My parents just called. My dog is in the hospital with a large stomach tumor. Her stomach is filled with blood and her intestines are a mess. My parents coming to get me now so I can go see her at 7:30 tomorrow morning. And after I see her, they're probably going to let her go. She's almost thirteen and a half. I always knew this day would come. But honestly I'm not ready. I've had her since I was 5. She was always smiling at me and when we took her to the kennel the house always felt so empty. She brought the place alive. God, I'm crying so much right now. I don't know what I'm going to do without her. She was the puppy I got for Christmas after my first dog died. I'm not ready. I remember all the times she ran off and I would have to chase her. I remember how she played with the neighbor dogs and the rest of the kids. I still own some of the clothes she teethed on. Heck, my favorite glasses case was gnawed on by her. I haven't played with her nearly enough. I haven't hugged her nearly enough. I haven't told her I loved her nearly enough. Why did she have to leave me so soon? Not even five days ago I was joking with my mom about making her an emotional support animal so I could keep her in the dorm with me. She was like a sister to me and I'm losing her.

This isn't the first time I've dealt with this, but I forgot how painful this is. My chest hurts, I feel sick, and I just want to wake up from this nightmare.