[WAR] Jupiter Mining Corporation

[Elbub]

You know what.

YOU KNOW WHAT.

If a WAR team can originate that is based around literally one of my favourite universes in the literary and video world, and I don't join it, then I don't think I could forgive myself.

Username: Elbub
Number: 23
Skills: I'm the ASB judge. Guaranteed points, baby.

But if you need more convincing (I may have let myself down with the whole 1-10 thing), then please take on board this sterling piece of character evidence;

I ask the court, look at this man. This man who sat and failed his astro-navigation exam on no less than 13 occasions. This sad man. This pathetic man. This joke of a man.

I ask the court one key question: Would the Space Core ever have allowed this man to be in a position of authority where he might endanger the entire crew? A man so petty and small minded, he would while away his evenings sewing name labels onto his ship issue condoms. A man of such awesome stupidity...

..a man of such awesome stupidity, he even objects to his own defence counsel. An over-zealous, trumped up little squirt...

...an incompetent vending machine repairman with a Napoleon complex, who commanded as much respect and affection from his fellow crew members as Long John Silver's parrot.

Who would allow this man, this joke of a man, this man who could not outwit a used tea bag, to be in a position where he might endanger the entire crew? Who? Only a yoghurt.