Neo, I'm so happy that you're posting a director's cut, if you will. It may have been around seven years since I first read it, but your prose still has a way of putting a fire in my belly. Not to mention the story you've crafted. For the most part, I loved the changes made. It was wonderful to get to see a deeper look at Jake's life outside of bullying Randy and you gave Alex and David more defined personalities, and, my favorite, you expanded the legend of Juno to even this genesis point with an exciting description of Jake's bonding with the soul of the imaginary Pikachu. At the same time, you kept the important elements the same, especially those two's Pokemon teams (and especially especially Alex's Mightyena and Houndoom!), while also expanding the fact that these Pokemon are being transformed by Randy and what that process looks like. Ah. The music rings true to the scenes as well, adding those auras of emotion and mystery to your already excellent wordsmithing.
My only complaints are small, selfish ones really. First, the updating of Pokemon species to incorporate newer ones like Pidove and Lilligant makes me a little wary, since I'd like to relive the bygone days of my youth without Pokemon who weren't in existence then. I guess I consider the story a product of its period more than a living document, but, seeing as how updating species has been going on for a while and that you're editing and expanding it with this reposting that theories gone the way of Yoda being a puppet, though I still hold that a Pidove and a Sewaddle would be fairly out of place in Viridian City. The other is that I remember the battle between Jake and Frank ending differently, with Jake managing to pull off an amazing win despite the blatant cheating of Frank. It makes more sense for the story if Frank's created Pokemon, like Randy's, prove immune to harm by ordinary Pokemon so that Coldblood can power up Jake's own Pokemon, but there was something satisfying about seeing two Grass-types (my personal favorites) triumph over legendaries.
In case you haven't guessed, I'm kind of a bastard and root for Jake, Alex, and David every time I read about their antics. I swear I'm not a bully in real-life, but there's an element of fun to them, especially with the extended description of their laxative prank that was in earlier editions, that isn't as much a component to Randy and his crew's petty revenges. I sympathize with them too much I guess, but to be fair, they did get most of the cool Pokemon.
Anyways, looking forward to keep on rereading this saga and seeing what other new and exciting changes are around the corner!