Welcome to my hilarious world of zany Pokémon art reviews where you can spend your extra procrastination time!
Ho, ho, hold on, you’re still not done with your Christmas shopping!? :O
Get your defibrillator ready, because CHRISTMAS IS NEXT WEEK! Might be a good idea to find a nice, safe place to pass out, unless you’re reading this from your bed! That’s the perfect place to zonk out! But if you’re reading this on the toilet… this silly flying squirrel sends his deepest apologies and will tell Santa to send you some extra paper towels and Scrubbing Bubbles this year.
Onto the art reviews!
Oh my gawsh, wook at da wee widdle chahmahnda an’ hees cutesy beadie ahyes! Aww, he jus wanna be your bestahest lil’ fawend fa evah an’ evaaahhhh!
But then they snap. Yeah, this is how they get you, little friend. They lure you in, make you think they’re all cool and cute and yeah and all and so on but it always starts with him stealing your cookies. Then he’ll move onto your root beer. Next thing you know, he’s robbing the local Wal-Mart using YOUR car, running over the neighbor’s cat, and then finishing it off with him sinking a boat, crashing a plane, and extra holes in your backyard where green beans start mysteriously growing for no good reason.
He’s cute but just be careful with little guys like this. They’re always watching…
Wha!? Why what do you know, these are my favorite shiny Pokémon too! Look at all of them, they’re amazing and unique! But oh, I’d love to arrange it as a 3×3 so we could totally play Hollywood Squares with them! Or a really short and disastrous game of Tetris.
HEY, what do you mean you can’t see them!?
It’s the child of a bunny and Mickey Mouse with paper wings!
Think about how much more fun life would be with a PAPPEROTHY around! You could write “go buy some more milk already” on its wings and tell it to go flutter around your boyfriend! Tell it to go all over his face! Way more effective than a text message that you already know he’ll snooze through and not even look at until six hours later! But not with a PAPPEROTHY!
Think of all the great excuses a PAPPEROTHY could provide!
“Teacher, I did my homework but it was a PAPPEROTHY and it flew away with all the answers!”
“Huh, I never got an eviction notice! You probably printed it on a PAPPEROTHY!”
“I need an extension on my tax return on the account of it accidently being completed on a PAPPEROTHY!”
It’s cute and it provides you with all the excuses you need in life!
And finally use the bathroom! Just don’t take Pikachu with you, dude. Pikachu don’t wanna see no Pikapoo.
Funny, usually it’s Meganium that looks all cheery and docile and instead, this time Typhlosion takes a turn being all smiley! Meanwhile, Meganium is giving you the evil eye like you talked about Fight Club, crossed the streams, and didn’t buy any Girl Scout cookies when her daughter Chikorita came up to your front door!
Looks like Feraligatr hasn’t forgotten about the time you unplugged his refrigerator after spending a hundred bucks on milk, ice cream, and egg nog. Happy Holidays, limpy.
That’s all, folks! Remember that whoever said money is the root of all evil probably forgot to bring their wallet along when they tried ordering coffee.
Cheers and good times!