The Eon Academy [S.S. Wishmaker Side-Story]

[[Desolate Divine]]

Finally caught up, whew!

And…

Spoiler:

Season 2 Epilogue 1 was amazing, that whole incident with the poachers felt like an intense Jason Statham action/thriller movie only with Pokémon, which once again reminded me of how cool and awesome that kind of environment would be for a potential movie or game (but like heck Nintendo/Game Freak would ever go along with that, but one can dream). I was also not quite expecting that to end the way it did (wasn’t expecting Jon to blow the captain away), but heck, that element of surprise is definitely one of the charms of this story. I could see so many situations where a reader may think they’ll know how things end using tropes and past movie trends as a basis, but then there’s a big “nuh uh” and you deliver with that great element of surprise.

I like the way you handled how training is going for Deoxys and the young Lugia (and many of the other Pokémon as well, but Deoxys and Lugia especially). SOOO many stories easily neglect this level of care and attention to detail and realism and assume hey, once captured, training Pokémon of that caliber should be a breeze, right? You definitely dash in the much-needed logic and realism into these situations (Deoxys has a stressful past and Lugia is very young and inexperienced) and it genuinely makes it a much better read, because it has the potential to work or the potential to fail with consequences, but there’s plenty of in-between scenarios that could arise as well. You make it clear that anything can happen with these situations.

The pacing for the battles is perfect, you can tell Jon and these teens are training their butts (and their Pokémon’s butts) off HARD for their future careers and to be good role models for the students they’re teaching. These battles are a great length and really capture the well-thought out and unique strategies they have, but without going either too slow or too fast. The pacing on these is definitely in a nice Goldilocks zone where you show how they’re developing, but you also keep the story going and it doesn’t make the whole thing come to a screeching halt. Plus, the insertion of the battles is nicely placed in with the other subplots that are going on. The reader gets a nice serving of battles, then a good serving of subplot development (both the peaceful and intense situations), and so on in a nice, alternating style that doesn’t dwell in one area too often or for too long. KEEP THAT, that’s one of the main features that I like about this story in a world where so many Pokémon fan fictions I’ve read in the past fumble on this kind of pacing and story development.

Moreover on the subplots, I like how you have several of these interesting, suspenseful, and intriguing subplots going on at the same time and you know exactly when and how to leave them with satisfying cliffhangers that make it easy for the reader to get pulled in and say “ok, I gotta keep going to find out how this turns out.” I’m genuinely wondering how things are going to go for Latios’s mental health considering everything the poor dude has had to deal with and how all these stressful incidents are taking a toll on this usually happy-go-lucky (and sometimes comically reckless!) Pokémon. What’s also good is each subplot adds value and substance to the overall direction of the story (unlike say Walking Dead where it feels like entire seasons come and go and feel totally irrelevant later on). Nothing in this story feels like filler or extra baggage. As I’ve seen in the past chapters, EVERY subplot occurrence and incident has some bearing on the characters and how it affects them and the academy as a whole. This is definitely brilliant writing with this regard and feels like everything that’s going on brings value and significance to the story.

Great work overall and I’m looking forward to the retelling of the Spiritwater RP when you get to that part (please, take whatever creative liberty you’d like with that, I know this is in good hands for all the reasons I mentioned above). Still can’t believe it’s only been about a year since the initial Wishmaker RP began and look how far and how deeply it has developed, many thanks to this story, all the well-built characters you’ve created, and the writing expertise you’ve implemented here. As Jon would say, you definitely didn’t take any half measures on this!

Double thumbs up on this great story, many thanks for making this a satisfying read!

Haha glad that you have liked it! I think what you're noticing is just the amount of planning I have started to put in compared to when this began. Season 1 had a few pages largely covering basic traits for character and plot points for each episode capping at 3.5 pages. Season 2 had this as well as some more details and towards the end (particularly the epilogues) a very in depth summary, capping out at 6.5 pages.

Season 3 is at nearly fifteen pages, as I've started doing a scene by scene plan, knowing exactly which scenes I want in an episode and what happens in them. Only started in Episode 2 however as I am writing Episode 3 now (which is one of my favourites I have written in a while) it is making it much easier to tie in bits and pieces from other episodes. Also been doing s lot of thinking about Season 4 and 5. Mostly around the Diamond Ladies and how they go interacting with each of the interns and such.

Lots coming now I am back in the swing of things. I will say this much; there won't be many well planned battles until the end of Season 3, just because they wear me out to plan and write haha Season 2 had so many, which is why it took me so long to start Season 3. So season 3 is taking more of a personal development (or regression) route with some huge battles planned for the end which I am already planning in great depth so they should be mad by the time we actually get there.

For now I am keen to finish episode 3. Lots going on that will be expanded on in Season 3.