King of the Hill!

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I break your Lucario's Arms. It can no longer punch. You flee in terror at my ability to break bones made of STEEL, and I claim the hill.

MY HILL!!!

[MichaelXD]

Lucario's arms are healed at a Pokémon center. Then it does the same thing again, and then I claim the hill again.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I'm a ghost type, so you coudln't have done it anyways. I rip your soul out of your body, throw your soul north and claim the hill while you go 'fetch' it for all of eternity.

MY HILL!!!!

[MichaelXD]

Houndoom uses Odor Sleuth. Now it can attack with Power Up Punch, so I claim the hill and run it.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

Yvetal abducts both you and your Pokemon and drops you off in the middle of the pacific ocean. You're clearly nowhere near the hill now, so...

MY HILL!!!

[VeloJello]

I ride in proudly on my velociraptor army, mosh-pit style. It carries you off of the hill and drops you off at the nearest ice cream shop. Now that you're distracted by delicious dairy treats, I claim the hill. The hill is now mine.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

I throw the Ice Cream Shop at your Velociraptor Army, and find out that the Velociraptors are made of Plasticine. With nobody to back you up, you flee from my Ice Cream Shop-tossing powers and I claim the hill.

MY HILL!!!

[VeloJello]

Magnetized to the ice cream that fills the ice cream shop that is now located on the hill, I return and challenge you to an ice cream contest. Unfortunately, you fall to my ability to down triple-scoop cones of cookies-n-cream. The hill is now mine.

[The Nonexistent Tazz]

...Only to be attacked by the Vanilluxe that had also gathered en masse to the Ice Cream Shop. I kick it to the horizon, as well as you. You're distraced by dairy treats, Frozen by Vanilluxe, and I have my hill.

MY HILL!!!

[VeloJello]

Fortunately for me, I am quickly thawn out by my loyal Arcanine, Sir Percival Valiance Lancelot VI. I hop onto his back and charge up to reclaim my hill. He Roars you away, and we picnic together atop the hill. The hill is now mine.