The Squawkers RPG - The Main Action and Team Status Thread of Candy Madness! [NOW LIVE AND INSANE!]

[Bulbasaur]

Search (9a) Yesterdayland: A Historical Adventure.

And (9c) Post-Apocalypseland.

[Shruikan]

For my first action I'll do some working out, for the very likely senario that I fall into another trap.
Then for my second, I'll go talk to 57 Mooker the Slowbro.

[Neo Emolga]

First I'll workout and then search
(31) Slippy Bleeps National Central City State Memorial Municipal Park (CANDY) - (31) Center area paths and tree stuff!

DOOOOOM! DOOOOOOOO- oh, I mean... sure.

FIRST ACTION!

Those Squawkers! You let the hate flow through you. You feel its dark tendrils wrapping around your soul, and you let loose an unholy shriek of pain and suffering that rushes across the land and begins the harvesting of souls and bodies! Nothing stands in the way of your doom campaign and your unending onslaught of... just kidding, you run crazy miles on that treadmill, bust a move on that stairmaster until it breaks, and then do a thousand bench presses... with your tongue! Boy, was that fun or what!?

Carly has ruined reality and has dropped 2 Belly points and 2 Overwhelming Cuteness points!

Mmmm, you feel better! Ready to go rockin' and rollin'!

---

SECOND ACTION!

It's a lovely, romantic night! Why not utterly ruin it by checking out Slippy Bleeps!? Just kidding, it's not that bad. Maybe. Well, your guess is as good as mine! Just kidding again, my guess is ALWAYS better! Nah ha ha!

You stalk through the night and you arrive at Slippy Bleeps National Central City State Memorial Municipal Park, where everything is lovely and smothered with fuzzy, tasty cotton CANDY! Hey, why not try a bite?

@Krazy Cotton Candy Jamboree - FLYING (+1 Belly)@

Carly has gained 1 Belly Point!

Mmm, ifs suu fwauffy ahn sawft! You munch on that stuff and thankfully, it's not too filling. Be happy it's Cotton Candy Jamboree and not Rocky Road Ice Cream Slathered On Oreo Cheesecake Jamboree!

You search around through the night, checking every fluffy tree, fluffy bush, yellow brick road, People magazine, the insides of your shoes, and the inside of every toilet paper roll. At first, it doesn't seem like much is here, besides fluffy, fluffy cotton candy everywhere! Yeah, there's plenty of that, but eventually, you find the outright WEIRDEST thing. It looks like some really huge, enigmatic labyrinth vault of secrets and mysteries! And wow, what a security system! Doesn't look like it's going to open with a simple knock! Noooo, you need not one, not two, but three strange codes! And if that's not enough, there's a hookup for a power cell and then a codex unit! Wow, you REALLY wonder what the deal with this is!

{Crypto Cache Secured Vault: Decrypted Code #1 AND Decrypted Code #2 AND Decrypted Code #3 AND Supercharger Giga Power Cell AND Enigmatic Power Codex Unit}

Weird stuff! You really wonder what's behind that vault door, but... geez, hate to say it, but even asking pretty please with sugar on top is a request that I'll have to DENY. You can't bribe me! No... nope, no-no-no.

You decide to head back to Peep Base! Before all the good beds are taken!

Carly the Courageous Growlithe (M: Fire)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4.5/10
Overwhelming Cuteness: 2/10
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Memes

[Neo Emolga]

Hude works at the hotel, eh? Unfortunate that it's been turned into candy, but I can handle a bit of that. I'll spend the next while trying to make my way around it.

Search (12) Shut Up And Sleep Hotel Exterior.

Annnd... as much as I want to take the risk and search the floors, I'm going to make a command decision. We don't exactly have much better to spend our Snax on, aye?

Buy $[Destiny Ritual Instructions] 400 Snax$ at (25) Medieval Crimes Dinner and Tournament.

FIRST ACTION!

Awww, that poor Shut Up and Sleep Hotel! Insurance doesn't cover this and you imagine the property value has dropped like a rock! Those darn Squawkers! All ruining the economy and junk like that. It's so wrong!

You fly over to the pudding disaster and wow, what a mess. What used to be a nice hotel is not just a giant vanilla pudding heap. A creamy vanilla pudding heap.

@Creamy Vanilla Pudding Deliciousness! - NORMAL (+2 Belly)@

So creamy you take a little lick and... mmmmm.....

Velo has gained 2 points of Belly from the Creamy Vanilla Pudding Deliciousness!

Oh, that hits the spot! Actually, you eat enough that it hits several spots.

You search around the outside, wondering if there's anything fun or crazy lurking in the mess. Well, just about every car has turned into cake and has sunken into the parking lot while most of the hotel rooms have collapsed in on each other. Ordinarily, it would seem tragic if it wasn't so tasty! Always look on the sunny side of things, right!? But that's tough to do at night.

You find another one of those funky fidget spinner pads! Oh, you remember this from the beach! And guess what!?

#Rainbow Glitter - GROUND (+2 Overwhelming Cuteness)# Trap 15% Evasion Test: XX out of 100: DENIED!

Oh, oh, you REALLY feel inclined to head back to the beach and put even more enhancements to your taunt monument, but instead, nah, you make another one here instead!

#[Fidget Spinner Pad] Rainbow Glitter - GROUND (+2 Overwhelming Cuteness)# has been added to the Team Pile!

Ha ha, ha ha ha! HA HA HA! You swear you could die laughing about all this, but you decide not to. Wise move! Well, you plunder around the rest of the place, but you don't find any more goodies. Just more vanilla pudding. Yeah, you don't need to take that home with you. You don't need to share it with your friends. They can always come here and enjoy it all on their own!

---

SECOND ACTION!

You want to go shopping. Totally. You were one [Destiny Ritual Instructions] away from having the perfect Christmas and that DARN SANTA totally forgot! That dummy. And yet he has his elves making [Destiny Ritual Instructions] in the workshop all the time! Psh. Looks like you'll need to undertake the adventurous and perilous journey that every disappointed Christmas participant has to undergo. Buying it yourself!

You head over to Medieval Crimes Dinner and Tournament and stomp your way right to their gift shop the way you know a Lugia can. You nearly kick a baby Cleffa like a slapped hockey puck and knock over a store shelf like a linebacker. The underpaid Squirtle store clerk trembles, thinking you're going to rob the place like a cunning, evil rogue, but no, you slap down that $400 Snax on the counter and point to the [Destiny Ritual Instructions]. SUCK IT, SANTA!

Velo has used $400 Snax to purchase the [Destiny Ritual Instructions]! Another satisfied customer!

He nods, waddles over to the display case, and pulled out the mysterious and luminous [Destiny Ritual Instructions]! Behold, they're yours now! You can make a paper origami crane with them, fly it like a kit, blow your nose with them, or... maybe... just maybe... use them for what they're supposed to be used for!

[Destiny Ritual Instructions] have been added to the Team Pile! Merry Belated Christmas!

You smile, wish the little Squirtle good night, and you head off wearing a lovely grin! Aww, even a happy Lugia is cute and cuddly too!

Velo the Heroic Lugia (L: Psychic/Flying)

Classy: Guardian Snow Angel
Style: Puns of Anarchy (Overwhelming Cuteness -3 on each Enemy Attack)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 6/12
Overwhelming Cuteness: 1/8
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Hardcore Parkour

[Neo Emolga]

Search (9a) Yesterdayland: A Historical Adventure.

And (9c) Post-Apocalypseland.

Why not!? It's one of the last remaining attractions left! Unless you count the candy ones.

FIRST ACTION!

Hilariously enough, Yesterdayland is like going through a time machine, and you find that things are even active at night! There's the funny ancient wonders attraction where you navigate a temple like you're Indiana Jones, Lara Croft, or some other bloke going treasure hunting by finding stuff that dead folks don't need anymore! Oh, and then there's the Wild West area with Pokémon wasting all their money buying cap gun supplies so they can just keep shooting each other with blanks. Oh, and don't forget the Medieval area where knights in armor and damsels in distress run amuck!

But it's a mess! Characters from one area keep crossing into others and the whole thing is disorganized and bizarre. Actually, it grows on you in a Super Smash Bros kind of way. Things don't make sense and... it's easier to appreciate it that way!

You also find a western-themed juice concession stand here, where a sleepy Piplup is just waiting and waiting for his shift to be over. But you check out the menu while you're there.

DRINK CONCESSION STAND
$[Acorn Juice - NORMAL (+1 Belly)] 300 Snax$
$[Pinky Lemonade - GRASS (+1 Belly) 200 Snax$
$[Sodah - WATER (+1 Belly)] 200 Snax$
$[Rooty Beer - WATER (+1 Belly)] 200 Snax$

You find it funny when one of the knights in armor, a Ambipom, buys a Rooty Beer and suddenly realizes he can't drink it through his steel helmet.

You also catch a magic show hosted by a Bibarel dressed like a wizard in the middle of the crossroads, only the show is kind of a disaster. The first tricks go wrong, the Bibarel treats it like it was intentional and tried to play it off like the whole thing is half a comedy show, and then the real tricks come out. He makes money disappear! And then turns the previous owner, a Gallade, into a Pikachu with some very suspicious-looking powder. And then with a puff of smoke, he's gone!

You decide that yeah, maybe it's time to move on before you have to be called into court to give a witness testimony.

---

SECOND ACTION!

Okay, you've had enough of history gone completely berserk. Really, you think just about every historian would cringe at that place. So you move onto... Post-Apocalypseland! Fallen cities, wasteland landscapes, lots of busted car shells, and other junk makes it feel like you've stepped into some crazy Pokémon version of Fallout or Mad Max. And you find it odd how there's so many fun attractions in what would kind of be a depressing setting. But hey, there's fun junkyard racing, bandit hunting, a zombie survival escape room thingy, and some crazy scenario where you need to perform a heist to steal gas and shoot stuff and other fun, violent things! Actually, you find this to be way more fun than Yesterdayland, but my goodness, you're quite sure it wouldn't be a good influence on children!

There's even a "Roadkill Shack" restaurant, which looks beat-up and grungy, and has a Raticate taking offense to the fact one of the items on the menu is a "Raticate Steak" and she thinks screaming at the underpaid teenager Scrafty cashier is going to do anything. Meanwhile, the rest of the menu has things like "Grilled Pachirisu on a Stick" which you kind of hope isn't actually a Pachirisu. Nah, it's only chicken! Wait, Pokémon raising actual chickens...? ...just play along with it.

You also find a fun wasteland maze, which you only have ten minutes to complete or you're considered dead and don't get the wasteland candy they're handing out at the end. You imagine the incentive doesn't hold too much value considering in Booplesnoot, it's not hard at all to run into candy and desserts.

While searching around in the maze, you find a really fascinating book propped up against one of the tin sheet walls. As you look it over, you have a funny feeling this is definitely not meant to be part of the post-apocalyptic festivities.



Huh, well this seems interesting. You decide to flip through it!





[Mantra Instructions] has been added to the Team Pile!
[Apple of Enlightenment Sigil: <Hollywood Shenanigans>] has been added to the Team Pile!

Whoa. Now that's funky fresh!

You definitely had fun tonight, but it's late and you're feeling a little tired! Nah, just kidding! You never get tired!

Eddie the Epic Bulbasaur (S: Grass/Poison)

Classy: Slappy Happy Classy
Style: Trigger Happy (2 DMG, 100% CoH)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 4/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 0/12
Groovy Abilities: Reincarnate | Perky Stuff!: Browser History Hacking

[Neo Emolga]

For my first action I'll do some working out, for the very likely senario that I fall into another trap.
Then for my second, I'll go talk to 57 Mooker the Slowbro.

FIRST ACTION!

Eww. The Squawkers have slapped you with a little more flab and fab and that's no good! You decide to break out into THRASHMASTER SAVAGE FERAL MAYHEM STATE and as a result, you defy logic and science and even as a little Cinccino (actually, you're average-sized for a Cinccino), you throw a tractor, chew on some granite, break a Nokia phone using legendary Grandmaster Kung Fu, and materialize your very own ANGELRAZOR SWORD and chop up a random demon into so many pieces and bits that there's not enough left of him to make gravy. Why, such fantastical physical activity and badassery is working its magic!

Fírnen broke science and logic, thus shaving off 2 points of Belly and 2 points of Overwhelming Cuteness!

You feel odd, but fantastic! You do a dance, you wink, you taunt, you score a touchdown! The crowd cheers! Your approval rating has gone up by 71.37% and have gained 8,424 new followers on Twitter!

---

SECOND ACTION!

You wanna chat with Mooker! Maybe he has something funny and zany to say! You'd like that!

Interview Rapport: POSITIVE!
+1 Same Evolution Stage

You find Mooker works as a bellhop at the Silver Orange Hotel! He's very nicely dressed and you watch him load those frilly luggage carts with ease that makes it clear he's been doing this for... too long. He helps a married Drilbur couple check into the hotel by helping them with their bags, and it seems like they try to have an intelligent conversation with him, but Mooker just nods and let's his tongue hang out like it's a doll's pull string and it will make him say something silly. He drools a bit. They decide not to tip.

You then approach Mooker, wondering if he has anything interesting to say. You introduce yourself as the prestigious Fírnen the Incredible Cinccino and he applauds and then asks when you're having lunch, though it's well into the evening. You begin to believe Mooker might have forgotten to eat.

You then ask Mooker about the Squawkers, and he begins to act like a Chatot! He sings a song about raisins, haircuts, and teepees, and then acts like you're interviewing him on a famous talk show called Chatter Channel! You nod, trying to play along like it's a moronic game of charades. You then role-play yourself as the famous detective Schnoz, and Mooker nods again. You ask, "have you seen anything bizarre, Mooker?"

He does five jumping jacks and then hands you a card. You bow and take it respectfully.

[Disguised Card Key #2 $500 Snax$ Gift Card to Appleknee's] has been added to the Team Pile!

You have no idea how Mooker came to be in possession of such a thing, but you figure whatever. It's yours now!

He then starts humming "Do You Want to Build a Snowman" and painfully, that song gets stuck in your head. Yes, you hear it! He giggles, and then decides to try and swallow a watermelon whole. You decide to let him know you need to head off to go catch a plane because your IQ feels threatened.

Off you go!

Fírnen the Incredible Cinccino (S: Normal)

Classy: Guardian Snow Angel
Style: Ecstatic About Static! (Player Explosions do not add to the Entertainment Level of Kawaii Armageddon Event #2)
Goodies #1: <Empty>
Goodies #2: <Empty>
Belly: 2/8
Overwhelming Cuteness: 3/12
Groovy Abilities: Amigo Mode | Perky Stuff!: Hollywood Shenanigans

[Neo Emolga]

#54 Dackydee the Grotle was turned into a Pokémon Trading Card Game card by the Squawkers!

OMG WHERE DID IT HAPPEN!?: 7 Pinz and Spinz Bowling Alley!

"I've come to the conclusion...!" Biggs declared as he found the card that used to be Dackydee, "that one of these Stalkers keeps turning Pokémon into cards!"

"Oooh, oooooh, is it a good one!?" Vivi pouncing up and down with excitement. "Pleeeeeeease give it to me if it is!"

"No, it's evidence!" Biggs smiled as he slipped it into a baggie. "No touchy-touchy! Besides, I found it first. Nya-hah ha-ha ha!"

Once again, Wedge snapped and swiped the evidence bag away from Biggs. He would have liked to bonk the Lopunny on the head, but even that would have been counterproductive.

"We don't have much time left and this keeps happening!" Wedge shouted at the bunny Pokémon. "Do we have anything that suggests what Squawker this could be attributed to!?"

But Biggs just smiled and shrugged.

"I was keeping notes!" Biggs smiled. "They all became chocolate, but at least they were tasty!"

"GET WITH THE PROGRAM and try to find similarities between this and what happened to Jinkies," Wedge growled again. "There has to be a link between these cards!"

"Al?" Vivi asked, before snorting with laughter. "He's like the only Squawker at least everyone knows about."

"Ooh, you reminded me!" Biggs laughed. "Today I read another one of those fortunes! It read 'just because Al isn't typed as ice doesn't mean he isn't nice!'"

Wedge had mixed feelings. It was a helpful fact, but didn't really have anything to do with the current investigation. He couldn't complain, as it least this was some minor form of progress.

"Let's take this back to my condo," Wedge suggested. "I've been compiling our investigation notes there and have been trying to rebuild what we lost."

"Oooh, do you have a hot tub up there?" Vivi asked, getting all excited. "Sometimes I like to see if I can beat the machine and out-fart its bubbles! I've never won yet, but I'm getting better! My record is two and a half minutes!"

"On second thought, let's not," Wedge sighed.

Happy Apocalyptic Candy Event 1: Squawkers Wipe Out Too Many Civilians:
The Squawkers are turning everyone into silly objects and dessert food items! This can't be allowed to continue because it'll be a bad day otherwise!
5/20

(4) Chinny Ping Bang Games Studios has been entirely turned into candy!

All Peeps have had their Belly stat reduced by 2 Points!

[Neo Emolga]

The sun has risen in Booplesnoot!
Submit your Day 6: Day Cycle Actions now!



This Morning's Weather Is...
Perfectly Normal Day!
No changes! Perfectly clear skies and plenty of fresh air!

Time Remaining:


Oooohhhh, freak out!

@Chakramaster @Noblejanobii @VeloJello @Scytherwolf @Shruikan @arnisd @Bulbasaur @Suicune's Fire @Ladybugclue

[Chakramaster]

May need to start spreading the search now. So I'm gonna search (59b) The Arcade and Playground (CANDY)

[Ladybugclue]

Let's talk with Napkin the Meowstic.
"Sup, Napkin. With a name like that you must have a clean slate, or so I hope. Or perhaps you just napkin around.
Excuse my puns actually, what do you know of the squawkers?"