So, as I wait for Windows Movie Maker to figure out what it's doing, by twiddling it's non-existent cyber-thumbs and taking over an hour to write a twenty minute video file, here I sit re-editing an old (and when I mean old, I mean OLD) story I started writing for fun... little did I know at the time, that this story would take about 4 YEARS to write... writer's block is a cruel mistress. The biggest hurdle in finishing this story was the fact that it seemed impossible to get it to become funnier than it was. Either way, here's the first of 4 chapters in my epic mini-saga; originally posted on a few different sites, back in March of 2006.
Here's a random game for all you readers. Can you figure out what the elevator that Misty and Pikachu ride is from? It's a little obscure, but if you've experienced it, you know what it's a take on. Fun ride, all in all.
Minor Note: I didn't do the drawing of the two Pikachus... I don't remember exactly where I found the pic, but I nabbed it off a Google search back in 2006 as well. Hurray for original title art.
Chapter 1: The Great Fall
"NoOoOoO!" Ash yelled, watching his beloved Pikachu fall off the cliff face.
Though screaming "Pika" all the way down the cliff, the breeze felt nice as it ran across his puny yellow (xxxx). It had been such a hot day. Having a steady cool breeze was the best way to die on the type of day that it had been.
All the world went black around the world famous Pikachu and the little yellow rat thought he saw a vision of Ash with Misty crying over the remains of yellow fur. All the people at the reception were wearing black and Pikachu somehow knew that he was witnessing his own funeral.
"Pika…" he said in relative shock. "Pika, pika, pikachu-," deep words that we all can agree to.
Visions clouded the little yellow rat's mind and he found himself where all the good Pokemon end up in the afterlife. Charmanders, Tamagochi Monsters, and Alf ran happily in the distance; to his side, Pikachu couldn't believe his eyes when he thought he saw a Seviper playing Ice Curling with a Mightyena.
It really was Heaven…
Gracefully gallivanting, Pikachu found himself in front of a desk made out of clouds; but the Dragonite receptionist quickly reassured the little yellow rat that it wasn't clouds at all, but Swablu and Altaria hides.
Smiling, the Pikachu asked where he should go in Pika-Heaven. The Dragonite smiled back and shuffled through it's papers on it's desk. A worried look went across the Dragonite's face and he looked at Pikachu seriously for a brief moment.
"Pika?"
The Dragonite shook it's head and said, "I'm sorry Pikachu, but you're not on the list." The Dragonite smiled briskly and continued, "Have a nice day!"
"PIKA!" (translation: But why? I'm the world famous Pikachu! I have to be on the list! I'm the Pikachu that's with Ash, "chosen" trainer of most legends! I follow Ash, Brock, Misty, May, and her annoying brat brother on all their Poke-Journeys! I HAVE TO BE ON THE LIST YOU FAT, ORANGE, PIECE OF-)
But before Pikachu could finish his rant against the Dragonite, Pikachu began falling quickly to the dark abyss below the clouds of Pika Heaven.
As he fell, the air seemed to become colder, as if the life was being sucked dry from his conceptual world. The nice coastal wind from the cliff breeze could have been remembered as an oven compared to the bleak world that Pikachu felt that he was falling into.
Though oddly, the dismal cold of Hell also burned with fires that ripped away at his very soul. The oncoming feeling of what pains to come couldn't fully be conceptualized in the tiny little yellow rat's mind, and he wished he was back in the safety of Ash's arms once more.
The darkness became darker; shadows, palpable. To the point Pikachu couldn't see his own paws in front of his face. He tried sparking lights from his electric cheeks, but the energy he struggle to creat was being sucked from every part of his body. So that no matter how hard he tried to create light in the darkness, he failed.
His falling suddenly stopped, when what seemed to be a break from the laws of physics, he began to fall the opposite direction. Falling up as one may call it, he hit the ceiling with a bone crushing crash. Of course, being dead and in Pika Hell, he couldn't die; but only feel the extreme burning pain that caused him to cry for the mercy that wouldn't come.
Pikachu was in Hell. And he was too scared to open his eyes.
This all had to be a nightmare of the worst kind. But Pikachu soon realized he was in the reality of his afterlife.
Pikachu kept his eyes shut tightly, then a familiar voice said calmly and almost motherly, "Pikachu. I'm surprised you didn't make it to Pika Heaven. But oh well, sometimes I get a surprise every so often."
Pikachu kept his eyes shut. His body was in intense pain, as if the inferno of a volcano boiled his fur to a singe.
"Oh, c'mon Pikachu," the voice said. "Open your eyes, and accept the outcome of your life."
As if being prodded open with toothpicks, Pikachu's eyelids widened to reveal his new master. Surprisingly it was-…
"Hey Pikachu! My real name's Charon! The Gatekeeper of Hell. I sometimes go into the physical world under the alias of Misty, but that's trivial information nobody really cares about."
"Pika…" he said in relative shock. "Pika, pika, pikachu-," deep words that we all can agree to.
"No, Pikachu. Up on the physical world you may know me as, Misty, the Water Gym Leader. But down here, my name's Charon, the Gatekee-"
"Pika, Pikachu," Pikachu interrupted.
"Yeah, Gatekeeper of Hell," the character formally known as Misty finished. "You're catching on," she said with a… friendly smile…
Pikachu sighed as he got to his feet.
"Well," Charon (Misty) said brisky, "I'll take you to your level of Hell. I'm surprised you're assigned to such a low level! Not even the majority of lawyers and politicians go that low." She finished her sentence with a chipper laugh. In normal situations, that signature laugh would seem girlie. But down here… she seemed to come off as cynical…
Charon (Misty) led Pikachu to what looked like a large elevator. In the elevator were a bunch of seats set up in a movie theatre fashion. Each seat had it's own special seat belt. Sitting in on of the seats, Charon (Misty) strapped herself in. Telling Pikachu to do the same, Pikachu sat himself next to his old friend with many secrets he didn't know about until now.
As the elevator went up, Pikachu became confused. Looking to the Gatekeeper for some insight on the situation, Pikachu noticed that she only sat in her seat with a fixed grin, drumming her lap in anticipation.
A voice began speaking as if through an intercom… "In the world that we know," it said lowly. "There are many things we take for granted. Things in this world that would seem as normal, as one may say. But in the world of the darkness, things begin to change…"
Whispering quietly, Charon said into Pikachu's ear with controlled excitement, "I love this part. No matter how much I go on this elevator, I never expect it."
The voice in the intercom explained the strange supernatural world that society could never in their live's existence fully understand. The elevator doors opened and showed a hallway to some sort of haunted mansion with ghosts running this way and that. A candlestick in the distance danced alone, being held by the restless spirits that lived in the walls of the Elevator.
The elevator rose once more to a huge hole in the wall. The sun shone into the elevator, and Pikachu could see what looked like an "amusement" park below filled with tourists with balloons. He had to have been hundreds of feet high in the air! It was an amazing sight. Looking over to Charon with a smile, he heard her quietly awe in the view.
Then out of nowhere the elevator dropped quickly! Charon screamed in delight and Pikachu found himself scared out of the pants he didn't have! The elevator bounced back up even higher than before. Pikachu felt a small moment of weightlessness as the elevator reached it's peak. Then the elevator dropped again! But even faster! Holding his paws to his eyes, he felt as if his world was losing all control! Whatever held the space-time of the universe had already been obliterated, and what swirled in the little yellow rat's head was pure chaos.
Then everything became quiet…
The elevator doors dinged daintily, and Pikachu found himself being un-buckled from his seat by Charon.
"Did you like the elevator?" she asked happily.
"Polka!" Clearing his throat, he said once more, "Pika…"
"Okay, whatever," she said, waving a hand in the air and turning away from Pikachu gently. "You're just grumpy because you died and went to Hell. I see how it is."
Pikachu sat there more confused than ever as Charon walked away. She suddenly turned around happily and asked Pikachu, "You wanna' see the Gift Shop?"
Pikachu sighed, and agreed. Following the girlishly-cute Gatekeeper of Hell around a red rocky corner. He found himself walking straight into a small shop filled with t-shirts, mugs, toys, board games, galore. Looking around, he asked Charon if he could buy an Ash Bobble Head.
Lightheartedly, Charon nodded.
Once out of the Gift Shop, Pikachu followed Charon down a long hallway lined with jagged hot rocks of lava, ice cold shards that seemed as sharp as razors, and framed pictures of the cast from "Happy Days." It was horrible.
Coming to a door with the numbers "42" on it. Pikachu noticed that the door could of unknowingly replaced the door to a Holiday Inn without any suspicion.
"Well here's your room!" Charon said. She pulled out a small card key and unlocked the door. With a 'click,' the light maple door swung open revealing a room with two beds, a telephone, a microwave, TV, mini-fridge, and bathroom. There was also free towels, a mini-coffee maker set up in the bathroom, and cute little complimentary soap bars and packs. "Enjoy your stay," she continued. "If you need to go anywhere; just call housekeeping on the phone. Your roommate should be arriving pretty soon."
Walking into the room, Charon locked the door behind the little yellow rat.
For some reason, Pikachu didn't feel very welcome to his new home.
Jumping on to one of the soft beds, Pikachu was more tired than he had ever been in his whole life.
He felt like Hell.
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