"Today was a terrible day because..."

[Suicune's Fire]

Got threatened to be kicked out because I apologized for not washing the dishes correctly and not having all my chemistry homework done yet.

e_e Tbh sounds like you need to move out anyway. Dx I don't know how you can live with your mother. You shouldn't have to deal with that kind of BS. Though obviously moving out is a huge thing so it's not like you can just up and go, but...yeesh. I'm so sorry you have to deal with her. She sounds like she has a lot of issues to work out.



It didn't happen today, but a few days ago we had to properly remove one of the players in my D&D group. The group consists of me, my mate Ro, the DM, and the DM's girlfriend. So the four of us. Back in 2017, I played my first session of D&D with the same DM, Ro, and two other people. We had a second session with the same people some months later. Since then, those two other people have stopped playing with us for their own reasons, but the current campaign, which we began playing sometime in 2018, was a continuation of the campaign we'd played in those two sessions prior. However, the DM's girlfriend wanted to play because she'd never played before, so we continued the campaign with the four of us.

Along the way the DM's girlfriend was learning how to play and she was exploring different ways to play and ended up cycling through three characters. I stuck with one the whole time. But she loves character creation, so we got it. However over the course of the campaign, we realised that she was becoming somewhat destructive and disrespectful, and would do things to sabotage our characters, or moments they had, so that she could shift the spotlight over to herself. She made it very clear that she enjoyed antagonising Ro, even going so far as to create characters just to annoy him, and looking back, she did the same to me as well. However, you know, I had faith that she was a decent person so I didn't put much stock in it. But then more things kept happening and three sessions ago, which was the last session she was a part of, she did something that really pissed me off. Basically we were trying to save a monastery of monks from an incursion of trolls and grimlocks emerging from underground through their tunnels, and fronting the assault was a fomorian, which is a deformed, hideous giant. Very stupid, also. We'd trapped the fomorian in a room and it was senselessly bashing at the walls to try to escape (not realising it wasn't strong enough to break them), so while figuring out how to proceed, the monk leader was telling us that, basically, all the PCs should try to kill the fomorian while the monk acolytes should be placed at the underground road entrance to fight off the incursion. My character was in agreement, but the DM's girlfriend was arguing that the acolytes should come with us to fight the fomorian...while leaving nobody to defend the underground roads. The monk leader then proceeded to tell us that the acolytes were in training still, and would be killed if they were thrown up against the massive giant in the other room, but that they stood a chance against the incursion because of numbers and tactical placement.

DM's girlfriend proceeded to argue again and again, despite me very clearly outlining that the monk who has trained all the acolytes knows their capability better than anyone and is literally telling us the most effective course of action, but she just kept refusing to budge. Eventually she ended up giving in, and was being extremely dismissive and like "Fine. Whatever. Do what you want," which she finishes off with her proceeding to word how her character breaks the fourth wall and "looks off into the distance as if at a camera and smirks." And oh my god, good thing I have self-restraint because I was ready to freaking strangle her. She was being intentionally defiant because, despite LOGIC, she wasn't getting her way. And to her, it was like we were strong-arming her into my plan. Which was not the case. I was so furious that I had to get up and leave the table to go and cool off. xD It was so incredibly disrespectful and this, piled with all the other crap she'd pulled and insistence on the spotlight constantly being on her built up, made me consider leaving the game. I would normally talk to people about this kind of thing, but I knew it would only cause conflict, which was likely to carry over to the actual game itself. As well as that, we're not that close and so I didn't feel like I could bring her up on the things she was doing. To top it all off, being the DM's girlfriend, I didn't want it to have an impact on their relationship outside the game if there was tension between players.

A few weeks after that session (oh P.S. we managed to save the monastery AND all none of the acolytes died thanks to COMMON SENSE), Ro and I were unable to lock in the dates that DM's girlfriend wanted to do, which made her chuck a hissy and she was like, "That's it, the whole campaign is cancelled." And despite such threats, the DM's response was very much, "Oh honey, that's not how it works." So she was like "Fine you'll have to play without me then!!!" so we were like "...Okay!" xD So we played a session without her, and oh my god it was so peaceful. Don't get me wrong, it was still filled with heinous plans forged by malicious and malevolent bad guys, but there was no weird tension between players (being JUST Ro and me XD) and it was so much fun. So then after that, leading up to the session we had on Thursday, she suddenly goes, "Okay I want back in." And...well...Ro basically said she wasn't welcome. xD Which I agreed with.

SO THEN COMES THE FALLOUT! Girlfriend freaks out, talks to DM, blocks both Ro and me, and demands that the DM never mention us (his close friends) ever again, and never speak of anything we do together... xD Which is obviously unsustainable. Anyway, she descends further, shows up at his house unannounced, and starts spurting nonsense about Ro and me not wanting her and DM to be together, and yeah, oof... So we had the session on Thursday, and brought in a mutual friend who we played a day game with shortly before I left for the US, and he was fantastic! And we all had a great time, but the DM had to go outside and spent like two hours on the phone to gf. They're not broken up yet, but likely will be by the end of the week.

At first I felt really guilty, then I was mad, then guilty/sad again, and now I'm back to this weird middle-ground where I learned other crappy things she did and said during the campaign and I'm very glad she won't be around anymore, but I'm sad she got hurt as well. It really sucks that it had to happen, but honestly she's a very toxic person and I didn't know that until recently. O_o Poor DM was stuck in the middle of all this, trying to mediate while also trying to salvage his relationship. Turns out she's been putting him under a lot of pressure in their relationship as well, so it's best for him if they separate. This whole time, I had no idea how she really was. It sucks. =/