The Eon Academy [S.S. Wishmaker Side-Story]

[[Desolate Divine]]

I finished reading the first season of the Eon Academy earlier this weekend and had a lot to say about what I read. I can add a spoiler tag if you think it is necessary, but I think that the obnoxious length of this post should scare off most people.

This story has a fantastic premise. There are so many wonderful side plots and character development that add to this story, but the underlying idea that the battling style of pokémon trainers has stagnated to an alarming degree is intriguing, as is the proposed solution. Jon Drake, will help the next generation of trainers to bring innovation and creativity to the field. The way that you maintain and develop this idea gives this story an energetic backdrop to a very enjoyable slice of life story about young trainers growing and developing in battling and as people. The curriculum that Jon lays out is a solid one, and includes a lot of things that are present in other stories or RPs along similar lines, but with the added twist of media relations. What sets the Eon Academy apart is that you (and, by extension, Jon) really know your stuff about the subjects and about how to teach children. Throughout the story, Jon teaches life lessons almost to a greater extent than he teaches his students about pokémon battling. I remember this ability of yours being demonstrated in a GCeA story of yours I read a long time ago, and this story offered many, many chances to do so again!

I'd be very interested to know which GCeA story you're referring to! I wrote that many, and my character in that (who started as a lazy carbon copy of myself, and evolved into a traumatised wreck trying to do what is right even when it may not look that way) had some similarities to Jon, but I'd say Jon is far more well rounded and believable as a character than him xD

Funnily enough, my day job is youth work in a church. So there are parts of that role that find their way in the story. That and I have a history in education (only just) so that plays into it to. That and I do a concerning amount of googling. My google history is filled with plenty of searches that if one didn't know about this, they would be having me institutionalised xD

Your premise was also interesting because you did such a good job of balancing the game components with the aspects of a real-life system. For example, when Justin is considering which legendary pokémon to add to his team, he looks at its stats, but also his personal battling style and how it fits in with his team. He is not seeking to build a team from scratch, but looking to compliment his existing partners. Furthermore, you not only have the consideration of insurance, public relations, and crime which would entail from a world full of pokémon, but also the moral dilemmas that are raised by familiar hallmarks of the competitive battling scene like breeding and IVs. That is something that has long scared me off from any kind of competitive battling because to me all of that undermines the idea of pokémon being living creatures worthy of love and respect regardless of their make-up, and thus becomes a world in which I do not want to live.

The battles that you described are always thrilling and serve to showcase the characters. The Day Zero, midterm, and livestreamed battles in particular showed how the students developed over the summer and applied what they learned. You highlighted double-battles, the queen of battles, and multi-battles, the holy grail, which I greatly appreciate! I came into the story thinking that it would be dominated by concerns about Lance and Rayquaza and it was a pleasant surprise that this was not the case! It was very nice that the battles in this season were almost never high-stakes affairs, except for the pride of the trainers and the demonstration of their education. If battles are not fun for the characters, it will be harder for them to be fun for a reader (or livestream audience!), and you crossed that hurdle easily. One shortfall was that the battle with Lance's goons seemed compressed when they invaded the campus. The Hydreigon was specifically built up as a big threat and then easily dispatched.

I'm glad to hear you appreciated this! I love Pokemon but funnily enough, in terms of anime, I much prefer Digimon for the simple reason that it actually grew with its audience. Whilst seeing Pikachu strike Swellow with a thunder attack to give it Thunder Armour, or seeing Team Rocket sustain every manner of injury, for it only to be shaken off, was appealing as an eight year old, unlike Ash, I and many others of my generation aged. Meanwhile Digimon had the first season's main characters as kids aged ten, plus minus a year or two. The next season had all but the youngest take on more of a mentoring role whilst a new generation took lead, but still being available to help. The third iteration was with the main characters in their final year of high school (plus minus a few years), and this point, the subject matter goes to heavier questions such as whether their intervention is worth the damage the fighting causes, and instead of character growth hingeing on them identifying their natural strengths (like in Seasons 1 and 2), it is based on them having their weaknesses forced into their field of view, and them having to come to terms with them. Then the final iteration with these characters

Spoiler:

has them in university, and discovering that as they have gotten older, they have triggered a timer on how long their Digimon can remain with them. The more the Digimon battle, the faster the timer goes down, and the Digimon who disappears first, is the one of the tamer who refuses to fight, thinking she is buying time, but really, making the most adult decision, and causing it to plummet even further. And there is no happy ending. The two main protagonists of the film make the difficult choice to do what they know is right, knowing that as a result, the last thing they want to come to pass will. And when it does, it isn't some grand farewell, but instead their Digimon disappearing out of frame, mid conversation, which just freaking hurts.

Rant about Digimon aside, all this to say is that the Pokemon Company (likely for the purpose of not wanting to risk putting children (and parents) off the franchise as a whole for the sake of the older generation) has neglected to actually have media grow with its original audience, and as such, a lot of these more complex moral questions are not broached. With the Eon Academy, I intended to create a story of growing up (both for Jon, who for the longest time, was partially still stuck in his past, and the students), the good, the bad and the ugly. And where insurance, PR, crime and eugenics fit in is not a clear cut answer.

You've picked up on a trend that I noticed I used with Eon Academy: I try to make sure that there is appropriate time of growth before the growth itself is actually needed. And honestly, if I could change anything about Season 1, it would be Lance's involvement and that battle. Fact is that it was included as a method for Chris' own link to Lance to come to light, but also for Chris to come up with his own conclusion about what had happened, and honestly, for the clunkiness of the way the battle itself played out, as well as the consequences (such as having the Academy attacked, but figuring out how to not have consequences of that such as police presence interfere with the story in later episodes), I kind of wish that instead, it had been something more along the lines of... I don't even know. I started writing this thinking what if Lance did something like request a meeting with Jon and then do something deranged, but I honestly don't even know.

It felt like five students was the perfect number to follow with Jon, Alyssa, Steven, and a few others, so I am curious what things will look like with more students in the next summer. That being said, one thing that I would have liked to see more of was the personalities of the pokémon that the trainers had. Latios got his moments, but overall it felt like the other pokémon were neglected. We hardly saw them outside of their pokémon balls just being cared for, even the Alolan vulpix which Chris received, which I think was a missed opportunity.

You did a great job hinting at ongoing plot threads ahead of time as well. Little touches like Chris' team being mostly dragons hinted at his family connection with Lance, and Justin's repeated thefts of Abbee's phone also had a great payoff down the line. There were only a few times that it felt as though things did not pan out. I thought that Jon using Rayquaza to save Chris despite the risk of being seen, and later introducing the boy to the legendary pokémon would pay off, but neither did as I expected.

Yeah, I definitely can say that including Pokemon outside of battles, and sometimes just general work-horse type stuff is a weakness in my writing. The amount of times I write something, publish it and realise that effectively, the story I have just written could quite easily exist in a world where Pokemon don't (such as the episode with Abbee's dad's funeral, or Dylan visiting home, and the truth about his homelife coming out), which I guess is because I tend to place a lot of stock in the fact that the characters are human, all of which being complex and messy, and that tends to dominate my focus. That, and honestly, I struggle maintaining unique identities of the characters present. One of my concerns with later seasons is that post a lot of personal development, the male characters in some ways are very similar, especially when things are lower stakes, and honestly, I need to force their differences into the light. Part of it is explained as by Season 5, all of them had had years with Jon as their mentor, and whilst they all bring different histories and personalities to the table, each has looked up to the same man for years, especially during formative years, so it makes sense there would be some similarities. But also, I know that in GCeA I fell into the habit of relying on difficult circumstances and high stakes to develop my character further, with little reprieve between.

In terms of hints, Abbee's phone and Chris' team were definitely planned. In terms of Rayquaza, the payoff was intended to be less obvious, in that it is not as visible looking at Chris himself, but Charlotte's perception of his growth, and after Charlotte's own experience, how Chris (who was honestly more likely to cause friction between the pair) begins to see her, and actually admit how she is responsible for him wanting to grow.

Justin felt like the weakest character to me during the main story, so I was happy to see him get an epilogue which developed him more and even gave him a bit of romance. During the bulk of the story, I was almost certain that he was going to be in league with Lance or something because I just had a hard time understanding what his purpose in the story was. Seeing how he battled against Regieleki made me wish that there had been a graduation battle for the Eon Academy. It still felt like it was too late in getting him that valuable time in the sun. Plus, he didn't get a kiss either for New Year's or for goodbye, what's up with that?

Honestly, I think that Justin desperately needed the Epilogue, as during Season 1, especially earlier days, I felt like he was far too similar to Chris, the biggest difference being Chris' pride and Justin's indifference. Part of the reason I didn't do a graduation battle was that I know I would have been too tempted to, in light of him having some growth in light of what happened with Abbee and the whole phone saga, give some development in terms of battling capability he didn't deserve. In terms of rankings at the start of the summer, Chris and Charlotte were tied for first (due to their competitive nature, Chris' natural talent and Charlotte's hard working nature), Abbee and Justin tied for second (though in hindsight, this makes less sense), and Dylan in last (due to his own circumstances providing less opportunities, and honestly, learning to battle and capturing Pokemon only being a means to get away from home). By the end of Season 1, it was still Charlotte and Chris tied for first (though having gotten much stronger), Abbee sitting in second (having gotten stronger herself), and Dylan and Justin tied for third, both due to Dylan having started further behind than the others, and not being too driven to battle himself, but during the story having a solid teacher and curriculum allowing him to grow, and Justin not making use of the opportunity, and not growing at the same rate as the others, allowing Abbee to pull ahead, and Dylan to catch up. All of this to say, I think that I chose to skip the battle as it may give a lasting answer to who is better between Charlotte and Chris, but also, I needed Dylan and Justin both to still be near the bottom, and the battles prior, as well as previous development had already created that ranking which I wanted to keep in place. Additionally, whilst nine months passes in world between them leaving and returning, there was too little of a gap between Seasons 1 and 2 for the person reading, and I wanted to use the opening of Season 2 to show growth instead. However, the fact he battled as well as he did in the epilogue was meant to illustrate that he had made use of the time between leaving the Academy, and battling Regieleki, and prove largely to himself that Jon wasn't wrong to have faith in him.

As for the lack of a kiss, that is something that will be touched on breifly in Episode 2, Season 1, but also later in Season 2.

Dylan was a sleeper hit in this story, and the resolution of his situation with his step-father also gave Jon a great way to showcase how he has developed. The man who beat Lance into a hospital bed was willing to wait for Dylan's parent to come to him and provoke a fight instead of seeking one out. It may have ended not dissimilarly, but the circumstances leading up to the comeuppance did demonstrate some growth. It will be good for Dylan to spend more time with Jon and his family, plus it makes sense for him to join the staff to cover an area where Jon is a little weaker. More students will mean more staff, although Jon's offer for all the inaugural class to serve as staff did feel as though it made Dylan's resolution less special. It also felt like Dylan was missing from the second epilogue even though it would have been great to see how he and Alyssa's family adjust to each other over the holidays. I understand that it was a Jon chapter but still, food for thought.

Honestly, Dylan has always been my favorite character of the students (though each holds a special place for me for different reasons), and Dylan will show a lot of growth in the next few seasons (even as soon as Season 2). Honestly, the reasons or Dylan being missing from the second Epilogue is that originally, I intended to have a prologue for Season 2 focusing on him and Abbee, however decided that firstly, it would be too much side content considering the length of Justin's epilogue, and secondly, I wanted his growth to be as much of a surprise to the reader as it is to his classmates upon his return, and having the planned prologue (in which he visits Abbee for New Year's Eve) would have broken down what is supposed to be a large and surprising development into two smaller, less surprising developments, you know? And by having the growth happen off screen, in a way that makes sense (dude is literally living in a loving home for the first time in many years, and actually has a good (depending on who you ask) male role model in his life), it also helps the reader understand just how much time has passed (as you especially, reading it as its already been released, may go straight from Season 1 to Season 2 in a single night, in which case it may be easy to fall into the trap of subconsciously viewing it as a direct continuation, when really there has been a major space. Heck, even I fall into the trap of forgetting that they spend three months together at the Academy, before living the next nine months of their lives seperate. The fact that none have ever referenced any friends they have outside of the Academy, or barely talk about their families unless it is a point of some trauma, is evidence of this haha.

Speaking of Jon, he also got plenty of character despite his role as the mentor figure. The second epilogue was a bow on top of everything, but even before that there were places where his development was prominent. Things like his advice to the students in chapter twelve ("People are s**t, and if you want to survive in this world, you gotta have each others back.") and his plan for world domination in chapter five highlight his cynical nature, but with the understanding that he uses those expectations to do something positive instead of merely wallowing in the negativity. That makes him a very interesting character in my book! Where he goes forward after working on his relationship with his dad will be very interesting. In the S.S. Wishmaker RP, it seemed as though he introduced himself to every character with his abusive childhood, so that was obviously a big part of his self-conception.

Putting this here, but in terms of Jon dealing with Dylan's stepdad, I very nearly went down a different route. It nearly played out as Jon, furious at what he has discovered, goes to Dylan's house, intending on doing to Bill what he did to Lance on the S.S. Wishmaker, getting to the front door, but making the decision not to, and instead turning away. However, I felt that it would be contrary to growth in Jon already shown on the one hand (the fact he is actually seeking out violence), and also forcing too much growth on the other (as Jon is still the sort who is willing to throw down if he percieves a need to). The way it ended up playing out suited far better. The growth Jon shows by not just throwing fists and seeking out a fight is in line with his character as shown in the prior episodes, but also the fact that when Bill shows up, and refuses to listen to reason, before getting violent towards Jon himself, Jon is willing to use force, shows that he is still the same Jon Drake. Albeit having grown and become more self-controlled.

Honestly, that nature of Jon being cynically but wanting to do something with it, is largely derived from my own xD I'd never consider myself an optimist, and tend to prepare for the worst in almost all respects. But I also try to use that to do something positive instead, which is something I put into my youth work.

In terms of Jon's introductions in the S.S. Wishmaker, honestly, that was more so my own need to grow as a writer, and the fact that Jon was not a very fleshed out character outside of his history. Heck, even early on in the Eon Academy, the go to isn't his abusive childhood but instead his title of High Seas Champion. But its nice to know it can be interpreted as a personal thing of Jon, and not just slightly lazy writing xD

Besides Jon, Charlotte was my favorite character of this season. I loved her struggle with Chris and the deeper issue behind their rivalry introduced with friendly banter. How you handled Abbee's grief and Dylan's abuse were very well done, but I think that you covered some less frequently explored ground with examining Charlotte's feelings of inadequacy compared to a rival. The payoff was initially brutal, but ultimately beautiful. Her rushing Luxray to learn a new technique contrasted wonderfully with the patience she showed when raising her Feebas and deciding whether to evolve it.

I had never even considered the fact that Luxray and Feebas were parallels, so thanks for pointing it out. And honestly, I think that the fact that her decision to allow Feebas to wait ended up being evidence that Charlotte exists outside of her rivalry with Chris, and that that plot point didn't make up her whole identity (honestly, like Jon's abuse early on in the story, or Justin's own overall inferiority complex, manifesting as him simply not giving a s**t in Season 1), but instead a complex part of a complex person.

Yet another thing that your story has done very well thus far is making the canon characters of gym leaders and champions feel like real people, while also not letting them dominate the spotlight. All of the original characters in this story feel like they are able to share a scene with figures like Steven Stone without being overshadowed, even Justin!

I'm glad to hear you feel that way. Honestly, a pet gripe of mine is when characters are made that have no personality themelves but instead buy it from other characters. Somebody who exists and has significance because they are "Misty's boyfriend" or even the fact that Chris is Lance's cousin, I feel could be a little cheap. Heck, you can see where things with Justin and Candice are going, but honestly, I'm glad I left it so late for that to come to fruition (and there is still a lot to go from where you are) because it allowed Justin's character to create his own significance independent of a canon character, and there are other instances that come up later.

A few points of critique before I return to the unrestrained gushing. In the fifth chapter I thought that some sentences read awkwardly when it was so dialogue-heavy and multiple characters were referenced rather quickly. It is something I would keep an eye out for in the future. The mention of specific websites like Twitter can be useful, but they also risk dating the story should those sites fall out of favor, like a Harry Potter fanfiction in which Harry checks his Myspace account. There is a lot of use in putting those ideas in your story, and I would love to see some exploration of the positives and negatives of social media for trainers (maybe in one of Alyssa's lectures?), but it is just something I would recommend caution around. Stanley Kubrick thought that IBM and the Soviet Union would dominate the year 2001.

Less critiques and more nitpicky areas include my thinking that Chris' family ties to Lance would not be as surprising given the amount of gossip that the average civilian knows about League figures in the games, and that there does not seem to be a reason to keep that information a secret unless, like Jon, you are actively trying to keep a low profile. The team of dragons at least should have tipped someone off. The other thing is that, going back to the idea of developing the pokémon characters more, I would have liked to see Jon use his ability to talk to pokémon in order to help Charlotte and her Luxray cope with its hospitalization.

I'm going to respond to this by sharing a quote from my feedback from my lecturer on my last essay that I submitted for this semester of university.

Good introduction, you set the scene and problem well, just watch the length of your sentences, it may be worth breaking some of the concepts apart for clarity.

You've discovered something that is a weakness of mine, even outside of fiction writing and in my study as well. Honestly, I think it's partially due to the fact that even when I speak, I tend to string that many sentences together, and talk naturally fast that I can do it and people are more likely to misunderstand due to my pace than the sheer amount stuck together. Something I am trying to work on XD

Funnily enough, I didn't ever plan for social media to play such a huge role in the Eon Academy, but given it is something that exists in our world with such huge influence, but is never referenced in Pokemon (like insurance, major crime or eugenics), I enjoy the interest it cultivates. And again, the use of social media only grows deeper in Season 2 onwards XD

In terms of it being obvious about Lance and Chris in world, that was tricky. I hinted towards Steven recognising Chris' surname (which itself is annoying as I have intentionally tried to not give surnames to canon characters without them, by using in world quirks as well as avoidance to not allude too much to the fact that nobody knows what Cynthia's surname is), by it being the same as Clair's (who effectively got that because if it were Chris' surname, and I haven't gone out of my way to indicate Chris may come from a broken or blended family which could explain it not being her surname). My headcanon which I haven't written in yet, is that Chris and Lance's parents who are siblings are different gender and both married, allowing Chris and Lance to have different surnames. But honestly, I think Jon wouldn't have even known Clair's surname or known her as a Gym Leader, let alone known she was Lance's cousin, as he left Johto as a teenager sixteen years prior (well before Clair would have been Gym Leader), and only travelled Kanto, before travelling, and then permanently settling in Hoenn. In terms of the students knowing Gym Leaders, its mostly Abbee and Charlotte, both of whom live in an age of social media, and have stable enough home-lives that the names of current gym leaders aren't insignificant by comparison.

The missed opportunity of Jon being able to speak to Pokemon stems in world from the fact that it was on record that Jon was not among those transformed (in terms of league reports) and at this point the only known Shadowcraft users who could transform him are dead, and for Jon to slip up and show he understands Pokemon to too many people could give away the fact the Diamond Ladies are still alive. However, really, it goes back to what I said before. I tend to focus too much on the people and end up writing a lot of content that practically could exist without Pokemon existing at all XD

Going forward it will be great to see these characters in mentor roles, and to see what other seeds that you planted blossomed, especially seeds which I may not have noticed at the time! My big prediction is that Victini's teaming up with Abbee is going to draw more attention to the relationship between Jon and the Diamond Ladies, maybe even leading to their rediscovery.

Your story and writing have been very enjoyable, but also very intimidating. It makes me worried about my own ability to tell a compelling Pokémon story. But your story also contains its own answer to my dilemma in another of Jon's lessons. Motivation cannot be found in comparison with another, but in the desire to be one's own best.

Life does not always end in finales, and I think that this season ended in a nice, bittersweet way, much like a real summer camp. Thank you for this story, and I am looking forward to starting on the next season!

It's funny because the mentor roles will also be a point of growth for them, both in the sort and long term. Even in Season 5, there are instances of the way they mentor their students being reflective of their own character and histories. Heck, most of what I find myself learning, is what I am preparing to teach the youth I work with.

Glad to hear you're looking forward to Season 2. I'll be real, the weaknesses you have noticed, in terms of long sentences and Pokemon being overlooked in favour of human characters, does not disappear. In some ways it improves, in others it doesn't. But having done another read of Eon Academy in the last few months (editing a few small things like punctuation mistakes and spelling errors), I will say the story does improve. At Season 2 the characters are introduced and the reader understands them more implicitly. Which means that I can do far more with the time had with them than in Season 1, and honestly, I feel like it shows.

Lastly, I want to highlight some of my favorite lines from the season!
In first place: "Nine times out of ten, nothing good comes out of someone calling me Christopher." - This is one of the best introductions for a character that I have had the pleasure of reading. It hints at Chris's history and personality in one beautifully economical sentence!

In second place: "I really hope the media don’t hear about this,” Steven joked. “Hoenn Champion and High Seas Champion, trusted to keep region safe, don’t realize they can have their Metagross and Latios levitate furniture. Carries it manually a hundred meters…"

My third favorite line, from the first epilogue: Regieleki was constantly producing enough electricity to potentially power the entire Galar region, which shocked Justin immensely. - This is a great pun.

Finally, my fourth favorite line, also from the epilogue: "Hey, snowflake!" Justin called out. "Come get some!" - I just like how unapologetically goofy this was. It definitely felt like something a teenager would say.

Next up: Season Two!

I'm curious to hear more of your favorite quotes! I'll be real, third place was completely unplanned, and I hadn't even noticed it!

Keen to hear your thoughts of Season 2!