Farts

[Corey]

THIS THREAD OMG.

I exclusively fart when I'm alone/around my pets, or, everyone once in an unfortunate while, by accident in public. I can realistically say I've only ever farted in public at most 50 times from the time I was old enough to control it. I don't let 'em rip when I'm with friends/family, not even my parents (who are not as shy about their "booty burps" as I, unfortunately for myself and passersby).

My dogs are also the silent but deadly pooters, and tend to release right before we fall asleep. Also, dog years aren't seven years to one human year, but instead it's a complicated formula. Ten and a half dog years per human year for the first two years, and four dog years per human year every subsequent year. So Janobii, your doggie is actually about 57 in human years (which is almost as old as Sarah!!). My dogs are fairly young, with the oldest being five and a quarter years old, but you'd think they'd be older judging by their farts. :v

[[Desolate Divine]]

Flat out honest.

I will let them rip wherever, as long as I think I can get away with it. Mine mostly don't smell unless I have been eating differently (eg I hardly ever eat fruit, but if I go a few days having a banana with breakfast... God help us all...). So no biggie. If I feel like it will:
A) Stink
B) Make a noise
C) Follow through

I won't do it. But if it is silent, odourless, and safe, I won't care too much. And everyone else will be none the wiser.

Though the other night, I was at a friends house waiting for the right time to let one rip, where I would get away with it. I was playing a game, and someone went to pass me something. I leaned over and it slipped. Loudly. I think people were talking when I did it. I hope they were...

Funny story, a couple of years back I was at church and felt the pew rumble. I looked to my right and saw my skater mate who loves anything gross, has long dreadlocks etc, looking at me grinning...

[Noblejanobii]

XD Oh my gosh that's hilarious about that guy. Gross, but hilarious.

[Suicune's Fire]

I love everyone's responses to this. xD And Corey, how you know that there's a complicated formula.