ULTIMATE Battle Arena for Devolution Battle Royale 2!

[Noblejanobii]

Hahaha wow that really is beautiful. Freed from constant battles with Arnisd and take down a legendary. Only in the DBR!

We're just gonna devolve Neo for now, but we can't go without a little chaos, so let's draw from the deck and see what mayhem it brings!

[C0L0R3D]

…I find it a tad concerning one battle or so after I land a Stalker combo on my wheel Aglome shows up. But hey, I guess we’re kinda in Stalker spirit now.

[AgloMe Oen]

Hahaha wow that really is beautiful. Freed from constant battles with Arnisd and take down a legendary. Only in the DBR!

We're just gonna devolve Neo for now, but we can't go without a little chaos, so let's draw from the deck and see what mayhem it brings!

G͂ͧo͈͉͈̟̞̻o͖̳d̙! It makes me̴̢ͯ͒͂͟ woñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀der if he would make for a very tasty o̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚mele̴̢ͯ͒͂͟t. You know, with so̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚me Grumpig bacon and some me̴̢ͯ͒͂͟aty Miltank bits. T͈̰̏ͥha̩̣̝t̹̠͈ͦ̽ͭͭͅ'̲̝̳̙̲͖ͫ̓ͤ͊̄̈s̺̳̦̼͂̋̀͐ m̳y̅ͦͫ̀ fͣ̎ͫă͉͈͓̼̮̌̊ͯͨ̚ͅv̇͐̾͗́̊͋ǒ͍̰̘̚̚r̩̙̤̤̯̖͌ͩ̃ͯ̚̚i͈̱ͤ̏ t̗̓e͙͕͓̓̊͌!

But ñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀ow let’s see̴̢ͯ͒͂͟ what chao̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚s you’re pulling out!

NOBLEJANOBII draws from the deck añ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀d the fate̴̢ͯ͒͂͟ is revealed…

#12 The Borrower!
THE BORROWER! - You get the Someoñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀e Else’s Wheelie Item, which allows yo̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚u to Wheel someoñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀e using another player’s Wheel (even their own)!

Hey, like the idea of throwing arñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀isd s͚̥̼ͪ̉ͭç͇̠̘̪̫͇̺͗ͣ͑͛̅͛ͤr͑͋ͩ͡ë̺̗̪́͆̂a̘̹ͪͬm͉̝̭̼̻i̤̺n ̰̱̜g̦̹͖̳̻͙̍̀̄̇̊ͦ into his own Wheel? Hey, I like the idea of picking whoe̴̢ͯ͒͂͟ver’s Wheel is the WORST and dishing this little bit o̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚n them. Sounds like damñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀ good fun!

You have̴̢ͯ͒͂͟ fuñ̰̭͔̞̲̥̱̥́͌̃̑ͩ͐̀ with that mo̮̮̬̯̥̬͇͎͔͈̠̜̳͊̍̆̂̊̋͊̐ͥ͐̅̒̚nstrosity now!

[AgloMe Oen]

The audience is N̫̖͚̯̝̜̣̤͕͈ͯ̂͌̍ͮ͐̽ͧ͐̿O̞̙̗͖̻̟͓̖Ṭ͖̦͎͎̘̳̪̟̺̮ entertained enough! More s̳͕l͑aͧ̒ṷ̖̥̄̒̃g̟̤h͍t͋͂͑ͮ̈́̌e͂̄͛ͩr̪̣̩ͥ͆̉ required!

Š̻E̘ͯA̪͕̹̎͋ͧ̽ͅS̙̯O̫͖̖̭͇̝̘̒ͯ̓̉ͥͧ̑N̘̯̳͈̘̓̀̈́̋ͬ ̦̦͚̬ͨ̿ͤ̈6̠̤͔̲̤̄̏ͣ͐̓6̹̻6̯͚

#1 NEO EMOLGA: AS CINCCINO
SUPERPOWERS:
SMART COOKIE [LEVEL 2] – Every time you make an attack that would generate a self-damaging result (not very effective/no effect), you have a 66% chance of stopping yourself!
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#2 CHAKRAMASTER: AS SYLVEON
SUPERPOWERS:
SMART COOKIE [LEVEL 2] – Every time you make an attack that would generate a self-damaging result (not very effective/no effect), you have a 66% chance of stopping yourself!
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#3 NOBLEJANOBII: AS SHINX
SUPERPOWERS:
COMPENSATOR [LEVEL 1] – Add three more stages of Pokémon to your Lineups!
RAGE MODE [LEVEL 1] (CURRENT STREAK: 0) - After a losing streak of 2, you get +2 HP for all future battles and you attack twice for the first 5 turns. When you win, the buffs are removed until you hit a loss streak of 2 or more again.
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#4 SCYTHERWOLF: AS AMPHAROS
SUPERPOWERS:
FRENZY [LEVEL 1] – During battles, you attack twice for the first 10 turns!
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#5 SLICKSLACK: AS PALPITOAD
SUPERPOWERS:
WHEEL MASTER [LEVEL 1] – ALWAYS have the Wheel option after winning and Wheel people, including yourself, as much as you like! No Wheelie items needed for you!
ACTIVE BUFFS: MIGHTY SHIELD
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#6 VOLTAIRE MAGNETON: AS WOOPER
SUPERPOWERS:
WHEEL MASTER [LEVEL 1] – ALWAYS have the Wheel option after winning and Wheel people, including yourself, as much as you like! No Wheelie items needed for you!
ACTIVE BUFFS: MIGHTY SHIELD
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#7 ARNISD: AS CHIKORITA
SUPERPOWERS:
YES, I LIFT, BRO [LEVEL 1] - Your Max HP for each battle is increased by 1!
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

#8 SHRUIKAN: AS FENNEKIN
SUPERPOWERS:
COMPENSATOR [LEVEL 1] – Add three more stages of Pokémon to your Lineups!
SMART COOKIE [LEVEL 1] Every time you make an attack that would generate a self-damaging result (not very effective/no effect), you have a 33% chance of stopping yourself!
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>
BATTLE STATUS: COMBAT ELIGIBLE!

[Neo Emolga]

Eh heh, well, that was painful… >.<

In the interest of that wonderful thing called survival that I didn’t get to enjoy in that last battle, I’m going to spend 1 EXP and 3 Coins on the Yes, I Lift Bro Level 1 Superpower and yeah, let’s use that last Coin for some Brass Balls and Prime that, also.

[Voltaire Magneton]

We appreciate the mayhem here. It’s tradition!

Checked with Voltaire on Discord and he’s drawing, so away we go!

VOLTAIRE MAGNETON draws from the deck and the result is…

#10 The Evil/Good Apple!
THE EVIL/GOOD APPLE! - Aglome Oen takes over as host of the game and you get to enjoy all his evil, snarky commentary! Bad things happen, like you take 1 HP damage if you whiff 10 times in a row and Friday Pay Day payouts are only 1 Coin because he takes half! But if this card is pulled again, it switches back to me and things return to normal! I’m a much nicer Emolga host!

…

…ohhhh boy. Looks like you-know-who’s coming out of his dungeon for a while. Boy, he’s going to be thrilled when he hears the news! Yikes.

What in the fresh heck did I unleash LMFAO

[Neo Emolga]

What in the fresh heck did I unleash LMFAO

You unleashed Aglome Oen, that's who! He's a chaotic evil Emolga doppelganger of myself (I'm more chaotic good, heavy on the "chaotic" as you know) who laughs whenever someone gets hit with something horrible or dies in the Stalkers RPG! Lately he's wanted to expand his presence into other areas like some greedy corporation of evil!

Heck, when he first appeared in the original Stalkers RPG back in 2016, he even caused someone with trypophobia to get a nasty reaction and we had to have a round table moderator discussion to get that under control and put warnings around! That's like Electric Soldier Porygon material right there!

Yeah, really swell guy. Not. Don't trust him for a second.

[AgloMe Oen]

You unleashed Aglome Oen, that's who! He's a chaotic evil Emolga doppelganger of myself (I'm more chaotic good, heavy on the "chaotic" as you know) who laughs whenever someone gets hit with something horrible or dies in the Stalkers RPG! Lately he's wanted to expand his presence into other areas like some greedy corporation of evil!

Heck, when he first appeared in the original Stalkers RPG back in 2016, he even caused someone with trypophobia to get a nasty reaction and we had to have a round table moderator discussion to get that under control and put warnings around! That's like Electric Soldier Porygon material right there!

Yeah, really swell guy. Not. Don't trust him for a second.

You do realize I’m rig̹ẖ̪t͓̙ͅ ̼he̝re and can hear everything you say about me? Well, I talk smack behind your back too, so I get that makes us even.

Ah, whatever. I love Halloween͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ. Nothing like death, fear, and handin͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅg diabetes and obḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅sity to young children!

Now then, can’t spell “s͚̰͓͍̫̪̅̃ͩ͂̈̎la̿ͯȕ̄̌ght͗̒ͦ̂̂͛ͥe̘͎̣̣̘͎ͦ̈̎̔̋ͦr” without “laughter!” Let’s see whoͩ gets to suffer on this won͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅderfully macabre day!

DERANGED MASTER RNG, eatin͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅg babies with a mḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅at hook, d̼ͯr̗̦͖̗̝̀͗ͭͥ̚aͬ́ͪͮͬ̑gs͎̝͕͍̘̙ͤ͑ͦͪ̌̃ in the bodies of…

NEO EMOLGA as Cin͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅccino and VOLTAIRE MAGNETON as Wooper to the SLAUGHTERHOUSE!
@Voltaire Magneton @Neo Emolga

NEO EMOLGA
SUPERPOWERS:
SMART COOKIE [LEVEL 2] – Every time yoͩu make an͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ attack that would generate a self-damaging result (not very effective/no effect), you have a 66% chance of stopping yourself!
YES, I LIFT, BRO [LEVEL 1] - Your Max HP for each battle is increased by 1!
ACTIVE BUFFS: BRASS BALLS PRIMED

VS

VOLTAIRE MAGNETON
SUPERPOWERS:
WHEEL MASTER [LEVEL 1] – ALWAYS have the Wheel option͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ after winning and Wheel people, including yourself, as much as you like! No Whḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅elie items needed for you!
ACTIVE BUFFS: MIGHTY SHIELD

The PSYCH̤O͖̬̦T̤͖̤I̥̭̮C ͅC͙̙O͇IN OF ̭͔T̯͇ͅR̬͉Ạ̰͚SH̰̮͕ ̲͓B̙A̪͎ͅGS ͚FI͎͚̟LLE̱̳D W̻͍IT̥Hͅ ̱̥̻B̞͓̯ODY̤̞ PART̩͖S̞ has declared NEO EMOLGA strikes first blooͩd!

---

TURN 1
NEO EMOLGA starts the murder parade with Revḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅lation Dance! He summon͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅs the four horsemen of the apocalypse!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Reflect Type! But he in͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅstead loͩses his mind and runs over an Iggybuff with a steamroller. Squishy!

TURN 2
NEO EMOLGA attacks with Veevee Volley! He plays volleyball with a severed Eevee’s head!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Cut! Well, he would have slashed his own͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ wrists if he had any!

TURN 3
NEO EMOLGA uses Icḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ Beam! He blasts a glacier with a plasma rifle to contribute toͩ the atrocities of global warming!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Low Kick! In͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅstead he misses Neo and kicks an innocent Mr Mime in the junk!

TURN 4
NEO EMOLGA uses Thunder! It has NO EFFECT…
…SMART COOKIE CHECK: (96/100) but he L̻̗̹EAR̹̪NE̖D̼̼̦ ͙̦̫BLOOD̪̗͇Y̻̭ ͇̜̻N̼̤̣OT̪̰H̗̗̝I̹NG͙̖͚ ͍̫F̙R̟O̫͎M Y͇E͍͔ST̰̟E̫̟R͎͍DḀY̦’S B͈A̦TT̻̦̰LE̝͙͖ and painfully R̠E̙̯̺ALI̹̯Z͕̮͕E͓̬͚S̫͔ HI͖S S̯͎TU̜̗̤PID̮̬IT̜Y! But his BRASS BALLS reduces the damage toͩ a REGULAR STRIKE! (1/5) Booo!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Thief! He fails because he’s been too goͩodie-two-shoes and hasn’t learned the art of STEALING!

TURN 5
NEO EMOLGA uses Pound! It deals an AGO̦̰̞̥ͅN̼̦͕I̱̗̰̼͇Z͎͕̯̭̲̻̳IN̘G ̳̝͎͔͉͉B̘͎̣̼̪̹̰Ḽ͖̱O̦̪̠͍͎̹W to VOLTAIRE MAGNETON! (1/3)
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Freeze-Dry! Hḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ stores the boͩdies in his meat locker for later con͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅsumption! Yum!

TURN 6
NEO EMOLGA uses Black Holḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ Eclipse! And he causes an entire galaxy to be swalloͩwed into the void! Nice one, Neo!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Water Sport! And he drown͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅs half the audience in the madness!

TURN 7
NEO EMOLGA uses Misty Exploͩsion! He blows up an ḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ntire city block but hey, at least there’s glitter and sparkles, right!?
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Leech Seed! But he got the wrong ones and instead bought deadly nightshade. Still makes for a great bouquet, though! Take a sn͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅiff!

TURN 8
NEO EMOLGA uses Dark Void! And he sḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅nds another galaxy into his noͩthingness hole! What a charmer!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Obstruct! He blocks all the fire ḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅scapes before committing arson͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ!

TURN 9
NEO EMOLGA uses Struggle Bug! He sadistically fries some ants with a magnifying glass!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Cottoͩn Spore! But it’s really his anthrax hḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ shares with the surviving members of the audience.

TURN 10
NEO EMOLGA uses Power Swap! He switches the live jumper cablḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅s from his first victim to the n͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅext!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Forḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅sight! But he doesn’t realize he’s too late to tell the children toͩ beware the oncoming train!

Voltaire, seriously!? I’ve seen zombies better at this “kill your opponḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅nt” thing than you! Get with it! That overly-fluffed fat chin͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅchilla is your target!
AGLOME OEN strikes VOLTAIRE MAGNETON for 1 HP DAMAGE! (2/3)
The beatings will continue until morale improves!

TURN 11
NEO EMOLGA uses Poison Powder! He distributḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅s even more anthrax to the audien͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅce! So generous!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Rapid Spin! He tosses a cute Azurill into a blender and turn͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅs it on!

TURN 12
NEO EMOLGA uses Doͩuble Hit! Well, he pulverizes a Jigglypuff to dḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ath quite well, but that wasn’t his actual opponent!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Frost Brḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ath! He summons an ice dragon to decimate an entire village!

TURN 13
NEO EMOLGA uses Coil! He tiḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅s up his victims in the cellar and kills the lights!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Stored Power! He overloͩads the reactor at the n͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅuclear power plant!

TURN 14
NEO EMOLGA uses Night Daze! He puts Everclear into the children’s fruit drinks! Weeee!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Electric Terrain! He sprays water everywhere and runs a cable intoͩ it!

TURN 15
NEO EMOLGA uses Rock Throw! He gives soͩme random kid Charmander a concussion!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON usḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅s Twineedle! He gives the wrong inmates a lethal injection!

Yeah, Neo, aboͩut that “do something effective thing” that you seḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅m to have so much trouble grasping? Here, let me show you how you’re supposed to doͩ it, you idiot!
AG̱̬̠̠̮̣L̟̳͚̲̣̺̺O͙͖̠̳̙M̲E̱͈̯̦̮̼̩ ̗̪͙̘OḘ͚͉̜N̤͈͈̪̭̻ͅ ̮str̻̞i͍k̹̩͈͉̥͍̫e̫̘̰s̪̤̫͇̥̭̲ ̩͉̪̭̹NE̫̟̹̳̹͙O ̪̩͖EM̬͈̯OLG̞A ̝̳̳f̦̖͕̯̩̲̩o̝̺̻͉̥ͅͅr͚͖̲̟͕̠̗ ̖̳̰1 HP͉̬̲̠̘͉ ͔̦͔͍DAMAG̯͉͙̖E̖͚̱̞̳̣ͅ!̜̦͚̯͕̦̤ (2/5)

TURN 16
NEO EMOLGA uses Growth! He feeds Audrey II his latḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅st victims.
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Acid Armor! But then͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅ he realizes it’s a terrible fashion statement.

TURN 17
NEO EMOLGA uses Fury Cutter! And that’s why him and his scissors are covered with bloͩod, officer!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Teeter Dance! He enjoͩys watching the childrḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅n he intoxicated fumble around and crash into each other!

TURN 18
NEO EMOLGA uses Decoͩrate! He decoratḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅s his front yard for Halloween! With real body parts!
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Sludge Bomb! It causes HIDE̲̩͈̥̗ͅO̮͙̼̞̼̤̥Ṳ̝͉͉̙S͇̰̤̰̬̲̲ ͚̟͎͖P̗̬A̠̭͍͔I̖̰N A̲̲͖̦̼͈̼N̠̺͇̹͎D͉̺̜̞̘͎ ͙̳̤̮̺̞̰AG̮͎͍̣̭O̻͖̹̩N͚̤͙̜̞͚Y̭̘ ͙t͓̼͚̦̳͉ͅo̦̤̟̱͙̹͔ N̤͖͕̤̻͙EO͙̘ͅ ̼Ẹ̫M͉̻͓̪̯̦O̮͇L̟̼̥G̝A!̼̹̙ (3/5)

TURN 19
NEO EMOLGA uses Fire Fang! Hḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ sets Dracula on fire, but that doͩesn’t help him with attacking Voltaire.
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Mega Drain! And all the crime scene evidence has disappeared!

TURN 20
NEO EMOLGA uses Seismic Toͩss! Except he ends up throwin͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅg an Oddish into space instead of Voltaire.
VOLTAIRE MAGNETON uses Needle Arm! He sticks a sevḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅red arm to a cactus!

TURN 21
NEO EMOLGA uses Swift! I͑̊̎ͨt̃ ̠̙̥͇f͎ͩịn̠͍̩͑̐̍a̲͚̙͈̜̐͛̃͑̓̈́ͅl̃ly͓̼͊ͮ ͆̃ͣ̈MU̳̇RDË̟̙̹̤́̂̓̏R̫ͫS̹͙͓̬ ̥̩̥ͯͮͥV͌̒̿̎̐͑̀O͓̜̙̘̠̍̓ͭ̑ͥLT̞̳͈͇̙̱̅ͮ͌ͧͫ̋̚ͅA̩͉̎ͤ̑͛̚ͅ ̰̝I̥͈̯̘̲͉ͩ̅ͯ̌̿ͥR̗̬̘̺E̤̪̯̮ Mͭ̊ͫ̿̅̓Aͮ̓́́ͥͬͦG̘̬̥͚̊̂̊̀N̓͆̐ͤ͐̽̇E̟ͫT̻̬̟͎̃ͪͨ͗Ŏ̍̾ͨ̏ ̰͉̳̺ͅÑ̦̙̿ ̞̤̫̙̄̐̃̍̚ͅw̦ḯ̹̮̬̤̆͛́th̉ ̹̠̮̱͚̫ͅa r̰̙̩̘aͥͪͧ͊z͈̹̲̃ͮ̽o̯̰͇r̥̞̤̪̙̗-sh̫͉͐̌ä̝̭͕̻͔͑͆̆ͣr̠̬̲̬̰͉ͪͪ̈́ͪ̓̓p ̠͓ͧͬͬͅf͑ͦ̅ḽ̺̜̘ṵ͕̥̿̇͑ff͎̫͙̮͙̙̂͂̉ͣ̚̚y͚̣̯̳̙ ͤͫ̋o͎̺̺ͪ̐̃f̻̲̳̺̰͈̣̔̓͒ͩ̎̈́ͩ ̦̫̼ͤ͐ͣs̗ẗ́͐ͪ̃a̬̰̝͉ͤ̊͊ͪr̙͈͈̬ͫͨ̀͗s̭̩͗̍!̥͍̗̝ͮ̄̇ͫ̔ ̤ (3/3)

DECK OF MANY ZINGS DROP (42/100) – No Dḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ck for you, scrub! In the world of Trick or Treat, you got TRICKED!

Neo. Neoͩ winning on Halloween. G̗̪̓̇Ạ̹̺͎́̌ͬͮAͧ̀̏̀̊H̩̬̽̎H̪̟͍̟̜̤,̮͇ ͚̖̝̰̮̦̂̈̌̿͂̚W͗̎Ô͎̰͎͕̱̰͓̑̿͐͒́ͪRS͈͒Ṫ̰̩͈̫̦͐̋ͤ̅͒ ̺ H̗̠̦̙̭̆̏ͯͤ͆AL̬̺̖̥̣̱̘̐ͧͩ̓̏͌ͤLOͭͬͮW͉̠͔͖̰̳̔ͪ̉̈́ͩͪÉ̜E̘ ̖̣̯͖̦N͚̟̼̯͌ͭͨ̀ E̼̳̫̭̥ͬ͑̒̓̎ͮͅVE̺̊R̥̮͇̯̪̄̿̂͆̆!̲͈̗̀̄̉̚ͅ That’s like even worse than the crap Covid-19 did to Hallowḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅en last year! I S͖̙WE̟AR̗̞ I̦͈’̠̤̖L͔̺̬L͈ ̲G̱̪̗E̮T͇͈ ̥YOU B̝͎A͉C̻K̖̼̗ FOR̥͓̤ THI̮S!̙͇̬ Voltaire, I was betting money on you, too! I would have cheated if this wasn’t being livestreamed! Stupid livestream.

Ugh, fine. Neo, you get yoͩur LOUSY 1 EXP and you gḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅t to decide…

• Devolve an͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅd egg Voltaire. But I get to eat the omelet.
• Devolve and kill yoͩurself for Evolution Crystals! Yeah, good idea!
• Or Wheel yourself. Yeah, go ahead and do that!

I’ll just havḛ̬̫̭̍͒́̅ to steal all your can͖̱͉̬͙̠̯̮̳͉̠ͩͫͨͫͤͫͨͣ̉ͤ͋̂ͅdy as revenge.

[Neo Emolga]

Man, leave it to Aglome Oen to make you feel like smut even after winning…

As fun as Wheeling Voltaire would have been, that Mighty Shield says no, so I’m going to have to go with a devolve and egg on this one. Gotta save that self-Wheel if and when I end up as something awful.

[AgloMe Oen]

Hi there. Iͦͧͬt͉̭͎̋ͤ̏’s̅̔̔ͣͧ̑ ͉̳̱̘̀̃ͮ̋a̙̮͖͖̹nar̟̬͔͎̦͔̮c̯̗͎hy ̪͈̥͍̰̦̳c̼̩̠͖̞̀̎̽̂̈́a̎ͬlḽ͖͇͔̌͒ͭ͛i̳͉ng!̝͉̜͂̍ͫ

DEMONIC MASTER RNG, setting ē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀verything on firē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀…

NOBLEJANOBII as Shinx and SLICKSLACK as Palpito͈̦̟͕̣͍͚ad to the SLAUGHTERHOUSE!
@Noblejanobii @SlickSlack

NOBLEJANOBII
SUPERPOWERS:
COMPENSATOR [LEVEL 1] – Add thrē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀e more stages of Pokémon̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ to your Lineups!
RAGE MODE [LEVEL 1] (CURRENT STREAK: 0) - After a losing streak of 2, you get +2 HP for all future battles and you attack twice for the first 5 turns. When you win, the buffs are removed until you hit a loss streak of 2 or more again.
ACTIVE BUFFS: <None>

VS

SLICKSLACK
WHEEL MASTER [LEVEL 1] – ALWAYS have the Wheel option after winning and Wheel people, including yourself, as much as you likē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀! No Wheelie items needed for you!
ACTIVE BUFFS: MIGHTY SHIELD

The MACABRE COIN OF D̰ͭẢR̗̗̙̗ͥ͛ͮͬK̹͕̖̦̩̞̍̎ͣ̽̽̂ ̼̗̻̫̤͗͊͐͒ͫH̫̙̬̦̼̲ͮͯ̽̓̎́O̔͐͆̽̿͑LO͙̦̠̠̱͖̬̓́ͫͫͥ͊ͩC̻̠ͅ ̻A̙̖̱̱̝Û̀ͫ̍S̜̠̾̅T͇S͙͕͖̝͔̙̜͊ͥ̄͊̆̓͑ has declared SLICKSLACK strikes first blooͩd!

---

TURN 1
SLICKSLACK begins the slaughter with Bitē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀! She takes a big chomp of out a jugular vein̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Cross Cho͈̦̟͕̣͍͚p! And now there’s a Squirtle in four separate pieces!

TURN 2
SLICKSLACK uses G-Max Vinē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ Lash! She whips her slaves into o͈̦̟͕̣͍͚bedience!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Baddy Bad! Nah, she’d rather n̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ot do something with a stupid name like that!

TURN 3
SLICKSLACK uses Darkest Lariat! But she prefers things with blades and knives.
NOBLEJANOBII usē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s Razor Shell! But she misses and tosses it into the crowd!

TURN 4
SLICKSLACK uses Stored Power! She overloads the reactor at the n̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽uclear power plant!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Bolt Strike! Except she zaps a Pidgey to a crisp instead!

TURN 5
SLICKSLACK uses Dragon Hammē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀r! Except Smaug tells her to͈̦̟͕̣͍͚ piss off and buy her own.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Stomp! She turns a Caterpie into a puddle of goo!

TURN 6
SLICKSLACK uses Ice Burn! She melts a glacier, doing her part for accelerating climate change!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Ingrain! She stitches the bo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚dies of her victims to the ground!

TURN 7
SLICKSLACK uses Submission! She forces her slaves to hear and o͈̦̟͕̣͍͚bey her dark command!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Camouflage! And n̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ow the authoritiē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s will never find the bodies!

TURN 8
SLICKSLACK uses Block! She seals off the exits before making the mine collapse!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Covet! Shē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ uses a bloodletter to satisfy her thirst for that sweet, sweet blood!

TURN 9
SLICKSLACK uses Baton Pass! But she instead hands the next runner a stick o͈̦̟͕̣͍͚f dynamite!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Mach Punch! But she instead beheads a Mime Jr with a flamin̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽g fist!

TURN 10
SLICKSLACK uses Frost Breath! But she only vomits all over her next victim.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Multi-Attack! She strikes multiple audience members at the same time!

Ladies, we’re n̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ot getting any younger here and we’d all likē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ to get this done before our eyes sink into the back of our skulls. Wake up and get with the program!
AGLOME OEN strikes both SLICKSLACK and NOBLEJANOBII for 1HP DAMAGE! SLICKSLACK (1/3) NOBLEJANOBII (1/3)
Now do somethin̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽g!

TURN 11
SLICKSLACK uses Bone Club! But shē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ prefers using the skeletal remains o͈̦̟͕̣͍͚f her victims for stabbing weapons.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Grudge! But she’d rather pursue an̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ actual murder instead.

TURN 12
SLICKSLACK uses Heat Crash! She drops a furnace from the roof down to the people below!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Tailwind! But she overdoes it and causes a plane to crash!

TURN 13
SLICKSLACK uses Leech Life! But she bites an inn̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ocent Pichu and realizes her fangs haven’t fully developed yet.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Strength Sap! But she gets it wrong and only causē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s everyone at the hospital to become anemic.

TURN 14
SLICKSLACK uses Taunt! She laughs and throws in̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽sults at her victims! Before cutting them up, of course.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Retaliate! She gets back at the bullies she used to know in grammar school! And now they’ll all have to have closed casket funerals.

TURN 15
SLICKSLACK usē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s Razor Wind! But it’s actually a rapidly spinning propeller that she sends flyin̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽g into the crowd.
NOBLEJANOBII uses G-Max Snooze! Except she cranks it a bit to͈̦̟͕̣͍͚o high and makes that Snorlax sleep a bit more permanently. Whoops!

TURN 16
SLICKSLACK uses Minimizē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀! But she finds out the hard way trying to squeeze a Rattata through a vent just makes him go squish in a warm and gooey way.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Scale Shot! She opens fire on someon̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽e who was just trying to see how much they weigh!

TURN 17
SLICKSLACK uses Wonder Room! She locks a bunch of kids up and sprays hallucinogenic gas into the room!
NOBLEJANOBII uses False Surren̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽der! Except they see right through it and shē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ had to end up killing everyone instead.

TURN 18
SLICKSLACK uses Jump Kick! Except she misses Noble and now a mo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚ther Furret has to explain to her husband why her kid is missing a head.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Morning Sun! And n̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ow all the nocturnal Pokémon despise her.

TURN 19
SLICKSLACK uses Thunder Fang! Except runn̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ing voltage through Dracula only really pisses him off.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Clanging Scales! She keeps the whole nē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ighborhood up at night screaming for her demise!

TURN 20
SLICKSLACK uses Baddy Bad! Except she rather be completely rotten and evil instead.
NOBLEJANOBII usē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s Ominous Wind! But they’re no͈̦̟͕̣͍͚t paying her en̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ough to haunt a house.

…
Ladies, seriously, at least try murdering each other sometime today. This has got to be embarrassing for both of you!
AGLOME OEN strikē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀s both SLICKSLACK and NOBLEJANOBII for 1HP DAMAGE! SLICKSLACK (2/3) NOBLEJANOBII (2/3)
We wann̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽a see blood!

TURN 21
SLICKSLACK uses Malicious Moonsault! Except she misses and blows up a planet instead.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Branch Poke! But she jabs a Yun̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽goos too hard and impales him in the eye.

TURN 22
SLICKSLACK uses Continental Crush! But blowing up an entire continent isn’t quite as much fun as destroying entire planets.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Powder Snow! But it’s rē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ally anthrax she spreads aro͈̦̟͕̣͍͚und everywhere!

TURN 23
SLICKSLACK uses Flatter! Except she gets it mixed up with “fatter” like a nimrod and feeds a stuffed Snorlax a wafer-thin mint.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Jump Kick! And an̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽other kid loses their head!

TURN 24
SLICKSLACK uses Reflect Type! She breaks a mirror by accident but decides to make good use of the shards in her torture chamber.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Men̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽acing Moo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚nraze Maelstrom! But she wants hē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀r apocalypse to involve fire instead.

TURN 25
SLICKSLACK uses Simple Beam! Except here the caveman can do it and she can’t! Ha!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Drill Peck! But she thinks it involves welding a dagger to her face.

TURN 26
SLICKSLACK uses Fake Tears! But when people sē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀e right through it, she makes them cry REAL tears!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Magic Powder! And she causes some kids to get addicted to drugs!

TURN 27
SLICKSLACK uses Splash! She jumps around in the kiddie pool she filled with blo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚od!
NOBLEJANOBII uses Leaf Tornado! Except it escalates in̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽to a real tornado and devastates the countryside!

TURN 28
SLICKSLACK uses Petal Dance! But she finds that Lilligant she ripped the flowē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀r off of would rather kill her now than do͈̦̟͕̣͍͚ the tango.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Never-Ending Nightmare! But she needs to do a lot more damage to her align̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽ment before using that!

TURN 29
SLICKSLACK uses Thrash! She beats a Sentret into a bloody pulp!
NOBLEJANOBII uses G-Max Tartness! But that in̙̥͎̜̼̩̱̬͂̈ͦͯ̄̄ͣ̽stead causes evē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ryone to get monstrous obesity.

TURN 30
SLICKSLACK uses Court Change! But to her, that involves burning it all down instead.
NOBLEJANOBII uses Dark Pulse! But shē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ finds out the darkness is more dead than living.

…30 TURNS AND NOTHING!?
S̤̜̰̠ͮ͒̉̏͆ͅWÉ̿̒ͬͫ̇ͮ̿ͥͮ̽̎ͪͫE̘͙̺̠̞̘̩̾̄́̌ͫ͗̈́ͪ̆ͬ̎ͩͫ̓ͅ ͚̘̹̥̰̻T͍͚̆͆̊ͅ ̃̎̎ͬ̀͗͛̂͐̋ͩ̋͗ͨM͈̪̭̞̟̙Ȏ̋ͣ̉̌̎ͧͤͮ̈́̐Ț̗H̦͉͆̓̿ͥ̔ͥ̐̒̉̚ͅ ̼̯͖̮͈̼ͅER ̩̭̺̞̟̮͕͖̱͇͔͐̒͋ͩ̒ͪ̔͊ͩ͑̚O͇̙͎̼̰̻͖̱͓̺͔͙͒ͨ̓͒͌͗̿̍ͪ̈́̔͌͐̎̚ ͍̝ͅF̹̝̫͙̜́́ͪ͗ͪ ̥̪̗̥͎͎̞G͉̼͙̱̞͍̙̥̝͈͖̝̜̮̩I̭͇̲͔̲̬̫͍̩ͪ̂̃̒ͬ̈́̑͊͒RAͯͤ̐ͮ̅ͣ ̯̖̺̹̝̟̪̘̹̱͚͚̱̪̦ͭ̑̓͆͐̋̓̀͌TI̒̃͒̍͊̆́͗̈ͩͥ̑N̰̘͎̻̲ͣ͒̿̔̓̎ ̻A̮͖̲ͦ̊ͤ, this is just SAD. If I had it my way, you’d bo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚th die, but ugh, I suppose I have to let one of you win and live. So let’s flip a coin! Heads and Noble dies and Tails, Slick fries. So with a little flip…
TAILS! Sorry, no͈̦̟͕̣͍͚t sorry, Slick! Enjoy a n̰̳͔̳̖͍̥̎̾̾͐̈͒́̓ͅice dirt nap, try hitting something next time and maybe this won’t happen̰̳͔̳̖͍̥̎̾̾͐̈͒́̓ͅ!!

DECK OF MANY ZINGS DROP (5/100) – THE DECK HAS APPEARED!!!

Ugh, that was just h̩̰̳͇̣̲̟͚o͗͑̍̽̀̐̔̾ͧͩ͂͊ͨ͒r̃̊̾̽́͒̏̉͌̽͒͂ͥr͗̍͂͌ͫ̊̅ͪͦí ̗̮̗͎̟ͪ͆̈͒b͔͎̻̥̝̫ͩ̋͌̔̊̒l̯̤̬̣͔͇̖̗͙͙ͅe̟͉ͮ̎. Take your 1 EXP that yo͈̦̟͕̣͍͚u didn’t actually ē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀arn and…

• Devolve Slick into a pathetic Tympole.
• Devolve and kill yoͩurself for an Evolution Crystal! Nothing wronͨ̃̋͑ͭͮg with that!
• Evolve yoursē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀lf to Luxio and stop being a pansy Shinͨ̃̋͑ͭͮx.
• Or Wheel yourself. Because you’re p̱̳̙̘s̗̰̺̠ͥ̿̃͆y̲̱̘̟͎̘c̫̜̜̖̋͒̂̆hö̻̬̺́̏̆ti̘̼̹̣͐ͫ̌̎cͪ ͍̩̞̩ͧ̌͛.

And…

Do you try your luck with the Dē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ck or do you to͈̦̟͕̣͍͚ss it in Slick’s zombie facē̥͈̱̤̒͛̀ to deal with!?

Go oń̦, d̏̏ͬ͌ͥ͐ȅͣ̎̃c͍̥̩̬ͧ͊̃͆i͍̻̠͙̣̎͑̇̄ͪde̠̦̮ a̩͚̫ͭ̅̊l̟r͕͊ë͓͙̳̘̮ͣ̆̆̂ͬͅă̠̞̮̮̘ͤ̐̌̔d̗̪̣͇̲̻̈́̆ͬ̉̓ͯy ̰!̰̩̳̠ͦͪ̃́