King of the Hill!

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I beat you in Rock Paper Scissors for the hill, and reclaim it.

MY HILL!!!

[The-Hydra]

I can't argue with that. But fortunately in an error in my favor, The hill is mine.

My hill.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I summon the legendary Pulchritude wielder that is PROBLEM SLEUTH. I proceed to have PROBLEM SLEUTH use LV.99 SLEUTH DIPLOMACY on you. While you're being introduced to PROBLEM SLEUTH's kind of diplomacy (read: a can of whoopa**), I reclaim the hill.

MY HILL!!!

[The-Hydra]

I say, "Look pal, You DON'T want this hill." You say, "I DO want it!" I say, "You DON'T want it!" That goes on until I cleverly say, "You DO want it!" Causing you to say, "I DON'T want it!" Then the hill transforms magically from yours to mine.

My hill.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I repat your trick, causing you to fall for it again and give me back the hill unintentionally.

Then I kick you in the shins to get you the heck away from the hill itself, because why not.

MY HILL!!!

[The-Hydra]

I wait until you die of old age an take the hill.

My hill, After all these years.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

As whoever has the hill is immortal/eternally young/something along those lines (a reason why we are even bothering with this hill), you turn into an old man while I keep myself in check, so you're now an old man and I'm still fit as a fiddle. You facepalm once you realize I'm not aging for some ridiculous reason, and resolve to reclaim the hill (and you youth) in some different matter that doesn't involve waiting.

The hill is still mine, so...

MY HILL!!!

[The-Hydra]

I'm really angry that I was so stupid, So I'm just filled with enough rage to topple you from your hill.

My hill.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

Your RAGE makes a Gyarados jealous, and said Gyarados eats you in an attempt to obtain your RAGE. While you're trapped in the Gyarados'es stomach, I reclaim the hill.

MY HILL!!!

[The-Hydra]

I make friends with the Gyarados, And we combine our rage to topple you once more.

Our hill.