You feast upon the party, only to swell to hilariously abnormal sizes! As it turns out, my legion of dedicated poisoners had injected eight tons of concentrated liquid fat directly into all of your food, causing you to swell to the size of balloons! The poisoners, completely unopposed (and coming equipped with anti-magic barriers to negate Dude the Moon Dragon as well as electric attacks), laugh as they roll all of you down the hill into oversized bowling balls, which roll into oversized bowling pins. You are then carted away by health advocates who insist on you burning all of those carbs before you try anything, while I use the power of my soul to burn away the idea of Dude the Moon Dragon owning Polymorphing spells, untransforming me and the Pirate-Samurai Legions. From there, I just order the hill to be shipped to Bahama.

Lacking opposition, I reclaim the hill and enjoy the glory that is the hill.

MY HILL!