RK*

**Rin Kagamine** · 01-13-2014, 02:35 AM

More? MORE ORANGE JUICE!?

H-hold on...I th-think I've been d-drinking to m-much, nya...*runs away*

**Sonic20** · 01-13-2014, 02:37 AM

"Nope... wait a minute... Is it... LORD GODKARP?!"

"I should have known. God of the worst pokemon. Jealously, so he must have been planning this all along..."

**The Nonexistent Tazz** · 01-13-2014, 02:44 AM

<Actually, he died of tuburculosis 3 months after Sunkern was declared the world's most worthless Pokemon instead of Magikarp, which was 6 months ago...So that must mean his right hand, MACHOKARP, is in the vicinity. He runs an organization that makes white paint, which explains the odd machine...>

<Now, MACHOKARP may not be even remotely responsible for what is happening, and will likely be as confused as you are as to how his white paint manufactory got sent to an execution courtyard, but MACHOKARP's death will trigger your release, and vice versa. Summon him by blowing it up to hell. Just use the Dimensional Needle on the purple orb. MACHOKARP's only weakness, like LORD GODKARP, is to DIABETES, so candy is a supereffective hit...Get what I mean?>

*Hopes S2 gets the message*