FINALLY! INTERNET! WORKING INTERNET! Now that i can get on using a mouse and keyboard, i will leave my thoughts on the chapters i read while i was stuck on my tablet (10-14).


Spoiler:

Wow, the chapters got really long. FIRST GM CROPS, NOW GM POKEMON? WHAT HAS THIS WORLD COME TO!?!?!?!? And poor Luck and Roarake D=. Also, I can't believe that Izante turned out to betray Dusty! You really portrayed Dusty's emotions (Particularly her sadness) very well; so well that I could feel them myself. I'm really hoping that Izante makes a reappearance. I would actually be pretty surprised if she doesn't show up again at some point.

Really the only thing about the story so far I have to criticize is the fact that I think it jumps around perspectives a little too much, which can get confusing. Also how it jumped to the future briefly then the 15 minutes earlier thing really confused me at first. The first part is most likely just more personal preference, but the second part, i think you should either have somehow made it clearer that it had jumped into the future, or ended the chapter and made the jump the start of the next chapter. Oh, and there were a few times i saw where it looked like you had tried to italisize something but you accidentelly typed [/I][/I] and stuff like that instead of

just curious since if it said this somewhere, i missed it: How old are Dusty and Izante?